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No one can warn you

(53 Posts)
GreatauntieLinda Sun 30-Aug-15 19:24:50

My darling husband of 44 years died about five weeks ago. He had been poorly for a number of years but no one got the message through to me just how poorly he was.

No one before he died nor just after could or did warn me of this horrible feeling I am going through. Why oh why can we not be prepared for this sense of emptiness. We had no children, our lives were we two. Now I look at his empty chair. I cannot explain how I feel. I just want my Bob back. But know this cannot be so.

How can anyone prepare for this nightmare.

durhamjen Sun 13-Sep-15 00:13:10

You're the opposite side to me. I use Sniperley.

Do you know where Waterstone's is?
Vennels is up one of the alleyways, or vennels next to Waterstones.
Walk from the Market Square up to the Cathedral and you will pass Waterstone's on Saddler Street.
There's a courtyard - handy if you are meeting someone with dogs, and two floors of tables inside Vennels.
When we first visited our son and his family we found the cafe before he did.

Kayte Sun 13-Sep-15 09:22:42

I am so sorry for you and I have an idea of how you feel. And you are right, nothing prepares you for this.

My beloved husband of 41 years died two months ago and,despite a close, loving family, wonderful grandsons and many supportive friends, I remain devastated.
Everybody is so kind and sympathetic and I greatly appreciate that..... but of course, try as the do, they can't really understand the depth of my loss. How could anyone who has not lived through it?
The only advice I can offer you is that if you have widowed friends, talk to them about how you feel. I have found it helpful. They do understand. And there is some consolation in the fact that my husband will never have to suffer this terrible desolation.

By the way, I don't do Facebook, Twitter etc and have never before responded to a post but I felt so sad for you and hope this helps a little.
One day at a time. X