Cut out of their lives 3

Should have blued it www.gransnet.com/forums/media_non_member_requests topics.

I am always forgetting to do that.

Thanks elegran ..

I recognized a few names on there Elegran

The threads started by nonmembers paying their £30 are clearly labelled above the thread title with "Media/nonmember requests" so anyone who does not want to contribute to them can avoid them.

Quite a lot of them fizzle out immediately, or get so much criticism that it is a wonder that any more media/nonmembers risk starting one after reading an existing thread, but there seems always to be someone else who will try.

Some of them don't have a clue what Gransnet readers are really like, I have to say.

Hello everyone! Sorry to intrude, but I was just checking in to see how you were all doing..

About the "members" list - surely some of the names one sees are the names of the last posters? Or am I being a bit thick? (Probably!)

Sometimes people "join" GN just to get material for magazine articles they are writing, to get interviewees for research, or to advertise something. This is not allowed unless they pay their £30 to have their request placed in this media area. If people try to do this on other threads they should be reported for breaking GN rules.
Not much of an earner though is it. £2700 over 3 years. I hope GN is getting more money from their main adverts.

Perhaps it's not regarded as an 'earner' Jess , more an additional revenue stream, and perhaps a deterrent to mischief-makers.
Celebgran I don't think Tiger was 'gathering information'. I think she was trying to be helpfully constructive.

Absolutely jane

Morning all welcome Adriadne certainly not intruding.

Some thing yogagirl said about tiger disappearing made me think that Jain
As realised she has indeed gone.

Seem to remember her saying she was doing research.

May been wrong

Celeb I think tiger said she was doing a PhD.
That doesn't mean that she can't come on this or any other thread to offer constructive advice, surely.

Dollie invited me to join you. Though not sure how many of you all are Grans who have had your Grandchildren taken by the SS.
I have just come back from my last contact,not sure if we will ever see my lil'O again. It has been a very traumatic 18 months. I suppose at least I don't have to worry about me or my son being tormented by his ex and her family, had she got custody. Our lil'O will simply be a part of a family we will never know. Unless by a miracle the adoptive mum has a heart and a brain capable of sorting out the rubbish she gets told.
I am totally wasted now, I had to hold back all my tears and try and make the most of our last two hours.
We are waiting to move and hope a new home will help take some of the painful memories away. Knowing I will never have to travel through he neighbourhood or see less than friendly faces I could care less if I never saw again.
Waiting to retire so I don't have to work in one of the two trusts so blatantly responsible for what happened but will get away Scott free.
Knowing we still have more to come in the summer and if we get through that, will we have anything to start to address all the wrongs that have been done to our lil'O.
Not wanting to tar the entire SS with the same brush, but they are not fit for purpose and need to have their service investigated and changed. Knowing what I do now, had I played them at their own game would it be different?

Hi Suzanne sorry to hear youve had such a traumatic experience ...you must feel wretched ...dont ever give up hope thats all we have to hang onto...i hope you find some support on this thread that will get you through your rough days because we all have plenty of them..

Morning Suzanne I'm so very sorry to hear you have lost your little GD, do everything in your power to keep your visits going with her in her new family, don't take no for an answer, keep pushing for your visits, you are entitaled as her GM. Surely your S will get to see her and therefore you too. I did read a book on an American SS that was just taking children as they got lots of money if they adopted out of the birth family, it was harrowing reading! The damage done could not be reversed years down the line and it eventually got stopped, but all those families destroyed!! Best of luck to you and your S

Afternoon ladies. I'm sure you will find support here Suzanne as many of us have. It is so sad to read your story; I wish I could think of some words of comfort for you. It must have been heart braking and very traumatic knowing that you were walking away from what may well be your last contact with lil'0. All I can do is send you these .

I know from my own experience that when ever you need love and support you will find it here from all of the lovely ladies who contribute to this thread.

Speaking of lovely ladies, what a terrible story Yogagirl; some of the things that happen are so awful that it's hard to believe they can possibly be true. How's your man flu? hope you're all better now.

So good of you Ariadne to pop on and see how every one's doing . And no, you're not being a bit thick, I got terribly the moment I started reading the posts about members, non members etc. .

You're so right Dollie about us all having plenty of rough days; hope you've had a good week and some to enjoy.

Well its TGIF again so I think we should all enjoy some this evening as we look forward to the weekend. I know I've earned mine this week with my hard work at the gym and 2 good walks, and I'm sure you've all done plenty to deserve yours too.

