We would like to move to Spain but...

I’m not in your situation, but you might be pleasantly surprised, they might look forward to holidays with you. It might be an idea though to consider what impact Brexit might have on your move. I have heard that people who had registered in Spain before our Brexit vote should be ok, but I don’t know what will happen to new incomers.

Hi daisy I've never been in this situation, but for me the clue lies in the fact that you are dreading having the conversation. That shouldn't be the case or are your childcare duties taken for granted?

Surely after 10 years the conversation should be along the lines of I've got XX number of years left (if I'm lucky) to enjoy life, I've looked after the children for the past 10 years, so I'm off now to do something else. See ya!

I'm definitely in the "I've had my turn camp ..." excluding people who really need help with child care due to circumstances beyond their control of course.

I think it can be a huge mistake to move when you get older unless you are fluent in Spanish. My aunt was very ill in Spain and eventually died there but the language difficulties made things very difficult for her. It may be ok if you can afford two homes _ one there and one back in the UK. Think very carefully

My first post. We have just returned after 14 years in Spain. It's a wonderful life and I'm sure you will enjoy it. My daughter wasn't particularly happy when we went even though she had moved (for work reasons) 100 miles away to London. However, we had fantastic family visits with the family and the grandchildren. We probably saw as much of the, overall, as if we had been in the UK. The kids loved coming over with the pool etc. She did once admit to me that she felt 'abandoned'. This at 35 years old!

I say go for it. Flights are cheap, it is a very healthy climate and your family will enjoy their holidays in the sun.

We nearly moved to France 10 years or so ago - I am so glad we didn't as OH got PD and the proximity of loving family has been everything to us.

Also we did not want to tie our family in to having holidays with us in France each year when they might fancy a trip to China or wherever.

I can’t comment on moving abroad Daisy but in the last 6 months we have moved away from our children and grandchildren . Not a million miles but significantly more than the 10 mins away.

We too were heavily involved in childcare. Our youngest daughter made quite a lot of fuss , and we actually postponed the move for a year for her to get used to it.

With the value of hindsight , I can honestly say it was one of the best things we’ve done . It’s surprising how quickly everyone has come to terms with the distance and the changes we’ve had to make.

We do have to put effort in to go back , some hotel stays and we’ve had the little ones here for longer stays .

In fact I would say we’ve almost seen more of them since the move, less drop ins for coffee more longer stays.

I say, if it’s your dream- go for it . If not now - then when IS your time ?

Best of luck .

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We did it - but to a different warm country. It was heaven.

My adult daughter was upset at first - and my mum - however they did realise that [just as I did with them] in life you need to give people the freedom to choose what they want to do - and its not always about sacrificing yourself for the sake of your family.

4 years later though we are splitting up and selling up - our relationship was not a match made in heaven - but I'm still glad we did it. It was such an adventure and I shall miss the wonderful warmth of the sun when I am back in the UK.

Not Spain, but Wales. A move from London to beautiful rural Wales was encouraged by my older daughter and my son approved, but the youngest - who was expecting me to continue as unpaid babysitter till the end of time - has not stopped whining about it yet!

Don't ask the family what they think - tell them what YOU have decided to do for your own happiness and to fulfill your own dreams.

After all - it's the chances for happiness that we didn't take that we'll regret at the end.

Friends moved to EU country 4yrs ago to be with offspring and grandchildren. Two yrs after Brexit, they still don't understand their position. Please find out before moving. Apologies if this sounds negative.

DH and I have watched a few episodes of an afternoon tv programme about people who go somewhere warm for two or three months in the Winter. I think that would be wonderful - the family could come and visit during the school holidays but we wouldn’t be away for ever. Perhaps try that first and see if you want to do the full move?

Daisydoo2 if you can accept the wrench from your family who you have clearly been very involved with, then go and don't let the conversation you are dreading have any bearing on your decision. However, you should not assume that they will share your precise dream which includes them coming to holiday with you - they may not want to do that, they may want to ring the changes as their school holiday time is precious, and fitting in short visits at half-term to do the dutiful thing is very expensive as air fares escalate at school holiday times. So go if you want to, but don't think it will be the ideal as it may well not be and you may end up seeing far less of your grandchildren than you want.

I hope you enjoy Spain, but please rent property and don't buy until you know whether Brexit will make it impossible for you to stay in Spain.

Do learn Spanish if you don't already speak it. It is not a difficult language to learn and the Spaniards will love you for having made the effort.

Do you know that estimates from tradesmen are only binding if notarized at the office of the public notary?

