How do I get the haircut I want?

As I've hardly ever found a hairdresser who will cut my hair as I like (apart from an amazing chap in Spain once!) I decided years ago to cut my own hair, and can't remember last time I trusted anyone else!! 'Often get compliments - not bragging, just sayin' !!! ?

The cut really is important and I think (I’m sticking my neck out here) only Vidal Sassoon trained stylists cut really well. So if you can find one of those you are laughing. Alternatively if you are not far from London go to their training academy (now in Victoria). They are very heavily supervised, it costs around £30 but you have to allow a lot of time.

I don't blame the hairdresser, I blame my hair. It's very thin and only looks reasonable when the hairdresser has blow dried it. I don't expect to be able to do it myself.

It all sounds like a hell of a hassle when you could be enjoying yourself.

I hate tatting about with my hair.

Hello mom! My mother has the same issue as you do when it comes to a visit to the hairdresser and for years and years I've told her this...

Don't go to a salon with a pic of Helen at the Oscars. Why? Because Helen has had every product under the sun put into her hair to keep every little strand in place. Her colour is all shabang because it's been done hours before she hits the red carpet. Now your stylist can achieve the same look and you can leave looking just like Helen but Helen too sleeps at night, just like you do but here's the difference....when Helen wakes in the morning, she has a beauty team up and ready to transform her into a glamazon. Do you have the same team? That is why it does not look the same.

So you can educate yourself on products to use and how to use them effectively and practice, practice, practice.

Find a style that you can manage & stay with the same good hairdresser, who over time will get to know how your hair grows as well as what you like, what suits you, what styles suit you & how good you are at managing your hair. My once dark brown hair is now almost transparent. I am always thrilled when others say what a lovely shade of grey it is. Being a Leo my hair has always been an important part of my appearance! I have stayed with the same hairdresser for over 30 years! goodness knows what I shall do if she retires but fortunately she is about 15 years younger than me so I’ll probably pop off before she does. I think keeping to a healthy diet plays a big part in having a healthy head of hair too. I keep it in a short bob as I have a small face. Have it cut every 6 to 8 weeks .When I go to her saloon the lovely Angela usually greet me with compliment regarding my hair. We always discuss what she is going to do before she starts. She has been professionally trained. I come out feeling like a million dollars rather than an old lady of 71. Her charges are in line with other saloons, I never tip her but usually give her a small gift at Christmas. good luck.

Find an Italian hairdresser and explain that you do not wish to emerge looking like 'nonna' - after he doubled up with laughter - had a wonderful haircut in London. Made my sparse locks very manageable - wash and wear.

I came to realise over time that it was,nt my hairdresser who could"nt do my hair just as she used to do, but that my hair had changed gradually, becoming much finer than before. Although I still like the same style as I used to have, short and layered to deal with the inevitable frizzyness, it doesn"t last as long as it used to do ....think as we age it can become more of a problem for us.

I have found you get what you pay for. I aim to look like Judy Dench with very short hair and I have finally found a hairdresser who can actually replicate it. He has his own salon, charges high prices although I get a discount because I am a pensioner but above all he is intelligent and has loads of common sense.

I don't think hairdressers need to be particularly young but they DO need to keep up with trends and methods of styling. I'm lucky in that the salon I attend is bang up to date on cutting methods and staff listen to clients and makes sensible suggestions as well as giving ideas for after care. The staff are of mixed ages and gender which adds to the positive outcome. Their mags are up to date as well!!!! I've visited numerous salons over the years and this one is the best ever for me which makes it a pleasant experience.

It’s only for the last 10 years that I’ve felt as you all do. So I’ve recently come to the conclusion that’s it’s not the hairdressers at fault but me and my hair. It was once dark chestnut, thick, lush and easy to manage. My crowning glory. Not so now. Its now almost white (underneath the dye) It’s still thick but coarse, over processed and always looks....well a mess to say the least. I’ve decided to bite the bullet and go grey and so my young hairdressers is helping me do that. It can’t possibl look any worse...can it

Ah the clue is in your post, you were happy when you left the salon, it seems that it is the way that you style it yourself is what you are not happy with, not the cut, some salons offer a styling teaching session to show you how to achieve the result somewhat near to that which the stylist was able to, I say somewhat near because they are professionals with many years of experience, whereas you are not. I would suggest that you return to the salon when you have just done your hair to show him how you are not managing to achieve the same look, it could be that he takes one look at it and knows immediatedly where you are going wrong , I would also suggest don't chose a Saturday to do this it is a hairdressers busiest day and he is less likely to have the time to chat with you.

