Help calm me. House buying and selling stress

shandy!! don`t look back with any regrets. Good progress for you again

Yoginimeisje, your move sounds good and steady

I don`t think any of us realised the humungous amount of work needed for the actual move and settling in process, completion is just the beginning. My advice to anyone in the process is to start clearing as soon as humanly possible

Shandy really not worth looking back. I have always said that the words 'If Only....' are two saddest in the English language. And, looking back in this way is similar.

The first house we bought when we got married in 1964 (Thanks to the LCC Mortgage system which took no account of earnings), was an end terrace Victorian one - when we finally managed to sell it eight years later - I really hated it.

So cold, and draughty, no proper bathroom (was off one of the bedrooms), no proper heating, difficult shape, woodworm, water beetles, tiny scullery kitchen, etc. etc.
That property (admittedly all well done up), is now in an area that has undergone 'gentrification' - and is probably divided into two flats, each selling at around half a million pounds!!!

Do I regret selling when we did in 1972 for six thousand (£6,000)? Not for one minute! That sale was what started me on the road to the wonderful flat I now live in. All I can really remember were the problems with that house and how unhappy I was there.

I can so well remember that evening that my second child was born there, and it was pouring with rain, and then I heard the rain coming in through on of the closed windows, and the feeling of total panic I felt. We never managed to get round to doing much real work on that house in the eight years we were there, as any spare (and not so spare) cash was used up in just trying to maintain it Last time I loved anywhere without central heating.

Morning all, great to wake up to sunshine again - and no noise!

Thanks for your kind comments, sorry I bought back your window memory Franbern! I am a sentimental hoarder and decluttering was so hard for me. I still haven't rehomed the chandelier, but will once I can get to it.

I'm feeling really guilty this morning. I thought my dog was sulking the other evening because he had his nose under the chair and I told him off - this morning he did it again and I got on the floor to stroke him - his ball is under there. Bad owner!

Morning all

Thank you Fran

Congratulations Shandy finally getting your roof fixed, what a nightmare you've had!

I was expecting my boxes & wrapping to be delivered yesterday, didn't arrive! I'm using the boxes my new neighbour gave me, so it didn't hold me back and with my D&GDs coming for dinner, it was just as well. I now know what to buy my GDs for b/days and Xmas from now on; packing boxes

I have held onto my large Dutch furniture that I brought when I lived there. I know it's really too big for a small flat but it all holds memories and my sideboard I use as a safe!

Poor Shandy's doggie!

Sounds like things are moving in the right direction for everyone at last!

Morning all

Wondered if that was a bad omen writing that my boxes hadn't come. So busy Friday cooking dinner for D&GD, plus packing beforehand, then Saturday packing and cleaning till late dinner. Went to bed couldn't sleep as suddenly got the thought in my head that I'd been abandoned by my movers as I hadn't heard from them since Tues, although I did email them Friday morning & left a voicemail, but no replies.

Woke late due to not being able to get to sleep, no answer from phone again! Panicked and started phoning & emailing the previous movers that came round to give me a quote, all now booked. I said to my son 'OMG what are we going to do!

Just about to leave for my work and my booked movers phoned, sounding a bit amused at my panicked phone calls, saying all is well and will drop boxes Monday, Phew!!!

Morning Yogi, so who are you going with? Original 'amused' movers? Not amusing at all is it, if you hadn't had your own boxes you'd have lost a whole weekend of packing. Hope there aren't any further hiccups and packing continues happily!

Yogi just one of the many panics which will occur during this final part of the moving process. Not surprised previous movers were fully booked, and so pleased that there was really no problem with your chosen one (other than that they appear not to have had someone in their office). Just think, by this time next week, you will be safely in your new home.
When I was in the unpacking process, my (then 9-year old) g.son loved my big packing boxes, he climbed in them, built them up high, really wanted me to keep them for him. I just wanted to collapse them and get rid of them as quickly as possible!!!
I made my first foray to a kitchen company on Saturday, this really helped me to sort out some of my ideas and making me quite excited now to getting this work done. He is coming to me tomorrow to do measuring up, etc. Waiting their quote with some trepidation. Appointment made for Saturday morning with two more companies in Bristol.

