DH's family all live in the UK and we live in Spain. He has three older siblings with children who are now grown up. We have one daughter in common who is nine.
We keep his parents in the loop and try to visit them once a year at least (nobody his side ever visit us)
He doesnt have a close relationship with his parents or siblings. He left the UK when he was in his thirties as he didnt really feel part of the family and couldnt stand the climate.
Last year one of his nieces got married. We heard all about the impending wedding but were not invited (it was a big do with loads of bridesmaids etc)
We were both upset as we thought we had a good relationship with said niece, albeit not a very close one. I asked my MIL what DH had done not to be invited. As I said to her, it would have been nice to have received an invitation or an explanation, as all the rest of the family including extended and distant family were invited. She said that the invitations had been sent out by bride and groom and that the father of the bride had known nothing of it. Oh well, we put it down to not being close to the father of the bride, with whom DH has not always had a good friendship (they clash rather often on a lot of subjects)
Cue around Christmas finding out that another niece, this time by his sister with whom he gets on well, corresponds regularly etc, is getting married in September and we are not invited. My daughter, who adores her older cousin and has spent some time with her when on visits, is making her a wedding present, and at nine has not really cottoned on to the fact that had she been invited she could have gone. I feel upset and angry as my DH is feeling that he is constantly snubbed for no obvious reason.
Yet another niece has just announced her engagement on facebook and I am not expecting an invitation, given history.
We have no idea what we have done and the mother of the bride made a point of spending time with us last time we went to the UK, we had a lovely day together.
I just dont get it. is it now customary not to invite family if they live abroad? i can say that all these weddings will be big and it is not a financial problem.
Sorry for the rant but i needed to get it off my chest and dont want to talk about it with DH as i dont want him further upset.
Lisalou Mon 08-Aug-16 07:34:17
Mumsy Mon 08-Aug-16 08:00:43
Lisalou Mon 08-Aug-16 08:16:17
JackieBee1 Mon 08-Aug-16 08:29:12
J52 Mon 08-Aug-16 08:54:20
Lillie Mon 08-Aug-16 09:00:52
Luckygirl Mon 08-Aug-16 09:36:47
Lisalou Mon 08-Aug-16 09:38:07
JackieBee1 Mon 08-Aug-16 09:53:29
Lisalou Mon 08-Aug-16 10:17:03
Ziggy62 Mon 08-Aug-16 10:26:23
harrysgran Mon 08-Aug-16 10:28:23
radicalnan Mon 08-Aug-16 10:30:44
Lillie Mon 08-Aug-16 10:37:08
Christinefrance Mon 08-Aug-16 10:38:05
J52 Mon 08-Aug-16 10:54:55
mutti Mon 08-Aug-16 10:57:08
rosesarered Mon 08-Aug-16 10:59:17
ajanela Mon 08-Aug-16 11:04:27
J52 Mon 08-Aug-16 11:07:21
J52 Mon 08-Aug-16 11:09:15
DotMH1901 Mon 08-Aug-16 11:10:15
Legs55 Mon 08-Aug-16 11:43:53
Diddy1 Mon 08-Aug-16 11:49:45
Retrolady Mon 08-Aug-16 11:51:34