How the rich get richer

The Shugborough estate is only an hour from Leicester, and it's massive.
Djen I used to live near there; DN got married there. His Lordship was in residence at the time and some of the guests got told off for walking in front of his windows and spoiling the view for his guests!!
Sudbury is lovely as well, visited there earlier this year.

Twice DH and I have set out to visit a NT property and found either when we arrived or en route when I checked the handbook that these properties were closed on certain days.
Always best to check first

We used to do opera evenings in country houses, with a buffet. One house was a wonderful old place, dating back to the eleventh century, and the family had lived there almost as long. When the concert was over the lady of the house rolled up her sleeves and got straight into the washing up (A great rarity among the houses we went to) She helped us with all the clearing up and packing all our stuff up and was very keen to see that no extra work was left for the house keeper. And, of course, the house was full of worn old furniture and dog blankets, with the obligatory battered old Volvo estate in the garage.

Very 'nouveau riche' attitude, that boasting about money. People who have been born into old money tend not to flash it about.

Some years ago DH and I were staying with friends in the South of France and intending to go to the Monaco Grand Prix. They had a pair of friends who had just sailed their yacht over from Cornwall to Cannes and who spent the evening telling us about the yacht and showing off the wife's jewellery. When we said we were getting a lift to Monte Carlo to see the race they said "Oh don't do that! It's such a rip off! Everything's so expensive, the price of food is daylight robbery!" We went any way, paid 20euros each to watch the race and found you could get perfectly good filled baguettes from a van for a couple of euros - and it was fun! Fun didn't seem to feature in this couple's life.

WhenI was endurance riding my pony was the hairy type and however hard I tried he never looked smart and frequently dripped mud. I reckoned then that my place in life was to make other people feel better about themselves. It never bothered me as I often had the last laugh.

Maybe that is the case with your in-laws NanKate

Thanks nellie I think you have got it spot on. DS was a musician before he started writing so that really kicked things off.

Thanks for the article DurhamJen will see what the Guardian has to say about inequality.

Actually, NanKate, this is what I thought your thread might be about.

www.theguardian.com/society/2014/sep/05/poverty-uk-better-calling-it-inequality

Perhaps your inlaws are just being up-to-date!

Nankate Perhaps it was your in laws thought that your son could never make a living doing "arty farty" things like being an author as it wasn't a proper job. Good for him.

I agree with kitty. Being a member of NT does not stop you going over the border into other counties.
There are many more properties in the East Midlands than in the North East. However, research shows that many people are willing to drive for three hours for a daytrip. That brings in a lot more.
I used to live in Peterborough, and we often went to the Norfolk coast, as well as Stamford, Oakham and Uppingham.
The Shugborough estate is only an hour from Leicester, and it's massive.
That's worth NT membership alone.

Kitty I must admit I have never been to any of those places. I have heard of Uppingham, is that where the Boys' School is ?

You've got a good point Nfk but I don't see volunteering as one of the things they would consider doing, but I may be doing them a disservice in saying that.

To be honest I have never forgiven my DH's family for saying that they thought our DS 'was a bit suspect' and 'why doesn't he get a proper job'. They never said quite what they meant by 'suspect' but it sounded awful to me.

He has had the last laugh on them though as he is now a successful children's author, but I suspect they haven't told anyone.

Now if they volunteered for the NT they'd get in free!

Actually, there aren't that many in Leicestershire but loads round about.

Leicester Museum is good - they have Richard Attenborough's collection of Picasso Porcelain/china (??) There is the new Richard 111 exhibition, Foxton Locks are well worth a visit.

I presume you have walked round Oakham, Uppingham and Market Harborough?

I think, very unkind of me I know, Kitty that my DH's Bro and SinL didn't want to go to a NT house because they don't have an annual ticket like us and it would have been difficult for them to see us going in free and them shelling out.

They told me there were very few NT properties in Leicestershire, which I found hard to believe, but decided to say nothing as I was on a promise to behave myself.

DH 's brother and Sil insist on going to NT places when we meet up as she is a volunteer ans we get a reduction on our lunch!

Do try Stoneywell, it will be fabulous and is quite near being close to Beacon Hill and Bradgate at Ulverscroft. It was built by Gimson and had remained in the family until NT bought it.

Thanks for all the suggestions of interesting places to visit, I shall note those down for the future especially the Museum of Childhood.

We too count our blessings especially our DS and GSs which my DH's family don't have.

The NT web site will tell you which properties are open on which days. I think many of them stay open nowadays until after the autumn half term when they are likely to do good business. I agree about Sudbury - the museum of childhood is interesting and the house itself has some lovely features.

Kedleston is closed on a Friday, but Hardwick is open all year round on a Friday. Hardwick has two halls, one NT and one EH.
Sudbury is really interesting, too, and open on a Friday. It sounds like your relatives could do with a visit to the Museum of Childhood, NanKate.
I do not think the Workhouse would change attitudes there, kitty.

There is quite a lot of NT stuff round here NanKate and Chatsworth is sooooo expensive! Have you been to Calke Abbey, Kedleston, Sudbury, The Workhouse? There is a new Arts and Crafts house opening soon (or might just have) called Stoneywell. You have to prebook but it's lovely!

It's lovely to see people succeed in their lives however they determine success but happiness seems elusive in our consumer driven society. My partner and I try to take our pleasures in simple things,but we are grateful to have enough to run our home, eat and enjoy the occasional holiday. We count our blessings and our family life is one of them.

I agree jess

kitty as long as you do not have money worries, I think contentment comes from within. People who are very driven to become rich can be driven because they feel they will be happy one day if they have more money (or a nicer car etc). But a new possession only makes someone happy for a short time before they feel unhappy and want something else, or more of something to cheer them up. Does Rupert Murdoch look like a happy bunny? Or Silvio Berlusconi?
(Maybe Branson looks like he has fun, but who knows?)

There's a lot of people like your in-laws Nankate. Lucky them that it's sort of their hobby and not a necessity.

Are they members of the National Trust? If so do they know that they can get a reduction once over 65? Or that it's cheaper to join the Scottish National Trust?! (Most NT properties are open only six days a week - different days, so there's always a property open in the area - and they're all still open in September)

I would find it wearing. It's not people being much better off than me I object to. it's the whether or not they flaunt it in a self congratulatory way.

A relative of OHs from a very working class background built up a niche market engineering business and became very wealthy.
However they had always seen their good fortune as just being in the right place at the right time and were never complacent about it.
They remembered their roots.

I do hope your handicap is better than hers, sueb.

I have a golf buddy who has a lot of money mostly inheritance on both sides of the family. She spends it like water. e.g. her diamond bracelet broke so instead of paying a £1400 repair bill she bought a new one at £14K and put the broken one in a drawer. This is not the problem though. She has a horrible habit of denigrating anything anyone else has done or will be doing e.g. f you say you are going somewhere on holiday she will say been there we didn't like it - with a sniff; or a restaurant that you really like - never had a decent meal there. She is forever telling how much she spent in Jaeger or a designer shop in Oakham. I never know how to reply without looking envious which I'm not really well only of her dog and her aga both of which I wold love but wont get. When we are on our own she is much better but when there is an audience its so obnoxious - how would you reply to this?