On Saturday early evening one of my neighbours popped in for a quick chat. Stupidly, I rushed into the kitchen to put something into my combi/microwave. Did not bother to put the light on in there. Five minutes later smoke alarm going mad - I had put it on microwave, instead of oven - one burnt offering, and roomful of smoke. Fortunately, I was being taken out Saturday evening (to waissailing), so was able to keep windows open for several hours. Fortunately, no damage done either to microwave or kitchen, but made me aware as to how quickly serious accidents can occur.

I spent much of yesterday in the office, trying to get together information to answer new and extra Solicitors questions with regard to one of the flats here being sold. This block of 25 flats has been here for forty years, with approximately 70+ sales over that time. None of these queries had ever arisen before. No wonder it is taking conveyancing so long these days, solicitors seem to spend so much of their time, trying to find more and more queries.

Really it is other people causing the stress, you have been organised all the way along, yogi. I think that the whole buying/selling stress is most often caused by others, the buyers, the sellers, the movers, the estate agents, solicitors. I wonder why on earth we cannot have a system as in australia. My two aus sisters moved two years ago and the whole process was governed by rules, so neither were ever stressed, apart from the physicality

This ukraine thing is becoming quite scary, down to putin and his kgb mindset posturing. We get oil and gas from ukraine so could well be in a very tricky situation soon. My uncle was shot and killed by the kgb, in front of his wife, kgb are absolutely ruthless. It is all written down in the family book that I put together, grandson thinks he has an awesome family history. It is certainly very unusual

The weather here is horrible, it will be dark and gloomy all day and seems to be the same for two more days. No sun, so it feels colder and I upped the heating

Is the roofer at yours now shandy?

Ah Franbern sorry that happened to you. I miss the aga but regularly had black charcoaled burnt offerings, I'd put something in then the kids would need help making a volcano for school or maths homework! I did enjoy the children's school days, not sure they did.

Sorry you've got bad weather karmalady, I think I've got all the good weather today. Men are here and it's sunny and 48 degrees. I've just asked if the roofer is going to have scaffolding as I need the 'cap' checked on the chimney - he isn't, but they have offered to take a look.

I agree about the Ukraine - and I'm sorry your Uncle was shot, how terrifying for your aunt.

Keep going Yogi!

I most definitely would not get too worried about the current situation re Ukraine. During my eighty years, I do not think there has been single day during which a hot war has not been waged somewhere. Just because this is slightly nearer home, suddenly we are more concerned. Lots of posturing on both sides, unlikely to become a hot war - wold not be good for either side.

My next silly doing to report. Checked my emails this morning for my Sainsbury's delivery (which I finalised last night)- and then suddenly realised I had booked it for NEXT MONDAY!!!....Just did not notice date. So, bus to Sainsbury's and shopping all done now.

I have had to spend sometime on emails with a local EA, who is advertising the latest flat here going on the market, but did not have totally correct information. The people who lived there have now both died, so it their heirs who are selling it. We have been in close contact with them, pity they did not check some of these facts before going to the EA. Seems to be a lot of interest, two viewers the day after it went on the market. Will be more work for me!!!!

Oh Franber, probate - nasty, I hope the family all agree on the price. And I hope their garage has the deeds and they don't have to suffer the palaver you did trying to find out!

Hi Shandy, do not think there is any problem with the probate on that flat. And, the whole business I had re my garage was just because the Solicitor had not read the Land Registry forms properly. It was listed there and my para-legal daughter found it by careful reading of those papers. The at was when I lost all trust in Conveyancing Solicitors.

We have two flats going through conveyancing at present, this will be the third. One lady who lives here is now 103 years old - do wonder how long it will be before that flat will have to go on the market.

Someone did say that moving to this particular block of flats puts ten years plus on your life. We are do not any form of age restrictions, but we do not attract younger purchasers, and most of us here are either retired or coming up to retirement. Apart from that 103 year old lady we have others in their 90's, and many in their 80's. All living happily and totally independently.

Glad you have sunny weather up where you are, Shandy. It is dismal down here and no sign of sun at all.

I mentioned last week that my youngest son would have been 45 years old had he not died nearly twenty years ago. My eldest daughter, in our 'phone chat this weekend told me that a couple of his workmates (who had arranged a wonderful memorial to him at the time), had contacted her saying they would like to do something this year to mark that 20 years, as they still miss him and talk about him a lot.

Hello again Franbern, sorry I missed your 'n' before! Just waiting for the air fryer and thought I'd pop in.

