Funeral clothes

I have worked as a Crematorium Chapel Assistant / Administrator at 2 different Crematoria, I was also employed until recently as a Funeral Arranger. I have to say that an enormous amount of funerals today are more about celebrating the life of the deceased, so families are now preferring to dress in brighter colours than in black.
Maybe wear something that you already have at home but pair it with a black jacket / bag / shoes if that would be preferable for you? Or maybe contact the family of the deceased and ask about their dress code for the funeral.
I have overseen funerals where the mourners wore fancy dress, all dressed in the deceased’s favourite football team colours etc. Even my own husband’s funeral was dress as you please, with no formal suits as he was a jeans and t shirt man through and through.

Pls forgive me if this has been suggested but is there a ‘dress (colour) code’ for the Funeral?
Sadly I have attended a couple of Funerals recently and one notification requested ‘colours’ to be worn.
If you have to wear dark colours out of respect, Vinted is great to buy second hand or check out your local charity shops - you don’t want to splash out if the item/s won’t be worn again (hopefully) …
Sorry for your loss.

I personally keep a black skirt and jacket that I only use when attending funeralls and to avoid too many cat hairs on them, I don them just before leaving the house.

If you don't want to wear black, I would suggest you just avoid anything too bright or with a loud pattern.

As others have said the dress code for funerals seems to have changed in that there isn't one anymore unless expressly stated.
I still feel that in spite of that I want to wear something muted to show respect but each to their own and quite frankly the important people at the service won't care at all what anybody is wearing their minds will be elsehwere. Wear whatever you feel comfortable in wearing.

I think there have been lots of helpful suggestions here.

What is important, really, though, is the being there, rather than the colour of the clothes worn.

I personally wouldn’t do ultra casual (thinking jeans, sweatshirts type of thing), as I just wouldn’t feel comfortable doing that, but I would (and have) worn colours other than black when no black has been stipulated.

As Oreo said, sadly there will be other occasions to wear anything you buy for this ceremony, so the items won't go to waste. Just put them aside.
Yes, check to see if there have been suggestions, bright colours, pink.
Sometimes all you need to add to one of your regular outfits is a black scarf/shawl and a black bag.

Grey is always a good option and quite practical for other occasions too. Grey skirt or trousers with a lighter coloured top ( pale grey, cream or white)………and the trousers would look lovely on other occasions with something really vibrantly coloured.

As can be expected at my age I have been to quite a lot of funerals lately. There doesn't seem to be any dress code any more which certainly makes life easier. If you know the deceased well that will help you decide what to wear. My son-in-law died at age 36 and had stipulated that he wanted everyone to wear fancy dress and no black at all. Nearly everybody turned up in Christmas jumpers.

Anyone remember
Brahn Boots
the Stanley Holloway monologue

Why not wear smart clothes in the colour you usually wear and just add a black armband?

I went to a funeral not long ago and wondered why most people were wearing blue, then realised it was for Alzheimer's. No-one had said. I've seen others coming out of the crematorium in bright yellow (for Marie Curie).

I'd try to find out from someone who's attending if there's a suggested dress code.

Clothes in modern fabrics don’t attract pet hairs in the same way that they used to, I know that as a long time pet owner. You could look for an outfit, or a smart jacket in a ponte type fabric?

I have a simple black drape dress that I keep for such occasions. Depending on the person I may wear a colourful scarf.

The two funerals I have attended most recently both requested colour - BiL asked everyone to wear a garment in their favourite colour, friend said he wanted lots of butterflies attending his funeral. But if not told otherwise I would wear a dark colour

Thanks for your suggestions.
I’m very sad and will miss my dear friend hugely. I don’t want to wear bright colours which suggest fun and laughter.
I bought smart dark blue trousers and a plain cream top, which I’ll wear again.

Unless the bereaved family has specified a dress code, I think it is respectful to wear a,dark colour, not necessarily black.
At my DH's funeral, I was upset when one of our close friends turned up in the sailing clothes which he habitually wears. All the other men had seen fit to put on a suit.
Am I silly rmto feel upset?

I wore dark grey to my father’s funeral and purple to my mother’s. I gave the eulogy on both occasions at a Catholic service.

That sounds eminently suitable watermeadow. Sorry for the loss of your friend .

Most funeral these days are a celebration of life, so you do not wear black unless requested. I like black and feel odd in colours, but if that is what your host is requesting that is what you do. Ask them for their dress code if you have not been told.

I'd wear a darkish coloured top/jacket but the rest of outfit could be just a bit subdued. A dress would be dark with no glaring pattern. Very few funerals are attended wearing the all black outfits nowadays. Fir my daughter's funeral I wore black trousers, a pale blue top with sparkles and a pale grey small checked jacket. For DHs it was black trousers, pale blue top and a light blue jacket. Both my sons wore mid blue suits.

Sorry about your friend watermeadow.
I think you've made a good choice.

I once had a funeral and a wedding on the same day on opposite sides of Scotland. I bought a black dress with an inset of sequins on the bodice. I felt quite comfortable at both and I still wear the dress.
I also bought a dark wool coat a couple of years ago because funerals are nearly always cold. I have bright scarves to add if called for.

I have been involved with funerals all my life. So glad it is more relaxed now. Usually you are told black, or a certain colour etc. The funeral to me is not about what I wear but my feelings about the person and finding out about their lives that I never knew. I hope mine is a colourful affair and misery.

sue421

I have been involved with funerals all my life. So glad it is more relaxed now. Usually you are told black, or a certain colour etc. The funeral to me is not about what I wear but my feelings about the person and finding out about their lives that I never knew. I hope mine is a colourful affair and misery.

Sorry meant no misery.

I can't even remember what I wore for my husband's funeral, and have no idea at all what everyone else wore. It was in August, so I may have worn a lightweight black jacket with a white pattern, and black trousers. My oldest friend's husband died during Covid so it was a socially distanced funeral, and hastily arranged so I think we all just wore something easy.

My DH died during covid so there were only a dozen or so people who could come and noone was allowed to sit near eachother or hug!

It was streamed so I can watch it whenever I want to be miserable