Obese Passenger

Wobblybits, I haven't seen your messages because I blocked you. So thank you, and I love the And BlueBelle, thanks too.

I really don't think we're on different sides, any of us. I was just trying to say... Well, never mind, I obviously don't have a way with words

I'm putting my spade away too. Let's all be friends x

That's fine Maggiemaybe I don't want to fall out with anyone over my opinion even when I feel strongly x

To clear something up, I suspect the PM concerned was from myself. However it was not read as I intended and I have since sent two PM apologising. So no one else need feel they are suspect.

Magggie

I don't wish to compound the situation, I'll stop digging my hole.

But as a word of explanation, both My wife and I were bullied at school and early on at work for being overweight (We were only overweight then) so this is a very sensitive subject for both of us. I suspect many overweight people suffered taunts and bullying at school.

Or me! Sorry, BlueBelle, it hadn't occurred to me that people might think the PMs came from you, or I'd have made it clear they didn't. I think I read more into your post than was there. I was feeling a bit sensitive after the first PM. Pax?

My 'journey from hell' was an overnighter from Vancouver to Glasgow. We (DH, DD1 & me) had been stuck in the departure lounge for what seemed like a lifetime as a string of half hour delays were announced. I'm a nervous flier, an addicted smoker and a bit claustrophobic, so being confined and not permitted to return to the designated smoking area was difficult but what made it unbearable was a party of around 20 youths from a well known, respected and exceedingly expensive School, who proceeded to have a game of football between the seating. Although various waiting passengers remonstrated with them (to no effect) there appeared to be no one in charge of them although we had our suspicions about 3 men and a women seated in a corner who appeared to be oblivious to the mayhem.

Eventually we boarded the plane and found ourselves in our little row of 3 with the footballers, in front, behind and to the side of us. As soon as we had taken off and seat belts could be removed, the football appeared and was kicked up and down the aisles and thrown over the passengers heads. By the time the cabin staff had confiscated the ball (and the other one which then appeared) I discovered to my dismay that my 'restless leg' had kicked in so I had to go walk about, forcing my way past the teenagers who were now kneeling in the aisles gambling loudly with cards. I found a quiet space at the back of the plane by the toilets where I could walk on the spot and was soon joined by my DD, who also suffers from restless leg. We had about 10 mins of respite until the tannoy ordered all passengers to return to their seats as we were about to experience turbulence. The stewardess, although sympathetic (her DM had RL) admitted that there was no turbulence - this was merely a ruse to confine the lads to their seats - but we would have to be seated and belted while the light was on. The young gentlemen, unperturbed, started to sing.

So six hours, DD & me, strapped in our seats with 4 legs ( and one arm ) flailing, not even allowed to go to the toilet. DH, in the window seat, slept throughout the night.

Long Haul? Never, ever again

No, neither do I!

Is Iam64 the same poster as Im68now. I dont think so?

By the way although our posts disagreed Maggiemaybe I haven't sent any pms nice or nasty just needed to clear that up for others ....Shame I can't edit my last post to an add on

Iam64 I really am quite shocked at your post Just goes to show how out of touch I am never in my wildest dreams did I think someone would find that funny

And also i m I m not overweight never have been just lucky genes I guess I just can't bear bullying name calling and downright inhumane ignorance whoever it's aimed at weight, disability, colour, creed, sexual orientation, anything we all have a right to be treated with dignity by others

Maggiemay I wasn't suggesting you did consider the Poem ok I was trying to answer your bit about saying ' should we close down all discussions ' I think you took what I said wrongly or maybe I wrote it wrongly but that's what I was referring to not anything about you offending anyone

(neither do I think the OP's 'poem' is remotely funny)

Well, I suppose the assumption is that a lot of obese people have 'brought t on themselves' by overeating, whereas one's skin colour is something you're born with.

I am not saying that's my view about obese people, just pointing out the difference as obieone did ask.

My BMI is 23 if that makes any difference to anything whatsoever.

Maggiemaybe - report your pm if it is offensive or whatever.

The OP, and IM68Now. You have a strange and dare I say it, offensive sense of humour.
Making fun of fat people in general is offensive to lots of fat people reading this thread.
In exactly the same way I would say to people of colour when fun is made of them.
Anyone care to say what the difference is?

Sparkle I very nearly had the same experience last week. Fortunately there was an empty seat which meant my party of 4 could all move along one seat. The large lady next to me was then able to occupy her own seat plus half of mine. Dread to think how uncomfortable it would've been otherwise.
Very unpleasant for your DH!

I really can't remember where it was she went, it may not have been Poland, it could have been the Czech Republic; it was certainly years before they joined the EU, and there was no salad .....

My husband and I went to the theatre and this huge woman sat next to him with her own husband on her other side. My husband was thin and about 10 stone, and took up no room at all but the woman was about 30 stone and sat with her stomach resting on the seat with her enormous legs spread to accommodate it. My husband spent the first half of the performance leaning onto me all the time because of the embarrassment of her thighs pressing on his, and he was most uncomfortable.

At the interval, the woman's husband took my husband aside and said that his wife had complained that my husband's legs were inappropriately touching hers, and accused him of being some sort of pervert. My husband was totally speechless, and in fact we didn't return for the 2nd half of the performance. My husband could have pointed out a few home truths but was too polite to do so, and then seethed with anger and indignation for the rest of the evening.

