Very angry about this!!

Sel, agreed that being a non native English speaker can cause confusion with some words. I know only too well as my mother-tongue is French and my second language German. However, if Cathy had read the thread properly, there would have been no confusion as earlier posts made it perfectly clear what was being talked about.

granjura yes I agree and I don't know if I am correct about cathy. I did check back on the other thread and she did say she was 'from the Med' She might be a mermaid for all I know I just thought the term 'whistleblower' might be confusing for her as she'd likened it to a 'grass' which it most emphatically is not.

I think that confusion is in many people's minds and that is what makes it so difficult for whistle blowers.

I don't know quite why it is difficult. There is a difference between being loyal to friends on the one hand and keeping quiet about a dangerous or exploitative way of doing business on the other.

If friends are doing business that way, I would think hard about whether they are people I really want to be friends with.

I mean I don't see why it is difficult for others to distinguish between them.

Why distinguish? 'Grassing up' a friend or relative who has done something horrendous is not a bad thing, despite the criminal culture's rule of 'no grassing.' When there's a risk thy will do it again if no-one stops them, grassing is a responsible thing to do.

Very different from telling on your friend for smoking or pinching apples. It's a matter of degree.

When harm is being done that needs to be stopped, grassing is the right thing to do, as is whistle-blowing on an organisation that is doing harm.

I have the greatest admiration for mothers/parents who actually turn a son or daughter in if they refuse to take responsibility for a serious crime. The hardest thing to do - but I think I would if the crime for serious.

Same with friends, being loyal, oh yes. I am the loyalest of friends - but if they committed a serious crime, I'd encourage them to give themselves up to police - and if not, I'd have no hesitation but to give info to police myself. This loyalty can go too far - see what happened with Jimmy Saville and co - and other cases where loyal wives closed a blind eye to child abuse, etc.

Message deleted by Gransnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

Dear HQ by deleting my post and no one else's I feel that you ARE definitly taking sides as one can not banter alone and you have now deleted 2 of my post's. I would very much appreciate an explanation Thank you

Poor Frida !Her original posting has led to a lot of angst.

I soooo agree Gorki

Quite - Frida, thinking of you and so glad you are now able to put this behind you. I certainly do admire anybody who has the guts to whistleblow when others are at risk. BRAVO.

Cathy, no idea why your latest post was deleted. You are indeed entitled to your opinion, always - but if it was expressed as a personal and very rude attack again, then I am glad GN has deleted it. I have btw NOT reported your previous post to me- as it is water over a duck's back for me.

Agree, when granjura If a friend or relative is doing something mildly antisocial, then direct disapproval is the first reaction. If they are doing something dangerous or unethical, they need the whistle blown on them.

When in a hole..............

Congratulations on finally being acknowledged as right, Frida. It must feel remarkably fine

Cathy - I am sure that people did not intend to undermine your right to your own opinion on the subject. Many people feel as you do, which is one of the reasons that people like Frida are given such a rough ride when they feel obligated to report something. However, from your posts elsewhere you seem to be a caring person and I feel sure that you also would report if you saw people being placed at risk?

Personally, I wish everyone felt able to applaud when someone stands up to highlight any serious malpractice, wherever it occurs...... but human nature is a strange beastie.

Inthe fields <realises she should have read entire thread before commenting, and retreats into her hole again>

Just wanted to say AGAIN that I have explained myself, I was not aware exactly what whistle blower meant, my understanding of it was that you snitch on friends. So apologies if I have offended anyone as it was not my intention as said I was not fully aware what whistleblower meant.

Thanks. However, if a friend or friends were guilty of a serious crime or fraud, I would 'snitch' on them. There are huge problems in some communities with unsolved serious crimes, because nobody will 'snitch' - leaving the weak and vulnerable totally at risk.