Go to a top west end salon and pay the earth.

The thing is you don’t have Mirren or Denchs hair. It might not like to go the way you want it to. Work with whatever hair you have. Don’t fight it. You’ll lose. I have curly hair which has now become fizzy. I would love one of those edge short cuts, but my hair would have a fit and I would look like a bloke. One day I might bite the bullet

I had the usual problems when my lovely hairdresser left to have a baby but have found someone who does cut well I am sure that is the most important thing so you can wash and dry it successfully. That said mine is very short now for convenience.

My once very thick hair is now thinner and straggly if it gets too long. I like to have it cut every four weeks. I'm struggling to find someone who understands my problem since my usual hairdresser moved to a salon miles away. I have a hairdresser friend who cuts it occasionally but insists that I should grow it all the same length and into a bob. Two weeks later and it is once again looking thin and straggly! I am trying a new salon next week before I go on holiday so am keeping my fingers crossed for a better result. If I could only cut hair myself, I know exactly what I want!

I pop round the corner to a young Chinese lady called Ping and she hacks a bit off the length in her home salon.

My hair is very fine and flyaway and simply does nothing you want it to. The fringe in particular simple curls outwards - nothing I have ever done will stop it, especially of there is even the tiniest hint of damp in the air. The rest of my long hair just flies around in a mad heap which defies all gels, waxes, conditioners. Ah well - it is a lovely dark brown with not a grey hair in sight, so I take comfort from that!

Oh but it so good to find the one who understands your hair so keep trying! I have been going to a girl who does it from her own home for years now- she worked at Toni & Guy & started doing hair at home when she had a family. She was a friend before I started going to her & when I first I met her I had no idea she was a hairdresser. She is amazing & knows my hair better than I do. My highlights always look great & my hair behaves very well. Plus it is a fraction of the cost a salon would charge & I get to chat to a friend while she makes me presentable again.
Keep looking!

Good point Humbertbear, and if anyone wants to know who to avoid in Paignton they can PM me!!

I've just recalled something which has helped recently. After washing my hair I dry it with a very absorbent towel to get it damp, rather than wet, apply a little gel. When I blow dry my hair at the same time I use a styling brush which has vents in it. I have to change hands halfway through to do both sides.
I've had this brush for years but have only started using it this way recently. Gosh, I must be really thick. It makes such a difference.

FCMadge - you should go back to the hairdresser and ask them how you should deal with your hair. Also, there are places where they teach you how to blow dry your hair. I wear my hair in a bob, have done for many years. Fortunately I have found someone who knows how to cut my thinning hair and the cut often gets compliments.
In case you are wondering, I live in N- W London so if anyone wants to know where to get the best haircut PM me. But we warned, you get the cut you pay for!

I have great sympathy..... this time I even took a photo of myself rather than a celebrity, and I most particularly said I did not want more than 1cm off the collar. The hairdresser agreed as my hair is so curly it springs up to look much shorter than it is.
The hairdresser allowed himself to be distracted and taken to other clients 4 times before he cut 3 inches off the shoulder length.
I really hate what he has done to my hair and I shall never go back there again.

Same hairstylist since I moved here 30yrs ago. Same fabulous cut that falls into place even after a hurricane looking like it never moved. Always commented on. Never take a comb out with me, just run fingers through in right direction. But each day I wake up with a right bedhead, hair stuck out in all directions, a right sight! So very morning I blow dry it after spraying lightly with water, a touch with the GDH bstraighteners and I’m salon fresh. Takes just 20mins first thing and I’m sorted for whole day right through evening too. If I didn’t, then I’m sure I would feel exactly as some OP do because it’s not how I came out of the salon originally...

I have shoulder length hair so just have it trimmed, but over the years with different styles ive noticed it’s not the cut but the way they dry your hair. I think this is what most struggle with, as they use professional dryers, are standing while we sit,and are trained. We however are not, and I’m sure this is why we cannot get the style right when we do it’s ourselves.

It is quite funny (and strangely comforting) reading the comments from the UK that so mirror my experience here in Oz. I also had to spell out how to spell 'Mirren' complete with iPad photos to a young '12 year old' hairdresser. It's all about the cut - I leave my hair it's natural grey but have started getting it cut shorter these days. It's never the same after each cut but that may be my hair. I don't need gallons of 'pwoduct' in my hair just a really good cut. Help!