To leave the room

gracesmum we are doing lots of things together on his days off now , even taking trips away which has been great but its the other days (can't be doing something every day off) , but I guess you are right I just am used to a quiet house and have to accept that watching daytime tv is one of the many things OH likes to do and not let it annoy me. a period of adjustment is required . In the Summer he'll be out playing bowls during the day and I can choose to go along and yawn watch or not.

Greatnan

Are you sitting comfortably, I agree with you. Blimey.

tanith.

When you say you do go out together and you share chores etc., then I think your not doing too bad surely. What does he do when you are knitting, on the computer or reading? Or do you only do such activities when he puts the tele on.

I am sure this thread is meant tongue in cheek but remember one day you might wish on wish he was there with the tele on day or night. Until then keep taking the tablets as they say.

I agree, tanith - there's nothing I want to watch on tv in the daytime, I'm not sniffy about the habit. Besides, I'm working four days a week and would rather listen to the radio when I am at home during the day.
A few years ago OH would watch the soaps with me in the evening, but these days he prefers repeats of Poirot or New Tricks, so I leave him to it and go to the other room where I can switch between the tv and the laptop at my leisure!

As I live alone in a very isolated place, the tv is usually the only English voice I hear from one week to the next apart from my daughter's phone calls - but I really do enjoy the programmes I watch.

The constant chatter of mechanical voice noise and jangles from radio or TV would drive me insane very fast! I don't know how people bear it. DH used to think (well he probably still does think) I'm just very weird, but it's yet another side effect of ME hypersensitivity to noise. Also light. And smells. So I'm not quite as bonkers as he thinks. (Not quite!).

Obviously, we all have different needs and we meet them the best way we can. I don't expect other people to like what I like nor do I feel I need to justify my life choices.

so sympathise!! If we having quick rest I mean I want to look at papers and have doze maybe if we going out that night, but OH wants news on and programmes like The Chase which I do not enjoy.

He been retired 2 years now and we still adjusting!!

The strain of our family situation causes enormous tension and conflicts, and if we have bad bust up he blames me for the rift.

On the whole we enjoy each others company and have taken up folk dancing!! with couple good friends and it is such a laugh.
We also go out a lot to dances and weekends away belong to 2 social clubs with our friends.
There is need for adjustment somehow, give and take, I still go out with girl friends for lunches and OH still works one day a week, being pharmacist he is well sought after, but it gives us both a break. I go to acquacise twice a week but he does not have any hobbies other than home and garden, he has decorated s room and d room since retirement and we planned it together was great fun.
hope you find some middle ground!!

It's quite a relief to learn that other Gnetters aren't necessarily snuggled up on the sofa with their OHs every evening! I did have a bit of a niggly feeling that OH and I were a bit odd watching tv separately sometimes!

My DH loves the TV on and puts it on when he is home. It is also his default suggestion when DGC come round.'do you want to watch CBeebies?'. He often uses his laptop simultaneously.

I tend to be more selective .. choosing particular programmes I want to see rather than watching the best of not much!

I am lucky as I am able to 'switch off' so can read/GN/FB/sew /work etc even with TV/radio on so can share space with DH & TV!

Sometimes we do actually sit and watch an old B & W movie together or a DVD from Lovefilm.

I find his TV watching preferable to his attempts at housework! He tries hard but really is not very good at it and I find that infuriating but not sure why! I hate housework and only do what is essential but I do a thorough job when I eventually do it!

DH retired two years before I did so he got used to watching a bit of daytime TV. I was so knackered after working until nearly 65 that I was only too happy to crash out in front of 'Escape To The Country' now and again.
We've fallen into a bit of a pattern now. The only telly we watch during the day is the lunchtime news while we're having a snack and the afternoon quizzes which the DGCs tease us about even though they love Pointless. We work outside a lot as we have a smallholding but if the weather is crap wet and windy the telly goes on and we put our feet up

Only daytime TV allowed in our house is CBeebies, and that is strictly rationed. Have had a TV installed in the spare bedroom and if MrDogs wants to watch something special he can go up there.
Has this simply become a habit? Habits can be broken and better ones re-learned. Doesn't he have hobbies, or friends to visit, or places to go? Perhaps you could start by going out somewhere new together once a week. You say he has 'nothing to occupy him' so point out what a boring old fart man he has become in no uncertain terms!

I dont see anything wrong with the poor man watching daytime TV. If hes not long retired then he is still probably at a loss as to what his role in the house now is.Does he have no hobbies ,or perhaps discover hobbies you can do together. My OH is retired but loves gardening,but inevitably he will have TV or radio on to keep up with the news.

tanith send him round to grannygrace's house!

I didn't realise it was so bad to watch TV! Thank goodness I have nobody dictating to me how to spend my time.

it has been said that the TV is the 'flickering fire' in our fireless rooms

We have a fire AND a flickering TV. Long Live Retirement

Each to their own! But that can be a problem when there's more than one of you sharing a smallish home...which is where we came in!

He does have hobbies and we do things together as I've already said , I was complaining about those other days when we aren't doing something more interesting , our house is small and I can't get away from the tv noise unless I go out or upstairs.. I've already said in a later post that I'll not complain about it anymore and just be grateful he's around to moan at. Greatnan its not bad to watch it if that's what you like, but I objected to being inflicted with it when I don't like.
I am now never going to moan at the poor man again when he puts on the tv in the daytime. I'll just occupy myself elsewhere.

Good job we like the same things then. Last Sunday we were balancing plates of scrambled eggs on our knees watching the repeat of Great British Bake Off....Second childhood maybe?

Yessss, merlot a fire......
So very comforting.
I don't think I could live without my little woodburner.
It is what scares me about downsizing. Not having it anymore.

As my old mother used to say: Just as well people still have real fires. Else there would be even more divorces and separations.
Well, that was her logic anyway.

Not downsizing ... yet.

Don't worry about downsizing, johanna. Plenty of small homes have woodburners.

Wow! Where did dictating come from? When there are two or more people sharing one living area then there has to be compromise. Why should tanith have to take herself off like a refugee in her own house so the poor wee man can get his own way all the time?
It would be a completely different matter if they both enjoyed daytime TV, but that's not the case.

I must admit that I find it all too easy to get hooked on daytime TV if I have nothing better to do. That's why I have joined a gym. Don't laugh.

I agree, Nanad, that was the point I was making too. It's fine if you live alone, but two or more have to work out how to live together without getting on each other's nerves. I have every sympathy with you, tanith.

I do wish that lighthearted questions didn't turn into something else all the time... it was a light and fluffy question ladies , I'm not about divorce my happy chappy.
I'd love to have our gas flame effect fire on all the time but I'm frightened about how much gas it'll use... maybe we should swop it for a wood burner then I could send him out to chop down trees...