In times of trouble what do you do?

Crying just gives me a headache and a blotchy face so I tend to share with friends, walk the dog (and perhaps have a good scream or shout in the middle of a field well away from anybody) "focus" (is that another way of saying "pray"?) I also eat for England - I think that is a survival reflex- and finally a few stiff whiskies don't solve anything but can provide a temproary anaesthetic, but basically it is just one foot in front of the other.

Like others, if life really goes wrong, as it has done a couple of times, I am a total hypocrite and pray.
I suffer from depression, and find it very difficult to talk about my feelings or discuss problems with anyone, even my ever so understanding wife.

Once I can get to talk about problems, things quickly improve, a problem shared is certainly a problem halved.

I like Ambrose Bierce's definition, in his Devil's Dictionary...

"PRAY, v.
To ask that the laws of the universe be annulled in behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy."

When I was in between my breast cancer diagnosis and the op. I can remember one day being in a total state of panic and prowling the house. DH took my onto the South Downs for a walk with dog - it was cold and wet and windy but it definately calmed me down. My resources have to come from within me - nothing else works.

A visit from Ben and Jerry soothes but solves nothing!

I'm not given to what I think is known as "storm conversion" – praying when in danger, having not prayed while safe. I might have an initial cry about something bad, but am not given to continual sobbing. I wake up and worry, even when I try to make myself think of something else. I once spent the best part of a night planning more than 200 different pack lunches for school in an effort to take my mind off other things. I do my best to find a solution to a problem that is troubling me and am not good at accepting that maybe I can do nothing about it. If I am very troubled, I find it impossible to eat. During one especially difficult period in my life I ended up weighing less than six stone – I am 5 foot 10 inches.

Blimey! absentgrana I was probably about 3 tha last time I weighed 6st. and I am only 5ft 7

I am sure you know how dangerous that was, absent, and are eating properly now.

absentgrana, I am like that too! I can't imagine 'comfort eating' when in a state of anxiety - the thought of food makes me feel ill in times of stress.

I'm beginning to think that 'praying' by non-believers in times of stress is simply a means of organising one's thoughts, and expressing hope for a good outcome. Perhaps it is also a calming down mechanism. I remember seeing a war film where these American soldiers were rowing to hellishly dangerous war zone where they were likely to die, and were chanting the Hail Mary. It was clearly a panic suppressor.

Log on to Gransnet and share with those who have dealt with similar worries, heartaches and disappointments.

You could be right there Joan.

It's definitely calming. And it does get thoughts organised.

Re Joan's comment: I think you are absolutely correct. If you are to share a problem with someone (or something), you have to organize it in your mind first, and in doing that sometimes a solution will present itself. So whoever or whatever you discuss your problem with, you will benefit from having to examine that problem.