Son is troubled about partner stopping breast feeding

Fleurpepper. WOW! I’m disgusted that you were told at the hospital to bottlefeed, and that it was much easier! It certainly isn’t much easier, what with sterilising and making up the bottles. It’s obviously better to breastfeed, because that’s what your breasts are for and that’s what breast milk is for, to feed babies. Cows milk is for baby cows. I know not everyone can do it as sometimes there are insurmountable problems, and I sympathise with mums who want to do it and can’t. I know it can be hard and your nipples get sore, but usually that’s temporary. When I had my first child in 1974, they took him away the first night and bottle fed him without even asking, to give all the mums a rest the first night and they did the same to all the other babies. They wouldn’t dream of doing that nowadays. In those days, you stayed in for a week, now you’re lucky if you’re in for two days. It’s crazy that there seemed to be a fashion to bottle feed in the 50s and 60s. After my first baby, the doctor visited me at home and said, “back to nature” as if it was something unusual. I’m very glad that I breastfed my 3?children.

I had my first child in 1981. When i had my second it was 1992.

I was horrified to learn that the baby wasn't being taken to the nursery at night to give me a rest like they did with my first

It really doesn't help when people say that cow's milk is for cows I chose not to breast feed. However when women genuinely can't breast feed but want to it can be devastating. So think on before saying cow's mulhouse is for babies. It's silly. And cruel.

Mulhouse! Great word. Should be milk.

Yes it is cruel. Many don’t breastfeed for all sorts of reasons and comments about cow’s milk are very hurtful.

I’d be more concerned about his lack of support. And I breastfed my children until they were 18months old. Their relationship doesn’t sound healthy.

Daddima

Apart from Bluebelle, has anybody noticed that Thespigran has left?

having lobbed a predictably v goady post...
maybe it was all a big act.

@ThespiGran you've been put in a difficult position as by the sounds of it has your daughter in law
Pumping is a lot harder than actually. Brrastfeeding and if she was also feeding the pumped milk most of the time that takes up so much time, it's a shame that she couldn't get help in the early days, there is help out there. One breastfeeding experience that doesn't go well doesn't mean another time it will be impossible, that with support many mothers have found that they can do what they want ie feed their baby at the breast, I've supported mothers to be successful second, third, fourth, fifth time round.
Who on earth would tell a mother that bottle. Feeding us easier, if you make up the formula and sterilize the bottles according to up to date guidelines. I bet those other grandparents aren't going to be sterilizing bottles for her and making up formula at all hours if the day and night, it's not like in the old days when mums would make up bottles and keep them in the fridge for the day. I'd hate to have to do that myself and no one tells new mums what a massive faff it is

I think OP has left but this is an interesting thread!
I was reading the Motherhood Book written in the 1930s.
If you could afford it back then you'd have had a monthly nurse who would help you to look after your baby, wash the baby's linen, make light meals and so on.
I wish I'd had one of them!

Some mothers will find bottle feeding easier and preferable to breast feeding. It's the mother's choice and as long as the baby is happy, healthy and content that's all that matters.

Agree with oodles that bottle feeding seems a lot more trouble than breastfeeding! Obviously some choose bottle feeding for a variety of reasons, but there is not enough publicity about the convenience (and cheapness) of bf for those women who find it easy. I would definitely consider it the "lazy" option - it was for me at least!

The worst of options seems to be pumping and then bottle feeding baby - twice as much work.

Grammaretto

I think OP has left but this is an interesting thread!
I was reading the Motherhood Book written in the 1930s.
If you could afford it back then you'd have had a monthly nurse who would help you to look after your baby, wash the baby's linen, make light meals and so on.
I wish I'd had one of them!

My mother was a Nanny.
When a new baby arrived in the family a 'monthly nurse' would be employed. Nanny also had a nursery nurse to help with the baby and other child(ren).

Parents saw the children for an hour or so in the evening, when they had been bathed, fed and ready for bed
🙂

Hollycat

Back in the ‘70’s in the days when “women could have everything” and when I had my children, the pressure was NOT to breastfeed, You gave birth, were taken back to bed and told you were not to get out of it for two days! They cleaned you up and the baby arrived with a nurse and a tiny bottle of milk. This was the Whittington Hospital in Highgate, London. The ward had 16 mothers in it, the only one who breastfed was an American who insisted on it. Everyone, including the nurses thought she was mad. My baby was a forceps delivery so I had to stay in for 10 days., rather than the usual 7. When I left I was presented with a “Bounty Box” and four of the tiny bottles of milk to take home. At a checkup with my own GP he told me not to use formula milk saying it was only introduced in the war because milk production couldn’t be guaranteed. He told me to feed the baby on silver top milk, two parts milk and one part boiled water with a teaspoon of sugar. He was adamant the milk shouldn’t be My second child, five years later, but in Chase Farm Hospital, Enfield, was exactly the same, only this time I was sent home after only two days. None of my friends breastfed either. Both have grown up disgustingly healthy and are 53 and 48 respectively. I can’t see the problem.

Exactly the same here. I gave birth through the 70's, in London hospitals, and didn't want to breastfeed.

The hospital were fine - got the Bounty Bags and some SMA formula - all good.👍

They are now mid 40's, and are completely healthy.

How to feed needs to be the choice of the woman - it has nothing to do with anyone else, professional or family.

I've never heard of all those "rules" for grandparents to follow though - my bottle feeding daughter used to want me visiting when she had her four kids, so that she could have a bit of chill time, and the odd glass of wine, while I did some feeding, changing, looking after the other children and whatever else.😉

LRavenscroft

I did not breast feed at all and my child was the healthiest in the class with very few days off school. It is the mother's choice and her choice alone. Leave the poor lady alone and let her enjoy her baby time without meddling. I would have been furious if someone had challenged my choice and told them to get lost. Apart from that my mum, dad and husband got a look in with the feeding too and my child now very much adult is one of the most balanced and happy people you could wish to meet. Each to their own, live and let live!

I couldn’t agree more. I didn’t breastfeed any of my three babies. They were all very healthy and still are as adults.