We dreamed of Spain too, but have had to give up the idea, as we would have to pay income tax both in Spain and in Denmark.

Does it have to be a permanent move.? Why not purchase a small apartment ?use it when you want and keep your UK property Whatever the outcome of Brexit you wont have burnt your bridges and still have the security of your UK property.Happy family faces all round.

Have been bringing up my gd for the last 10 years. She will be 18 in October and will receive a good cash sum of money in respect of her fathers death (our son) she wants to travel I would love to move to suffolk my d has said we should go.
She lives round the corner from us and is very encouraging but I know I will miss her dreadfully she been such a great help and support over the years. My husband is not keen said he is too old to move again. At a crossroads in my life.

Buying property abroad does sound a political minefield as mentioned by others, and of course there will be a huge emotional wrench for all concerned. We are all different but I personally couldn’t bear to be too far away from my bunch..... but I can empathise that at times it’s a harsh choice by wanting to follow your own dreams. Is there a compromise, 6 week breaks in Spain, 2 or 3 times a year ? Not expensive hotels of course, but there are lots of cheaper self catering options. Having the best of both worlds maybe ? Whatever you decide, hope it works out for you.

Our grandchildren got to school age and we took off to southern France. We had a few wonderful years in the sunshine and family visited often. Ryanair cut the winter flights so we only saw family in summer. Circumstances in the UK changed, our previously childless youngest son and his wife started a family and another son went through a messy divorce leaving him with childcare problems so we sold up and came home. We’ve been able to help where necessary but now they all say they miss the lovely sunny CHEAP holidays, the pool and being abroad.
So do we! Do what makes you happy and they’ll be happy too, even if it’s not apparent immediately.
As far as Brexit goes I’d get some advice unless you’re a risk taker, in which case go for it.

Please follow your dream. Don't look back and wonder 'what if'. It would be very selfish of your daughter to object just because she is loosing her baby sitter. Enjoy your adventure. X

Just read a few of the previous posts. There is a prog on the BBC at the moment about renting in the sun for the winter months. Might be worth looking at.... It is daytime tv

If THEY decided to move, would they consider YOUR wish for them to remain if the position were reversed?
There lies your answer.

Have you thought about a long-term rental Daisydoo2? There are some amazingly cheap ones if you search the property pages.
We moved to northern France 13 years ago, one of our children lives with his family in Spain and another in the UK. It isn’t always easy but on the whole it has been very positive for us. It was harder when the grandchildren were small but is much easier now they are older. We skype regularly, help with homework via Facetime and Messenger and have a close relationship with both families. They don’t always want to spend their holidays here and that is fine, we pop over to England regularly and see the Spanish family in Spain, England or here.
Learning the language is important though we have spent many holidays in Spain and seen how people manage with no Spanish at all in the places where there are huge communities of British, Scandinavians, French etc.
I think Brexit worries all of us and I would avoid buying property for a permanent move at the moment. Our income has been cut by 20% since the Brexit vote because of the slump in the pound.
If I were you I would hang on to your UK property and rent in Spain until you are certain it will work and the post-Brexit arrangements are clearer.

Go for it. Don't buy in Spain. Ten years ago I wanted to sell up and go to live in Spain. Husband said no way. Our compromise was a caravan in Spain. Not luxury mobile home...Normal 18 feet with sunshade.
On a small rural campsite. Good toilet block smells of bleach ( haha) swimming pool. The van not the pool we use it possibly 4/5 months of the year Very reasonable storage and great nightly rate . Our own bed to sleep . In the warm weather you do everything outside and in winter caravan very easy and inexpensive to heat. I am so Blessed having my own wee rehab centre. Do research bite the bullet.

Gosh I think it is mad to sell up and buy in Spain or any foreign country when you are reaching pensionable age.
I have friends who would love to come back but can't because they will not be able to buy a house in the Uk now as there is such adifference in price.
Just go and rent somewhere and let your own house in the UK out.
You really need to understand the Tax laws in Spain. If one of you dies, then Tax has to be paid up front. Partners do not inherit automatically in Spain when one dies.

We have recently returned to the UK after living in France for 17 years. We returned to see more of our family, and because we were getting older with some health problems, and rural France was not the best place for that. We do miss the weather, our pool and frequent holidays from family, but we are very glad we had the experience.
Please consider very carefully before buying in Spain. Their property laws can be complex, and as others have said, expats are not sure what their status will be after Brexit. Why not rent to start with? Also consider the language; if you are not fluent in Spanish then there may be difficulties, especially in the case of illness.
If you do decide to go for it then I am sure it will be a huge adventure. Good luck.