Gransnet forums

Grandparenting

Overbearing other grandmother

(80 Posts)
NordschleifeQueen Tue 21-Aug-18 00:02:10

This is my first post.

My son and GF are expecting their first child (our first GC in January) this was a big shock as they had been through a really rocky patch around the time she must have just been pregnant. Her mother sent me a hurtful message about my son, I didn't respond. When they told us about the baby, they told her parents first, my son was suddenly a wonderful person again.

Her mother has become overbearing already and it seems she has been desperate to be a grandmother. She seems to be buying everything she can lay her hands on. We were informed that they were buying the pram, we were also informed that we could buy the cot. I would have liked them to use the beautiful cot we have lovingly kept since having our children but without even being seen the GF has rejected it, So we are to purchase a cot, having just discovered how much her parents have spent on the pram I am struggling to see how we can make an equal contribution.

I know it's not all about the money but I am slightly fearful about how things are going to pan out due to her mother being a bit overbearing and having way too much time on her hands.

Domino2 Mon 24-Dec-18 11:09:31

I would agree wholeheartedly with 'just keep loving your grandchild' and 'don't try to compete'. Our daughter died from cancer 18 months after giving birth to our first grandchild. Mother-in-law has moved next door to her son, bought every stitch our grandson wears, sees him almost daily (even when it isn't wanted) and generally treats him as though she is his (rather overbearing) mother.

But who does he ask for when he wakes at night? Me!

sodapop Mon 24-Dec-18 11:49:35

I'm so sorry about your daughter Domino that is very sad for all of you.
I agree with you, just keep loving your grandchild, its not a competition.

Luckylegs9 Mon 24-Dec-18 16:38:30

This was posted on 21 August, the later as not been on again. I do hope she is a happy grandmother and things worked out for her.

lemongrove Mon 24-Dec-18 17:08:34

Yes Lucky it’s an old thread gone cold.