Explosive row with daughter

Oh how sorry I am to read that Gingster
It will be all the stress and raw emotion on both sides coming out.
You have been the most supportive mother to your daughter.
Things said in the moment hopefully will be forgiven by both sides.Lots of understanding and love from me.

Don’t beat yourself up Gingster, so much going on, you’ve been an amazing Mum, incredibly helpful and supportive, emotions running high. That great big making up hug will be very special.

Aw this will be upsetting for you both.
You’re each tired, emotional and anxious. So you’ve had fireworks and both sounded off. You feel guilty because of her diagnosis and she will feel upset because she knows how much support you’ve supplied.

Bet you both make up once you’ve both had time to reflect and miss one another - before the end of the weekend I wager!

Please go sort this out with your daughter and don't leave it to fester

I still haven't forgotten the hateful things my daughter said about me last year out of the blue.Luckily she is staying with my son this Christmas so I will only see her on the Sunday.

I am so sorry to hear this Gingster. I have had some humdingers with my DD also and know how you feel. I am sure she is feeling just as bad.
You are both bottling up your worries and sooner or later things explode.
Try to sort it out sooner rather than later. You love each other and that is what matters. I always made the first move as I saw myself as the grownup. One one occasion when I approached DD I found her to be in bits also.

I do hope you sort things out - sending love.

I agree with Dragonfly I always say I'm sorry because I am the responsible adult supposedly
I bite my tongue a lot till it's sore.
I hope this frisson blows over soon.
It's totally understandable.

Thanks lovely ladies. I felt I had to unload and knew I would have support here.
She’s also got to vacate her house (rented) as it’s being sold. Stress and pressure of trying to find her somewhere else. She has to move just after Christmas.

Go and give her a hug Gingster. It sounds as if you both need it. Sending hugs to you both from me.

Gingster I agree with everyone else. It's the stress! Acnd, possibly the drugs. You have been amazing- you both know that. I think it's inevitable!

Our 47 year old DD told us that our form of parenting wasn't working for her so I know how difficult biting one's tongue is.

Gingster I have pm’d you xxx

Oh dear. I hope you can patch things up. A few years ago, I lost my temper with our DD over the way we were being treated. I am usually a mouse but I was fed up so this mouse roared. She wasn't happy but thankfully we are still on good terms.

Sounds like you are both stressed to the max Gingster take advice from dragonfly and give her a hug. Don't take it too much to heart these things happen. My eldest & I are so alike we often flare up at each other, still friends though thankfully. Good luck.

A forced move on top of Cancer treatment - not to mention Christmas thrown in will be putting you both under enormous pressure. Things do get said. Hope you can both put it behind you and move on because she's going to need you in the New Year.

Can you phone or visit as soon as possible Gingster? Hope you make up soon. You will both feel much better x

Ginster, not much to add to the kindly advice given here.
If you can, go and hug her, she probably needs it, wants it, but is not sure how to ask.
Her mind is no doubt, all over the place, with her treatment and worry. I can't imagine what you are going through as well.

When I had my bone cancer diagnosis, I honestly didn't think that I would see last Christmas, but I am still here for this one.
Sending you both lots and lots of love and hugs.

Thankyou everyone for your time and good wishes. Lots of good advice. ❤️

Emotions are very raw given the circumstances

I agree with vs

Gingster
Nothing to add but I hope you will hug and make up

A mother's place is always in the wrong (even if we know we're right).

And kittylester

If you can't sort it out by talking now, you could just send a text saying that no matter how things were left, you love her. At least you will reassure that you are there ready to support again. Meanwhile, a big virtual hug from me who has had these moments with her daughter and knows how it rips you apart inside.

PLEASE,please do not let this fester. A lovely Card, perhaps some flowers, anything, as long as she gets the message of SO SORRY, LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!!

How are things today Gingster? Having followed the ‘journey’ (hate that word, but can’t conjure up a better one) you’re on with your DD, I was so sorry to read your post yesterday. As others have said emotions must be raw and nerves shredded.
I sincerely hope you are able to patch things up. Christmas, ill health and an enforced move do not augur well, for a happy, peaceful time. I really wish you both back on an even keel. X

You'll find the right words to say, say them soon and accept what she says. It is a very stressful time for you both made worse by Christmas looming.

I’ve messaged Dd but had no reply as yet. I think a cooling off period is called for. I know it won’t last long but we both need to step away for a few days and calm down.
Thanks for thinking of us. ❤️