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PM s “removed at user request”

(28 Posts)
Atqui Fri 15-Apr-22 11:47:52

Does this mean removed by the sender, or have I done something by accident to delete the message?

Shinamae Fri 15-Apr-22 11:49:04

I have had this and really don’t understand it at all..?

JaneJudge Fri 15-Apr-22 11:51:14

it means the other person has deleted it i think

shall we do a test? I will message you atqui and then you could delete it or reply and i delete the original or something like that?

Marydoll Fri 15-Apr-22 11:57:57

If another poster deletes a PM, even if sent from you to them or vice versa, you get that message. Nothing sinister.
It's good IT housekeeping to clear out your inbox, every so often.

Atqui Fri 15-Apr-22 16:57:59

Ok Jane I try it when I get home

JaneJudge Sat 16-Apr-22 10:17:37

I've deleted it now, what does it say your end? smile

Joane123 Sat 16-Apr-22 11:12:58

Whoever deletes the message results in both the receiver''s and the sender's message being deleted.

muse Sat 16-Apr-22 12:30:32

I wish the system wasn't set up to do that and have queried the purpose of it.

If I create a pm, I should be allowed to keep it. GNHQ say no. Apparently something to do with data protection regulations. GN has to be GDPR compliant !

As the others have said, once you start a pm and it becomes a conversation, if either party in the conversation deletes their own message, the whole conversation is deleted (both sides).

I was once tempted to report a pm I had received but I decided to reply to it to resolve the situation. Wrong decision, so when I went onto my pms, less than 24 hours later to report the sender and ask GNHQ to investigate the conversation, my one pm and the sender's pms had been deleted: by the sender.

I explained my predicament to GNHQ but they can't reinstate deleted messages and will only act on pms if they are reported. Catch 22 situation.

Jaxjacky Sat 16-Apr-22 12:36:23

Interesting, never happened to me, now I know how it works.

Grandmafrench Sat 16-Apr-22 15:08:13

Ridiculous idea that you can't recover copies of your own mails, Muse. But if you receive anything in your inbox which is 'iffy', disrespectful or unpleasant, the best thing to do is to screenshot it immediately, thus preventing the sender from deleting it. It's naive to think that all DM's are going to be nice ones - some people just can't help themselves - and at least you then have the proof as to what has been said if you need to deal with GNHQ.

Jaxjacky Sat 16-Apr-22 16:30:17

Good tip Grandmafrench and noted.

Shandy57 Sat 16-Apr-22 16:38:02

I'm a regular inbox clearer outer, and upset a friend because hers were cleared too. I do think Gransnet need to upgrade the site like Mumsnet, it feels increasingly clunkyl.

Marydoll Sat 16-Apr-22 16:44:25

It is better to save the all contents on to a Word document, that's what I have always done.
Screenshots show everything on your screen and you may not wish to do that.
It's a much more efficient way of doing it. It allows you to protect your self, if you are unjustly accused of something.
In saying that, I have only had very few unpleasant PMs on my time on GN, which I reported immediately.

Marydoll Sat 16-Apr-22 16:46:21

PS, I only saved unpleasant ones. The rest I just delete, as said before, it's good IT housekeeping.

MerylStreep Sat 16-Apr-22 16:58:41

I would advise anyone to swop email addresses with anyone you are in regular contact with. You never know when you might be cancelled ?
If/ when this might happen to you or a friend it will happen immediately and you have no time to contact people to let them know.

muse Sat 16-Apr-22 19:09:37

Thank you all for the advice.

After the upsetting pm I received I did think of screenshots Grandmafrench . I have a short cut on my Mac that changes the cursor into crosshairs and I can then select whatever portion of my display I want to capture in a screen shot but screenshots can be cropped if needs be. I do that quite often with ones taken on my phone. That way you would have the actual pm.

Your question Atqui set me thinking. I agree with Shandy57, Gransnet is in need of an upgrade. Nothing ever happened about all the suggestions lots of us made in a thread started by someone from GNHQ last year. I don't use Mumsnet but is their pm deletion rule different?

JaneJudge Sat 16-Apr-22 19:13:05

muse, you can report PMs there is a function to do that

Grannynannywanny Sat 16-Apr-22 19:16:30

Well that was a major disappointment to say the least. I thought the thread was announcing the Prime Minister had been removed! ?

JaneJudge Sat 16-Apr-22 19:17:05

grin grin grin

muse Sat 16-Apr-22 19:35:26


muse, you can report PMs there is a function to do that

I should have done that straightaway JaneJudge. I'm wiser now. You read of posters saying "report nasty pms" but at the time, I'd never had cause to report a pm before (or after come to that). I thought I'd try to resolve the situation with a reply.

I was just so annoyed at the time that my own pm had been deleted by the sender making it impossible for GNHQ to do anything.

Jaxjacky Sat 16-Apr-22 19:43:03

Grannynannywanny that made me laugh wistfully.

JaneJudge Sat 16-Apr-22 19:45:54

I'm sorry muse, it has happened to me too and I hadn't realised either

Sweetpeasue Sun 25-Sep-22 22:32:22

This has caused great puzzlement to me. But it wasn't only the messages in my inbox being deleted. I couldn't even get through to the person whose messages were deleted. I was assured recently, and I've no reason to disbelieve her at all, that I hadn't been blocked. I'd contacted GN at the time and was told that I had. After a v bad time my messages from this person were again deleted. I was upset. Don't know why this should be so. Surely your own inbox messages are your own private property.

Sweetpeasue Sun 25-Sep-22 22:36:06

I should have made it clear that the first time GN said this person had blocked me, as I couldn't pm her, was about 4 months ago. She got in touch with me recently about 10 days ago

and then, miraculously, I could reply
and communication was opened.

Blinko Sun 25-Sep-22 22:37:48


Well that was a major disappointment to say the least. I thought the thread was announcing the Prime Minister had been removed! ?

Brilliant! ?