I am sorry if the huge woman had health issues but both she and her husband were clearly in denial about her size and what it was doing to anyone sitting next to her. How can people be so inconsiderate, and then project the blame onto others? She can get as fat as she likes, I don't care, but why not reserve an end seat so that she can spill out into the aisle?

Theatre seats are expensive but my husband didn't want to let me swap seats with him and suffer the same consequences.

Yes, that's the thing about Poland, Jalima. They do eat lots of dumplings, pancakes, heavy dishes, bread, cakes, beer. So why is their average BMI much lower than ours? Why don't any of their young people sport muffin tops over their jeans (I'm probably offending again, but we honestly didn't see one apart from on the odd tourist)?

I know what your friend felt like - we were only there a week and I was desperate for a glass of red wine (out there it's very much dearer than beer, not good quality and served in 100ml thimbles glasses).

And yes, that surprised us about Australia when we went last year.

Pps perhaps they eat good, healthy, solid but nourishing food but not junk.

Maggiemaybe I remember over 30 years ago a friend went to work in Eastern Europe (can't remember if it was Poland or somewhere else) and she said the first thing she wanted to eat when she got back was a lovely fresh salad - she was utterly sick of sausage, heavy meat dishes with potatoes and rarely fresh green vegetables.

Australia has an obesity problem too - not all are young, bronzed fit beach dudes!

Ps I thought I would share that information instead of sending you a pm

Are you suggesting that poorer people should not be allowed to fly in order to protect the environment TizLiz?

Obviously it must be fine if you're rich and fly all over the world but those of us who can only afford a very occasional short haul foreign holiday should be prevented from doing so.

Getting back to the OP maybe the airlines could consider providing some larger seats (at a fair premium) to those people who may need more room (for whatever reason).

I had yet another MRI scan recently at my local hospital. The scanner there is quite old and very claustrophobic with no music/headphones etc. If I was obese I could have had my scan in a private hospital on the very modern (open) scanner courtesy of the NHS but sadly I am not fat/heavy enough so have to suffer regular claustrophobia.

Of course it's difficult, especially with the many temptations in our way all the time. I've been on the 5:2 diet ever since it came out and probably will be eating those 500 calories two days a week for the rest of my life, as it brought my BMI down into the healthy category and has kept it there. And certainly people with limited mobility have it much harder - I do have experience of that too.

But - no doubt risking more PMs for upsetting somebody - what I'm asking is why are we, in this respect, now one of the biggest countries in Europe? They have the same problems across the population as a whole, after all. We've just come back from Poland and we came across significantly fewer overweight people out there. They're certainly not stinting at meal times, and there's a lot of beer drinking going on. Perhaps they don't eat between meals, perhaps they walk about more. I don't know, but surely we should be asking the questions, without people getting offended?

I find it very sad that nobody seems to have actually talked to this rather obese gentleman but just made fun of him. I have never been obese but if I had any sort of problem that I thought might inconvenience other passengers, I would be up front about it, apologise and talk to the cabin crew and fellow passengers to see if there might be a solution in order to make the flight more comfortable for everybody.

Why are we bigger than previously? Are more people ill? I suspect it is because there are more excuses now than there used to be.

When standing in the supermarket queue with nothing else to do I can't help looking at what is on the conveyor belt in front of me. From that I can look up and have a rough idea of what shape the person in front of me is. I seem to usually be right.

If I have a pint jug and pour 1 1/2 pints of water into it some will overflow. It is the same with our bodies, they expand if we overfill them. Research has been done which shows that people who think they don't overeat almost invariably do when the actual intake is monitored.

If a person chooses to eat more than their body uses that is up to them unless by so doing they have an effect on another person apart, of course, from parents who have to responsibility to teach their children to eat well.

Enforced immobility for a few weeks may mean I gain weight although I am trying to eat less; difficult because we don't eat junk food or consume sugary drinks anyway and I am relying on someone else to do the food preparation.

It's catch 22 - if you have limited mobility for whatever reason, it is difficult to maintain a lower weight and BMI, which may then lead to increased immobility and more weight gain.

But I suppose we should just help ourselves [sigh]

Speaking from bitter experience, and as a relatively slim person all my life, I can confirm, as can many others, that getting, and staying slim is no picnic. It's hard and relentless. For many, a battle never won.

And whilst I agree broadly with the mantra Eat Less, Move More, support from the powers that be is lacking when it comes down to it. How much less? How much more?

Even the most disciplined amongst us waver; given the poor, and quite often frankly wrong, advice; the ubiquity of food, and particularly sugary food and snacks, it's a wonder that anyone's slim! Add in mental health problems and other environmental factors, together with poor education and, yes, a lack of willpower and bingo!

And as for the airlines..squished seating has ensured that many more can fly. Which is a good thing. It's still possible to avoid the madding crowd, but that privilege comes at a price.

And there's the rub.

Elegran not everyone expects cheap travel to the ends of the earth just for a vacation, for many of us it is the only way we can get to see our families, and for many others it is for work and business.

wobbly I suppose technically you must be obese if that is what the guidelines state, but at 6 ft, 17 stone with big shoulders you sound like the rugby gent who sat next to me for a 13 hour journey. It would have been nice to fall asleep on his shoulder but he fell asleep on mine, I hadn't got the heart to shove him off, managed to wriggle out and lean on DH instead. I wouldn't have said he was obese.
I must be technically obese too, average size for a British woman, but I do have quite bony shoulders so he can't have been that comfortable.

I think the OP is referring to 'morbidly obese', enforced intimacy with people you don't know because the seats in cattle class are just too narrow.

There must have been a nicer way of putting it.