Kate Garraway and her husband

I think he is well enough at times, for brief periods, to make his wishes known.

You must have seen something I haven't as he didn't seem able to communicate much from what I saw. I think communicating pain seemed to be the main thing. Was he able to express himself from what you saw?

People can be supported to make their wishes known even if they lack mental capcity. I'm pretty sure itv operates within an ethical framework where this kind of thing is concerned.

I don't follow the family much, apart from in passing, if something is shown on tv and it happens to be on.

The last time I saw was Kate talking about him, and she seemed to infer that very occasionally he was "with it" a bit more.
I don't know if that is perhaps what she wants to see, though?
He still requires an enormous amount of care, but that doesnt mean he can't communicate.

Look, he's devastated by COVID. He can't really move, his communication is very minimal.

This was Kate's comment at the end of May.

Apparently he sleeps 20 hours a day. I doubt he's going to get anywhere near back to a normal life.

It is a living nightmare for them all and if it helps Kate to talk about, that's fine by me.

I think we all know our loved ones well enough to think about whether they are ok with us revealing things about them, even on here.
I'm very mindful of what my daughter would have been happy with, much as I long to post her photo, just so everyone could see how beautiful she was.
I will never go into details about certain things, because i know.

Zoejory

*Look, he's devastated by COVID. He can't really move, his communication is very minimal.*

This was Kate's comment at the end of May.

Apparently he sleeps 20 hours a day. I doubt he's going to get anywhere near back to a normal life.

It is a living nightmare for them all and if it helps Kate to talk about, that's fine by me.

I think her talking about how it affects her and the children is one thing, filming him is different as if he hasn't agreed to it then it is a terrible invasion of his privacy. If she tells us he sleeps 20 hours a day and has communication problems isn't that enough, do we need to witness it? It seems very voyeuristic to me and I felt uncomfortable about watching it. I wouldn't watch another documentary about him but I think her talking about how she's coping and brief details of how he is is fine. I'm a very private person so I am looking at it from what I'd want.

She seems a lovely woman but she is very extrovert, he seems a quieter personality so might feel differently to her. I'd be horrified at the thought of people filming me if I was in his condition.

I'm sure your family know that about you?
There are people who find it helpful to blog about their cancer, from beginning to the very end.
There are plenty on youtube doing exactly that.

GrannyGravy13

flaxwoven if by milking it for all its worth you mean keeping Covid, long Covid and it’s many components in the public domain I say well done Kate.

She has a home to keep (mortgage and all the associated bills) childcare, round the clock care for Derek, so if she makes some money from her book I say well done Kate.

I agree GrannyGravy and I'm sure she is aware of how her husband feels about the book. The Schumachers are not in any sort of financial need although of course that does not change what they have suffered.
I think Kate G has and is doing the best she can for her husband and family.

GrannyGravy13

flaxwoven if by milking it for all its worth you mean keeping Covid, long Covid and it’s many components in the public domain I say well done Kate.

She has a home to keep (mortgage and all the associated bills) childcare, round the clock care for Derek, so if she makes some money from her book I say well done Kate.

GG13 I totally agree Derek has lost his ability to earn the living he was earning before he took ill and Kate G has to manage all the finances and look after their children's future she is doing what is best for her family.

I admire Kate Galloway for the way she is handling what has happened to her beloved husband.

I don't have to read the book or watch a documentary if I don't want to.
Perhaps those objecting just don't like to know too much about other peoples suffering?
We can choose whether or not to take any notice but Kate and Derek's family have not choice other than to live with the outcome of this awful Virus.

flaxwoven what an absolutely awful sour thread opener

flaxwoven Kate Garraway is the only bread winner in her family now. She has a severely disabled husbandwhom she clearly loves dearly and whose care costs must be astronomical, two school age children and probably a mortgage. She is a professional broadcaster.

