Judthepud2
My whole family (14) will be here for Christmas apart from 1 SIL who is working. This includes 6 children: 10 - 1. My problem is that I always feel responsible for the happiness of each and every one of the family which means I run myself ragged. There is such pressure for Christmas to be 'perfect'.
This year, I can feel a couple of issues developing amongst some of my children. How can I distance myself from this and not get upset if there are disagreements?
It can be very tough as a mum not to try to smooth everything over - to make things right. But the fact is whilst you can have influence over your own relationships with people - you have no control and influence over their relationships with each other. Even when they are your children. Intervening in their squabbles might have been easy when they were kids - but it's not easy or appropriate now. Try not to take sides. Model kind, caring and compassionate behaviour and hope they will be adult and respectful enough to behave - particularly on your territory. Don't be afraid to point out that their arguments risk ruining your Christmas. State this calmly and without judgement. It might well be enough to make them think.