If I hear it "ping" I check for text messages. Otherwise, it can be some time before I think to check my phone. I suppose my reasoning is that if someone needed to speak to me urgently they'd ring rather than text or e-mail. As you can't hear the phone mrsmopp, I can see why texts are your only way of getting in touch. Does your friend realise this - have you told her?
Our Welfare State. Is it broken?