Have a great weekend everyone. Best wishes xx

Thank you Smileless flu has gone today, so feeling well for first time in two weeks Got ND coming for dinner, so I'll cook something nice, it will be my first glass of wine for two weeks so I'm looking forward to dinner today .
Hope you're well Celebgran, did you get a reply?
I have no news! which is sad in itself, I'm thinking of writing a letter to my D, with a copy of my original application for visitations rights, which shows clearly which boxes were ticked, therefore showing what a heinous liar my s.i.l is!. My ND has already sent to rest of family via email and scan attachments. My D and s.i.l share their email add., which is strange in itself, so I would need to post it, in the hope she actually gets to read it herself, unlike the emails, which I can't tell if he gets to them first and deletes!!
and for TGIF

i am grateful for the warm welcome, hope to contribute and pay back soon. Especially once I get to know you better.

I pop into this thread every now and again, as much as anything else to get inspiration from others who are going through the unimaginable heartbreak/hell of having no contact with their children/grandchildren. I've been through the whole agony of losing my three daughters after a huge 'explosion' a couple of years ago. Slowly the fragments are beginning to be brought together now two of my daughters have re-contacted me - however the third is still being vindictive and is not letting me meet/see my (only) two grandchildren. I've met the eldest (grandson) twice and the youngest - well, I wasn't even told when she was born. One of my daughters came to visit me a couple of days ago (a rarity) and I asked her how my grandchildren were (I worry about their health, welfare, etc) she was adamant that she's not 'allowed' to talk about them to me ('orders' from her sister). I feel in so much pain and wonder just how much longer this is going to go on for…..

everyone

While what I have been through, through no fault of my own or my sons, at least the break has been 'clean' it is out of my hands. I have friends who are either out of touch with family for one reason or another. Some are quite spiteful. I suppose I am lucky in that I do not have that to bear.
I hope Boheminan, someday you can meet your grand children and your Daughter can see life is simply too short.
When my parents divorced acrimoniously I thought my Dad was the worst thing on earth, 'that' woman was worse. Luckily I was ably to see with the help of my mothers sister before he died that I could not simply hate him for something I had no control over.
It may be over simplified, but in comparison, I would 'rather' my pain than pain you must have. At least I have my son. If you can reconcile with your other daughters, maybe they could be an ally, like my Aunt in the future.

SuzanneL60 thank you

Welcome Suzanne and bohemian albeit latish! Had busy couple days sorry for delay!

Very sorry to hear you both have contact problems.

We all like to support each other and it really helps to know you not alone.

We have been devastated by our daughter cutting us out of her life, seemingly down to our a I law but we don't really know as she refuses to talk or mediate In Any way, so we have had 5 years of trying to rebuild our lives without her and 2 more Grandaughters born never seen. Our first precious one mollie is 6 this year it grieves me to write we not been part of her life since she was 9 months old

We have lovely son and each other and good friends, and have made so e lovely ones on hear. Welcome to you.

Can I just say yogagirl hope you lots better and I have now gone down with horrid throat and feel awful!
Husband gone work today and we due out tonight went out with my good friend yesterday enjoyed but felt grotty this coming on! Also bit low, guess the photo of our little ones upset me more than I realised.

Going back to bed with h coffee, dear husband got my cereal ready on tray before he went!

Computer trouble had buy new printer Thursday yippee managed instal it and get going eventually! Chap who helps us said he would charge £25 and we could get new printer for that he also said he could not do any more than me had told us to instal and reinstall didn't work!
Printed of photo of Grandaughters and husband put in frame nowl

Good hear from you smileless happy weekend. To us all even ill ones !

We got tickets for meal and play tonight friends picking us up hope I imrove!

First weekend without a house viewing, or having to work. It's a nice day out there so better not waste it. Countdown to the last day of Winter, my older Sons birthday. First day of spring something to look forward to!

Youngest has just brought me up a cup of coffee......might just have 5 more minutes in bed......

Happy Saturday everyone, hope you all have a good day.

Yogagirl crossed posts!,glad you feeling better sadly you passed it on to me!

No reply I never dreamt she would to be honest. Just felt had let her know.

Do not think will take up godmother offer to go visit with my husband. Tired of pleading and playing this cat and. Mouse game, just so sad would have adored to see grand daughters especially new baby!

Door always open but feel can do no more, just seeing that photo flared it all up so badly.

Suzanne you are right we must all embrace spring new beginnings whatever they hold good luck to us all.

Take it you hope. Move house ?