First time poster but very long time lurker- sorry for the long post but I’d appreciate the views of the wise Grans here please !
My adult DS 33 and DD 30 do not see eye- to - eye, this has been apparent for a while - since he met and married his wife but more so since DD has had her 2 children.
They have fallen out a couple of times since the start of the this years lockdowns but last week they had a huge row because she broke the rules to see a very vulnerable and depressed friend outdoors on a walk.
He says she doesn’t care about people enough to stay home and follow the rules she says that their circumstances are very different and it’s easier for some people to adhere strictly to the rules - whatever.
As always I’m stuck here in the middle, missing my grandchildren terribly, following the rules and like everyone, wanting everything back to normal.
I feel he is very much using this situation to find fault and reasons to conveniently be unpleasant to and about his sister but he lives with me at the moment and I’m not good with dealing with conflict so don’t want to provoke him into an argument with me because ultimately, he’s right in this instance -she shouldn’t have met the friend outdoors for a walk.
Today she stopped by the house in the car to drop off some things so me and her 3 year old daughter was calling in through the door to my son, she called and called bless her and he ignored her which she was visibly upset about. I feel so sad that I could have raised him to be the type of man that can be spiteful to a small child and want to say something about this but can’t seem to chose words which will have any impact on the situation. All I want is for them to be able to be pleasant enough to meet up as a family in the future without me feeling stressed that an argument will happen. I don’t know whether I need to have a word or just try and deal with my own emotions around all of this conflict- what would you do or say in this situation ?