What do you think she should do? Put her husband in care, sell the house and live on the pickings she can find or, as she has chosen to do to care for her husband, try and keep a stable home for her children while she works her socks off in everyway she can to keep the wagon on the road. Sadly, her husbands plight is of interest to other people, potential programmes are there, and I am sure she finds this need to exploit her family circumstances difficult.

But needs must when the devil drives.

MissAdventure

I'm sure your family know that about you?
There are people who find it helpful to blog about their cancer, from beginning to the very end.
There are plenty on youtube doing exactly that.

But that is their choice.

pinkquartz

I admire Kate Galloway for the way she is handling what has happened to her beloved husband.

I don't have to read the book or watch a documentary if I don't want to.
Perhaps those objecting just don't like to know too much about other peoples suffering?
We can choose whether or not to take any notice but Kate and Derek's family have not choice other than to live with the outcome of this awful Virus.

The point isn't that you don't have to watch the programme but if he would want you to have access to him when he is in such a vulnerable state.

Would your family be confident to know your choices?
I'm convinced mine would, as I think I'm safe to say I know theirs.

M0nica

flaxwoven Kate Garraway is the only bread winner in her family now. She has a severely disabled husbandwhom she clearly loves dearly and whose care costs must be astronomical, two school age children and probably a mortgage. She is a professional broadcaster.

What do you think she should do? Put her husband in care, sell the house and live on the pickings she can find or, as she has chosen to do to care for her husband, try and keep a stable home for her children while she works her socks off in everyway she can to keep the wagon on the road. Sadly, her husbands plight is of interest to other people, potential programmes are there, and I am sure she finds this need to exploit her family circumstances difficult.

But needs must when the devil drives.

Someone as unwell as him should have NHS funding for continuing care.

MissAdventure

Would your family be confident to know your choices?
I'm convinced mine would, as I think I'm safe to say I know theirs.

You might know on the other hand you might be wrong. Now if you are fit and well you might think you wouldn't mind a documentary about you, you might feel differently if you were lying there so different to the person you once were.

GG13 I totally agree Derek has lost his ability to earn the living he was earning before he took ill and Kate G has to manage all the finances and look after their children's future she is doing what is best for her family. Great, he's lost the ability to make a living so sell him to the highest bidder, invade his privacy he can't work so who cares.

I absolutely know without any doubt that I would not want to blog about an illness.
Not now, not at the beginning or end of my illness or struggles.
That isnt going to change.
It's how I am.

JaneJudge

Josianne, you highlight what I mentioned. Society expects carers to behave in a certain way. Well, we are all different and we are allowed to behave however we want to behave and cope in whichever manner that helps. It's about time these unrealistic expectations on carers and people in general going through tough times, stopped.

Some people find that sharing their problems and their grief is therapeutic and helps them through the difficulties they face every day.

Others find it difficult to express their feelings and to share, they are naturally more reticent and private.

Kate is a journalist and this is what she does. If she can keep the devastating effects of Covid in the public eye that is all to the good.

MissAdventure

I absolutely know without any doubt that I would not want to blog about an illness.
Not now, not at the beginning or end of my illness or struggles.
That isnt going to change.
It's how I am.

I wouldn't either. I'm a very private person, no way would I be posting about personal matters other than on an anonymous site. If I was unable to object and someone put films of me on TV or social media I'd come back and haunt them.

Kate is a journalist and this is what she does. If she can keep the devastating effects of Covid in the public eye that is all to the good. She's good with words, no need to film the poor man. If feels like a Victorian freak show, roll up roll up come and see what covid does.

MissAdventure

I absolutely know without any doubt that I would not want to blog about an illness.
Not now, not at the beginning or end of my illness or struggles.
That isnt going to change.
It's how I am.

I wouldn't either, but we're all different. The thought of a support group and everyone sharing their experiences does not appeal to me at all.

I dont see Derek as a freak.
He is someone devastated by a virus we are apparently all going to catch.
He is a dad, husband, but never a freak.