Murdered in New Zealand

It’s so very sad. I think the author and film makers of Fifty Shades if Grey should be in the dock for normalising BDSM. What a tragic development and loss of innocence this has brought about. Also I blame the easy access to free porn. Dating complete strangers on Tinder etc. too. How risky. Feel so sad for Grace’s family.
Also wonder how my 12 year old
granddaughter will cope with it all.

I have been thinking the same thing. It felt like the woman who had been murdered was blamed. In this country rape has a shocking prosecution rate to the extent that some articles have suggested that it has been decriminalised. Something is very wrong with society.

I’m wondering if the 27y old Tindr date who murdered Grace has ‘previous’ that is under legal wraps at the moment for whatever reason.

Poor Grace’s parents. My heart goes out to them. How they’ve had to sit and listen to all the sexual preferences of their 21y old daughter must had added enormously to their grief.

Life will never be the same again.

I have to say the statements in court reminded me of the time when rape victims were questioned about what they were wearing at the time and how many sexual partners they had.
It seems they were trying to say it was her fault because of her past, not his for being violent

I feel so sorry for her parents.

Victims and their families always get treated shabbily and it's about time the practice of airing " dirty laundry " in public is halted for the sake of the victim and families.
Nobody wants or wishes to hear any such background and it should be classed as confidential material the same as a hospital or GP would do concerning patient's records.

I think some details should be in a court closed to the general public. Only the judge, jury, family members (both sides) and legal teams should have access to this type of information.

I agree.
It would be like losing your child twice over.

We did wonder why his identity was being protected as he is an adult and whether this was a law in NZ.
If other cases are being investigated this could be an explanation but I see no reason for it because publicising who he was could have brought others forward who may have information.

Women are still shamed and blamed and the proliferation of pornography has a lot to answer for. Things seem to worse, not better.

It would appear that the law is an ass there as well as in the UK.

Oh my goodness, that poor girl! But, dating and going back to the flat of a stranger?! Foolish in the extreme!

Maybe it was a unrelated offence Callistemon but serious enough not to disclose. Sentencing for Grace’s murder isn’t until February next year - time for him to be tried again in the interim? I think that’s why his face is pixilated in the press. Must be for some reason?

The horrific revealing of the poor girl's sexual preferences will stick with many longer than the memories of her golden personality. I only hope her loving parents can find the strength to get beyond this.

I disagree that Grace was foolish in the extreme to go on a date and return to his flat Jabberwok. It happens a lot of the time without incident. By calling her foolish you are in some way saying she was to blame. Alone in a foreign country she just craved some company, attention, excitement, .... call it what you will. Quite normal.

A man is mugged in the street and has his wallet stolen.
He quite rightly reports this theft to the Police, who interview him.
The Victim explains that he was walking home alone in the early hours when he was approached by a man who threatened him with a knife, forcing him to had over his wallet.

Police Officer - Do you often walk around alone in the dark at night ?
Victim - Not very often, I had been at a work drinks party and wanted to clear my head.
PO - So you were Drunk ?
V - I wouldn't say drunk but I had had a few glasses of wine.
PO - Do you always dress in expensive suits ?
V - My image is important to me and I'm expected to dress to impress at work.
PO - Did your assailant attack you with the knife ?
V - No he just waved it about.
PO - Did you try to fight him off ?
V- No I was frightened that he would stab me ?
PO - Did you try to run away ?
V - No, I didn't want to provoke him.
PO - Is that a Rolex you're wearing ?
V - Yes but I fail to see the importance of that.
PO - Its important that you were walking alone at night, under the influence, wearing an expensive suit and watch, advertising the fact that you are a wealthy man, and did nothing to protect yourself. Have you been robbed before ?
Do you enjoy being mugged ? Some people might say you were asking for it.

We did this sketch with a girls drama group 25 years ago - nothings bloody changed

A student in Hull, I believe, went missing and her body was found several weeks later. This was earlier in the year. Footage had been shown with her obviously very much the worse for wear on her way home after a night out. A man has recently been charged with her murder.
I felt for her poor family, as being drunk will be the perception that people have of her, no different to scores of other young people. She must have been at the wrong place at the wrong time. So sad.

I understand the killer's name is being with held for his protection, can that really be true ?
Meanwhile the victim had her sexual history paraded in a public court - disgraceful.
I feel so sorry for her parents.

I don't understand any of it, really I don't. I am sorry for the family but how does a 21 year old become involved in this at all?

Sorry, I am on a major downer today. The world seems ugly.

Simple grapefruitpip a 21 year old who has been to university, who has had previous relationships in her time no doubt several, who spends half her time on the internet, who wants to impress her friends etc. the list is endless. Yes the world is ugly, but an outcome like this is very rare.

He's been named now

Lots of girls go travelling on their own, make friends as they go frapefruitpip.

Usually they are fine, have wonderful experiences but just occasionally will come up against a murderous bastard like this one with such devastating consequences.
Should girls stay at home, not venture out, not explore the world because of such people?

Sorry, spelling error
grapefruitpip

I didn't mean so much the traveling.

I’m afraid Call that sadly there are people ( including some GNers) who believe that girls and women should restrict their world to keep themselves safe. They never say that boys and men should do the same if they are not ale to behave properly around girls and women.

grapefruitpip
Didn't any of your children go travelling? Thousands have this adventure and thankfully the majority have a great time.
Unfortunately this lovely young girl met up with a killer ?

grapefruitpip
I've just seen your post i didn't mean so much the travelling
Are you referring to the sexual aspect of the case?