I'm glad this sale won't cause you any headaches, sorry I got my facts wrong about your garage. How lovely to think you too could live until 103! I wonder if the thread will still be going!

How very nice your son's work mates are honouring him in this way. I wonder if their lives have turned out as they expected since he left them. I hope your daughter will be able to email you with any photos they post on Fb. My friend's son was killed in December 2019 and they 'memorialised' his page, it's nice, people still write on it to say they miss him.

Sending a little of my sunshine for your balcony only, I don't want them to stop work because their hands are frozen!

Franbern, I did like to read about those mature ages in your flats. People should know that living independently can be done in the right circumstances. I think a lot of people believe that there is no alternative to eventual assisted living, obviously there is, if in a group of supportive people. I hope the dynamics don`t change too much because of the new, different, people coming in

I did some star jumps this morning, only a few at a time. Winter is the worst time for me because the rest of the year I am always lifting, cycling and moving around and I want to avoid osteoporosis creeping up over winter. We need impact exercise to build the bone cells called osteoblasts, hence the jumps. Hehe, skipping would be good but I would trip over the rope

Arghh the weather looks depressing on four days this week, Dull flat days, no sparkle. I really don`t feel as though we are going to have a very cold winter and I may reconnect my water butts today. I empty them at the start of winter.

I am sorting seeds today Any volcanic activity, throwing dust into the air, always spoils the following summer or two, that may well govern what summer veg I grow and where eg small outdoor tomatoes will ripen much faster than big tomatoes

I went for a walk into town yesterday, I must have said good morning to eight people and they responded, a nice start to the day. All were on their own and most were older women. I only came back with a few fruits and a bunch of carrots but I deliberately go and support our wonderful greengrocer. They also sell other nice things, like cheeses, jams, unusual crackers. It is a small shop but so gratifying to see the queues outside the door and that is a good place to get into a conversation with strangers

I have had a deliberate aim of using my stored foodstuffs this winter, I have found it very psychologically difficult to buy just for myself and have yet to come to terms of being within walking distance of good shops like two bakeries greengrocer, wholefood shop as well as supermarket and other shops. I keep thinking about the amount of space I still have to clear and there is a lot.

I am also working hard on clearing my freezer, I will have around 20kg of various berries to store from june, they are a very vital foodstuff in my life. I made 2 small loaves of spelt and rye bread yesterday, sliced and frozen and thursday will make some ready meals from a lb of shin. Its hard trying to empty the freezer but it will be easier once I have gone through my meat and the nuts that I bought in bulk and the coffee beans. I eat organic and often coffee and meat can only be bought online, hence the bulk.

I always have an aim or other, keeps me upbeat and moving house was my last big aim. Nowadays, it is more of a conscious effort to make the aims. I suppose I am biding time, my painter said he will come early february to finish. I really hope so, workspeople are impossibly difficult to pin down

Further to Karma's post. Just to say that there are 25 flats here (23 wo bedroom/twobathrooms & two with three bedrooms). Eleven of them are occupied by couples, the remainder by singles. I would love to be able to know all birth dates and work out the exact total of our ages!!!!!

A couple do have meals on wheels delivered, several have cleaners, although the flats do tend to be very easy to keep clean. All of us have a list showing the landline telephone numbers of all flats. The layout is five flats on each floor divided into smaller lobbies, one with three and one with two front doors. We have a large and beautiful entrance lobby and most days, there are some people having a short chat with each other down there, whilst going in/out/collecting their post. So, we are friendly group, whilst those

I spwho wish can keep very private. Yes, we assist if someone needs help if coming home from hospital, etc with getting prescriptions, even the occasional few bits of shopping. The Committee has a spare front key to each flat for emergencies, also the contact details for a family member to call if required.

I suppose it is something similar to a retirement village, although, as I said, there are no age restrictions. Because we are so close to the town centre, with its High Street, Beach, Theatres, Cinemas, Library, museum, and many restaurants, etc. I suppose it tends to attract older people. It definitely attracted me -and I have never regretted my move here for one minute.

This morning, I am expecting a visit from the 'planner' from the kitchen company I visited on Saturday. I have appointments made to visit two different ones next weekend. I really would like to get some sort of 'ballpark' figure as to cost, so I can start to sort out my head on this.

