Christmas !

Tell her they can all come if she sorts the beds out herself and also does the washing (of at least srips the beds and puts it in the machine) before she leaves.

She's a grown woman, let her take some responsibility.

She's 24 ....lives in a rented house with two other students.
I wouldn't want to come back to all the washing ,even if it was in the machine!

Would it work if you agreed to your dd bringing friends but that you take nothing to do with the arrangements. No sorting beds or bedding.

Your dd or the friends can bring a Z bed/sleep on sofa/ floor/ inflatable air bed/ whatever they wish. And the house left as they found it with any bedding washed (if not ironed), Or indeed being their own bedding I.e. sleeping bags. Also kitchen and bathroom left clean.

Friends who come to visit us at our summer holiday apartment are asked to bring their own bedding except for the duvet.

They would all come on train ...so wouldn't be able to carry it all .

I don't think I could stand it while I was away wondering and wondering

My best friend has just texted and agrees it's No ...she knows us and house very well
So it's a no from me ...and no from OH too

My response would be no, can you trust her not to have a party ? I tend not to allow people to stay in my houses unless I am there too.

She's not exactly a student or a teenager! I would have thought she could be trusted with the proviso that she gets it all ready and deals with it all when they leave. Sheets could always be sent to a laundry - at their expense.

Doesn't sound as though Glamdram wants any suggestions apart from 'Just Say No'...

Oh goodness did you say 24 and you can't trust her and three other young people in your house alone I think that's very unbelievable Surely it's much better than leaving an empty house to be burgled .... unless you know she's unreliable I would thought you would love to have them looking after your home for you while you're away shes not a child not a teenager surely she a responsible adult and your own not a stranger
I m not surprised she's miffed I d be hurt
If you, your husband and your friend have all made your minds up that it's impossible to say yes then why ask for ideas on here ?

I'd say yes, with the proviso that they sort themselves out and leave the place as they found it. It does seem a shame not to let them have a break with their friends while the house is empty anyway. I'd be miffed too in her place at being knocked back.

Ditto Maggiemaybe-

Thankyou for all suggestions

Daughter and boyfriend are one thing but unknown friends are quite another!

It's not a question of trusting or not trusting though is it? It's that Glamdram would not enjoy her Christmas break knowing that not only her daughter but strangers are in her home doing who knows what.

Some people would be completely relaxed about that but Glamdram isn't and neither would I be. Do what feels right for you I say and do not feel guilty!

My home is just that, MY home. My personal possessions would feel violated. I would imagine drawers being opened, letters read etc.
It would be a definite no from me.

It would be a yes from me with all the provisos which have already been mentioned but DH would say NO he is less of a softie than me. Let them come but clear up all the mess and leave you a nice gift of wine etc.

Just ask her to bring their own bedding and towel- simple.

I wouldn't be happy about the extra two I didn't know.

Yes from me, in a heartbeat.
My son's friends all brought their own sleeping bags, btw. No washing sheets involved, the occasional towel but that's no hardship. No chandeliers were harmed, assuming they did actually swing from them .
Obviously, tho, you just don't welcome 'strangers' into your home and that's your prerogative, hope your child understands where you're coming fromWhy there's an assumption that because they're students they will riot and leave 'mess' I just don't know...

By the time she was 24 DD was a lot more housetrained and organised than me. We had moved into my late mother's house, but kept our council house on for a couple of weeks so that she and her friends could stay there over the weekend that she was getting married. We found the place was still standing after they all left.

Unclench! You'll moan when she doesn't bring grandchildren round. And yes, it's safer to have people in from a burglary angle.

This isn't really about washing a few sheets is it?

I wouldn't have the extra 2, I would ask that house is left as they found it! But must say I would like to say no!

Good grief! I wouldn't be happy having strangers in my house whilst I was away. They might find the bodies!

Agree with ExaltedWombat: more going on here than just the laundry angle. Has Glamdram had previous bad experiences with her daughter's friends? A 24 year old should be sufficiently mature to have like-minded friends and would not dream of bringing anyone who was not likely to respect another person's home.
I can see pros and cons; good to have the house occupied but appreciate unease at the thought of curious strangers going through their drawers.
Several friends use house sitters when they go away and use a free website i.e. these sitters have references from previous house sittings but are not from a commercial agency which vets and insures them. Consequently it is pot luck as to how genuine or careful they are.
I would not want just anyone taking over the house and pets - could come home to find the house cleared or items damaged /stolen.
Not really appropriate to the question under discussion, but another friend lets her house out over the summer , she clears all her precious personal items into an outside studio and locks it. She maintains it is a good way of de-cluttering and the house gets a thorough cleaning and the money is good. Not for me.
I am a bit on the fence here: total strangers a big no-no, but friends of a daughter whom you trust , then yes - but with strict proviso re: laundry and leaving things as they found them.
However, it is a very individual decision and if it would make you feel uncomfortable and not able to enjoy the Christmas break then the answer is NO.