How to pay for care?

Anno I'm with you! I hope I have provided suffiently for my older age care. If that involves selling the house! So be it! I can certainly go on for several years on a combination of income and savings, however I do have an unnecessarily large house, so if I have to sell it I will. My dd has poa for me and I know she will do for me what is correct.
I would however much prefer to cared for in my own home! If I had to leave I would break my heart not to be able to see the sea every day!

Hi absent

We still get abuse about me keeping the house which was willed to me by my parents instead of letting his ex lady friend have it who Dad had split up from.
The problem is she appears to have a lot of friends around the area where as myself and daughters are almost newcomers.
Legally it is now my house and that is the way it will remain.
There is no way we are giving up a property worth about £500,000.

Frank

Frank don't 'give it up', sell up and move out. The simplest solutions are always the best.

Oh, the house again...

It's probably a run down two up two down terrace in hands worth!

Oh, Galen, light the blue touch paper and retire immediately!!

Hi Orca

I have to say the abuse is starting to subside. It is now about 3 to 4 times a week rather than 3 or 4 times a day and 1 lady fell over the kerb when she was having a moan at me and nearly got ran over by a car.
What I can not understand is if my fathers ex thinks the house should be hers why does she not take me to court.

Frank

Probably because she knows she has no case. She must be very bitter, though, to have convinced all these people that she's been wronged...

Maybe she is just one of those people who cannot let something go...........

Or you're imagining it

Or very convincing Ana????

Hi Gracesmum / Orca

I have heard a lot of people say if a woman lives with a man who is widowed the house will go to her in priority to the children even if the children have inherited the wife's half of the house and they are named on the land certificate.

They are totally wrong. Half the house belongs to the offspring under these circumstances.
I am not sure if the children can move in and sell it immediately if the father passes away before the new spouse.

Frank

I'm familiar with the laws of inheritance Frank as no doubt so is Gracesmum. That wasn't my point.

Lots of people will say lots of things. Empty vessels…

Orca

I was not saying you were unfamiliar with the law on inheritance.
I was just saying a lot of people do not understand the law on inheritance.

Frank

I have never heard anybody say or claim that if you live with someone, who has lost their spouse, the partne r(unmarried) gets the house when the widow/er dies. I havent even read it in the problems column of a magazine or newspaper.

There are people (not just women!) who think that if they have lived with someone for a significant number of years and, in particular if they have given up a career or had children by that partner they should be entitled to a share of the house, but that is entirely different

And, no Frank, children who own half a house cannot automatically move in and sell the house when the widow/er is still alive. If wills are properly drawn up what can and cant be done will be clearly set out. The owner of a holiday home where my parents lived left the home to his wife and two children. His second wife got £15,000 of the value and the children, from the first marriage the rest. By the time the owner died the property was worth over £100,000. The second wife was so agrieved that her share of the property was so small, she refused to sell her share. This meant the house could not be sold. The house stood empty and decaying for nearly 20 years until she died. By then it was in an unsafe condition and had to be demolished and the land sold as a housing site, for about £250,000!!

Hi FlicketyB

I know I could have not thrown Dad out but what I was thinking if he had got married again there could have been difficulties.
It did say on the land certificate no sale or transfer of the house without the consent of both parties both parties being myself and my father.
I suppose my father could have willed his half to his ex lady friend but it looks as if I could have stopped Dad's half of the house being transferred to her as I would have not given my consent.
I am not sure what would have happened in that event.
The other problem if I could have stopped the transfer of the title to the house it would have meant she would have no ownership of the property and I am not sure if she would have had to leave or if this would have been overridden in some way.
Of course I was living in the property and I don't think Dad could have thrown me out just by getting married but the situation could have been very difficult.

Frank

How long ago was all this? Why not just let go?

Hi Galen

Dad passed away just over a year ago and Dad had split with this woman nearly 3 years ago after she wanted be to leave.
The morning after his death the woman phoned and asked when I will be moving out of the house and handing it over and I just put the phone down.
Last year she had about 20 supporters and almost every time I went out of the house somebody approached me and demanded I hand over the house to her.
It is now frizzling out but I am still getting approached about 2 or 3 times a week.
I just walk off and ignore them.

Frank

Hunter, all I said was that I had never heard of anyone claiming that someone in an unmarried partnership could claim the home of their partner when they died, simply because the deceased was a widow/er.

I think the lady in question and her supporters are the only people in the country that do.

It was a general comment not a discussion of your particular circumstances.

We seem to have gone full circle! [bored emoticon]