Long Lost Family: Born Without Trace.

Is this the 'poor woman' who had a long standing affair with a married man ?

My husband was adopted ( I hate the expression given up for adoption) until you know the whole story it is impossible to judge.

My husband and his birth mother were he first mother and child to be reunited In 2006 under a new law that allowed birth parents to search for their children.

We have lived the story, it was an emotional rollercoaster, a bittersweet voyage of discovery and not something we as a family would ever wish to repeat.

I found it strange that each of the abandoned children were left in tartan duffle type bags, six years apart, and in different parts of the country certainly, but the police didn’t make any connection.

My DH pointed out however, that we are talking about the 1960’s, and communications and information would not be shared as it is nowadays.

I used to work in a maternity hospital many many years ago as a social worker.

There were several occasions where we had to find accommodation for girls in another part of the country in order to prevent them from serious harm. This was partly cultural. Certain ethnic minority girls would tell us that their fathers would "kill them" if they knew they were pregnant - they meant it literally, so we had to find ways to ensure their safety.

I too watched the programme, to abandon one baby in this way is terrible, but to abandon two is just horrendous. It's just so sad that the mother couldn't find a way to give the children up for adoption rather than to just leave them for someone to find. The mother was in her 30s when she had the first baby, so not a teenage girl. On reflection, I do think that she must have known the father was married/unavailable, why else would she give up her babies? You would presume therefore, that she was a single parent. The whole story was so sad, and the fact that the mother never had any more children is just heartbreaking. I just hope that the decision to abandon her 2 children was hers alone and she was not coerced by her married partner who had the luxury of keeping all 14 of his children.

At least six years is a long time to wait for a proposal of
marriage, unless it wasn’t a relationship but two meetings six
years apart.

That was a very grand grave that the mother had. Maybe she came from quite an influential local family, who even now, still want to keep it quiet. I wonder what the mothers life was before she met him. I assume she left that small village life and moved to Dublin, where she met him.

I've just always assumed that the mother of a foundling child would be a young, frightened girl with no one to turn to.
Last night's programme (and tonight's) show quite a different situation. I must say, I was quite surprised to find the mothers were in their 30's and, in tonight's programme, married with older children.

One of last night’s babies was born in 1962, and not sure if both tonight’s were about the same time.
Strange how these abandoned children were born at similar times.
Did no one notice these women were pregnant, and wonder what happened to the babies they had?

When my son was in SCBU in the 80's ,there was a baby in another room who was being adopted.His mother had had an affair and her husband was prepared to carry on with their marriage as long as she didn't bring the baby home.She used to sneak down to SCBU to visit him during the week she was in after her c section.I felt so sad for her .People make mistakes ,its not the childs fault I often wonder if the marriage survived and where the wee boy went .
I see some on here still blame the mother"one mistake is acceptable but to let it happen twice" Really? Unless you know all the circumstances you cant either apportion blame or judge .It DOES take two!

Shocking program again tonight. I just can’t get my head around it all and I was a very young and frightened 18 year old mum .

I've missed this. What channel is it on, please?

It was ITV marelli . Shown over 2 nights (Monday and Tuesday ) I found it quite upsetting .

The mother paid a very heavy price for her affair. Not so the father who had all his children in his life. As they are not still here to explain or defend their actions we shouldn't judge them too harshly. I'm sure 1960s Ireland was a very different time and place.

Thanks, gillybob. I think I'll likely feel the same as you, though.

Posters seem to be judging this by the more modern standards of a different culture.
This was the Republic of Ireland in the 1960s, a very different place than today. There was no divorce.
We don't know what had happened in this man's marriage.

Perhaps the mother of the two children truly loved him - it was said in the programme that she had been seen with him just before he died and that some of his children knew about her but not the babies, so it was a longstanding affair.
She must have been desperate but I do think it was sad that he perhaps did not support her more.

It is wonderful that brother and sister have now met.

I have a younger cousin who was adopted as a newborn by my aunt and uncle. Sadly her adoptive mother then died when she was 4 years old.

She decided to trace her birth mother in her 20’s. A longing that became stronger when she became a mother herself.

Her birth mother agreed to meet up with her. She had been single and unsupported by the father and gave her up for adoption.

25 years on she was married to another man and had 2 more daughters and none of them were aware of her past and she had no intention of telling them.

The meeting ended on a “don’t contact me I’ll contact you” basis. Sadly my cousin agreed to that to avoid the risk of her husband and daughters finding out and she never heard from her birth mother again.

It was a double rejection for her.

I watched last night's showing and came here to see your reactions
I found it quite emotional and sad. Touching that cornedbeef baby continued to live in the same house incase his morher came looking for him!
I'll bet she came to see how he was getting on.

It was, and still is in some cultures, thought best for the child to be brought up by others who can give him more than you can.
One of Jane Austen's brothers was informally adopted by a rich family, distant rellies? and he became very successful and a benefactor.

That's a poignant story about your cousin Grannynannywanny.
Have any of you read Nicky Campbell's own story? It's a gripping tale.

Grammaretto no I’m not familiar with Nicky Campbell’s story. I will have a read.

When my cousin met up with her birth mother it was such a crushing disappointment. She left her husband and baby at another nearby cafe to have the initial reunion just the 2 of them.

Her intention was to then take her birth mother round the corner to meet her husband and baby. But she declined to meet them.

Paddyanne I was not exonerating the biological father, this was an extra marital affair that went on for some time not some young naive girl and immature youth.

I actually wonder how many candidates they have set up for the programme, cynic that I am. After all it's popular television so if they came across incest or worse it would have to be sorry but your story is just too awful. Then there would be yet another rejection.

I had my DNA tested last year partly to solve my own family legend once and for all. My Gf was allegedly the son of a wealthy landowner, who could take his pick of his serfs, but was brought up by the girl's parents as her little brother.
Anyway I found it is perfectly true and my closest relations are cousins through the landowner.
However, these new cousins are not interested in meeting me!
I realised that I did meet my gt aunt without knowing she was really my gt grandmother. She must have known. Strange isn't it.

Is it possible to watch this again or do we need to pay?

foundlingvoices.foundlingmuseum.org.uk/index.html

from the foundling museum london! Voices of people who were foundlings.

Grammaretto, I don´t live in the UK but I watched both parts on Youtube, the quality is not great, but watchable.

back in the day we wore loose clothing when pregnant so in many cases it was hardly noticable that you were about to give birth!!