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Arriving “empty handed”. Parallelling *mawbroon*’s post

(35 Posts)
Feelingmyage55 Tue 13-Nov-18 14:02:59

mawbroon raised the issue of arriving empty handed and I almost made excuses for the guests. My DC brought various friends for half term, all professionals earning excellent salaries. They arrived, stayed in our annex, fridge filled, local treats provided, wellies, waterproofs. Arrived a day late, just didn’t show up. Stayed on extra days, didn’t ask but we did not mind. Went out to nice hotel on last night for a meal. Did not invite us to join them. OH is mortally offended, I am trying to tell myself that at least we are meeting DC’s friends and that is just young folk today. DC’s other friends came to stay last week without DC - arrived with chocolates, left a card, flowers arrived yesterday. Feeling happier. Two different experiences. I know which I preferred. What do others expect? What should I expect?

Apricity Tue 13-Nov-18 22:06:23

First lot were just rude entitled prats. I would have a word to your offspring to let them know that group would not be welcome again. I can understand them not inviting you to their dinner but with no expression of appreciation for your hospitality, no gift, no thanks of any sort then I wouldn't have them again.

merlotgran Tue 13-Nov-18 22:34:39

Remember those hard up days of the sixties and seventies? Bottle parties were all the rage and DH would help me clear up cheering that we'd made a profit!! grin

Witzend Tue 13-Nov-18 23:03:40

A Canadian cousin I'd never met before asked to come and stay - he was with us for 10 nights. He brought nothing, not that I was really expecting anything. Took him to see the London sights, etc. - paid for it all! and after he left we had not so much as an email to say thank you.

He was about 50. One night he wanted to go to a pub with dd, then mid 30s. She bought 2 rounds, while he sat back and let her. Only when she said, 'Your round now,' did he put his hand in his pocket.
Talk about a freeloader. Never again.

Eloethan Wed 14-Nov-18 00:25:29

Very rude, in my opinion.

oldbatty Wed 14-Nov-18 09:58:04

My kids are nice and polite. They have had a variety of friends, some rude , some polite.

Please do not have a have a go at my parenting or my family because you don't like me.

Thank you.

MawBroon Wed 14-Nov-18 10:16:38

Was anybody, oldbatty ?

Madgran77 Wed 14-Nov-18 12:10:23

It was rude of them. And it smacks of a sense of entitlement and arrogance! Dear me!!

jenpax Wed 14-Nov-18 12:37:01

Goodness me how rude! I was brought up to always bring a gift when invited to someone’s house for a meal never mind staying as a house guest! This rule applies for me even if it’s family!
I would speak to the AC and say that you are always happy to see friends but good manners are essential! It sounds as if they treated you like a guest house or hotel!!

felice Wed 14-Nov-18 13:03:43

When we lived in Portugal, the first summer we were there two couples came to visit at seperate times.
They constantly complained, the worst was that we were not taking them out, we kept pointing out that we were working, not on holiday.
I then heard that one couple had told all our old neighbours that we were unfriendly and did not spend time with them.
One pair would rise late, when we were already at work, my DS1 had gone back to our house for something and found them at the table waiting for their breakfast. He explained again, where the kettle was etc !!!
We had told them they would probably be better hiring a car and had provided maps and lots of local details.
The other pair argued with us when we would not let them take DD to a waterpark, said we were selfish and cruel.
She was at school, I asked if they would take their children out for the day during the school term, and they were horrified at the suggestion.
Never again, and if people suggest coming to visit here I give them a list of Hotels in the neighbourhood.