Shandy How long does the roofer expect to be there to complete his work??. Good you have nice weather for this work to go ahead. Think we are told not to expect any sun until Thursday of this week. Be interesting to see what you think of an air-fryer. I have decided it is a gadget I really do not need. Chips, - even those cooked with minimal fat,- is really not something I should be eating. I am finding it difficult to get off those last 4/5 lbs that I want to do, so that when I return to my annual medical check up at end of March I can say that I have lost two stone since last year.

Morning all, very interesting to read your posts. Sorry you both have dull weather, it's overcast here today too.

I do miss my huge freezer, it was body sized, I've now got five little drawers so have to think when I buy.

Roofer wise I don't know when he is coming, the builder's men are still preparing it, banging and drilling and shouting! It's so good to go to bed knowing I won't be woken by splatting water or things rolling around on the roof.

I've just come on to tell you of my 'gratitude moment'. I had to get up early for me, scrape the car, and take my car in for it's MOT by 8.30 am - with my dog. I couldn't leave him as usual because the men keep coming out to use the toilet, and I was worried in case he was scared/got out. Thing is he can no longer walk far, so I had to take his buggy with me in the car, and push him down the icy hill to the bus station. But when I got there I realised now I've moved, I've a choice of two buses! Woo hoo! For anyone that lives in the countryside with a rural hourly service you'll understand my joy. Instead of having to wait 40 minutes the normal single decker I get, I was able to walk straight onto the big bus! An experience in itself holding on, my bottom has was clenched to keep me on the seat most of the journey! Repeat performance tomorrow to collect it - keep your fingers crossed it passes. It's the last year I'll own it, I must get a petrol, smaller car.

Have a good day

I did a simple calc regarding the cost of running my air fryer this morning, to cook some susages and tomato. On full, this 2.2 tower air fryer is 1000watts or 1kw which is one whole unit if on full for 1 hour. I used 1/4 of a unit. Heck of a lot cheaper than using my grill

Sorry Franbern forgot about the air fryer - I like it because the oven here is knackered. Now I've looked back at the RightMove details I see it's been here twelve years! I cook nearly everything in my airfryer, and my friend who eats both meat and fish has many delicious recipes that are ready in ten/fifteen minutes.

I just read your update shandy and yes whoo hoo, reading that has hit me too made me ever so grateful just now, that I bit the bullet and moved from my last cosy home, in a small village, with one bus every 2 hours between 8 and 4

The bus station is a disgusting hole karmalady, considering it is the Duke's seat. Rubbish, drunks, rubbish and drunks. So glad not to have to sit there at all today, the bus driver was just getting into the bus as I arrived.

Now steeling myself for the long walk to the beach with the dog. He can't stop barking, every time the men bang or crash he thinks someone's knocking at the front door.

My neighbour's daughter has actually just knocked - she is going to have to sell the house to pay the fees, her Mum's savings have nearly gone already

Yes my solicitor was very thorough, always asking many questions, to the point of the other solicitor protesting!

Scary stuff Karmalady my son is just filling me in, terrible about your uncle! Weather not good, but no rain Hurray

yes yogi, he left Poland a young man to fight in ww2, with the Brits, fought all through the war and never saw his mum again. He married my mum, in Holland, met her after being billeted in the family home. He could not return to Poland, would have been shot by kgb. Settled in England and had to sign on as an alien. Reared 7 children, who all became aspirational professionals, medical, teachers and engineers

His story started well before then. His parents and 2 children were forcibly taken in cattle wagons, to be forced slave labour in russia. He was actually born in that slave camp and eventually they were returned to Poland. Lived on a small farm and soon the russions stole that farm when parts of poland were annexed

I was 15 when they thought it was safe to visit family in Poland. I remember, we were very poor,he sold an insurance policy to pay for the trip. 10 year old bedford van, he put windows in and seats and a spare petrol tank underneath. All 9 of us, I was the oldest, drove to Poland via Holland from Liverpool, those days 60 miles to Blackpool was a long way. I remember the sheer terror at going across east Germany, the soldiers and the tanks

I see that yet again there is no rain in the forecast for the week, belt and braces for me as I don`t want to be putting precious tap water on the garden in a few months time. I re-connected my two big water butts in the hope that february/march brings some rain.

Seed sorting is also finished, ready for the new cycle. I am still living in hope, that my painter comes early february, like he said he would. I feel stuck until that happens.