To hav3 had enough of Harvey Weinstein on the radio

Not all men are lecherous , some are. Not all women are easy lays, some are.

I don't think the point to Mayim's piece was to blame the victim for the man's behaviour.

Just a word of support for Gracesgran who seems to be on the receiving end of a level of criticism here that isn't in my view justified. She most certainly did not suggest that mothers are to blame for their sons behaviour.

I'm struggling with some of the judgemental comments about other women, about 'lifestyles' that many have criticised but they have the right to live as they choose. That's exactly the line taken by many agencies and individuals towards the young women/children involved in making so called lifestyle choices when they were being groomed and sexually exploited in Rochdale. Strong personal boundaries are one thing, cold and critical comments about women who make serious allegations another.

Unlike some on here, Annie, I blame no one but the perpetrators of these crimes but I am ashamed of the comments made by other women who blame the victims and therefore make life less safe for all.

GracesGranMK2, I don't think anyone here victim shamed or victim blamed. The predator was blamed.

GG, no one has blamed victims but I do not believe all women who claim abuse are victims.

In honesty can you claim there has never been false claims of abuse? We recently had a thread of a woman who claimed she had been raped by several men, one man served a prison sentence , she was found to have lied .

I really believe some women want fame so badly they will be willing to have sex for the chance of a step on the ladder of fame .

I also believe there are men who think women are on this earth for his sexual pleasure .

In this case I don't believe all the claims . Why if he found it so easy to interview women in a hotel room or an office did he stalk the Anthony woman to here home ? Why not an hotel room as others have claimed

I will await the findings of the police forces, I hope he doesn't get off with anything he is guilty of but I also hope he isn't found guilty on a false allegation.

me too....

"Women and men across the country are participating in the social media campaign #MeToo to raise awareness for sexual harassment and assault.

It started on Twitter, where actress Alyssa Milano encouraged women to reply "me too" if they had experienced sexual harassment or assault "to give people a sense of the magnitude of the problem."

In just under 24 hours, the tweet garnered nearly 48,000 replies, with the movement also taking hold on other social media networks."

I wonder how many of us would reply - me too?

I wonder how many are wracking their brains trying to recall an unpleasant chat up line so they can say - me too

I am sure that for everyone who feels they can Iam there will be many other who still feel they can't.

I wonder what abut those of us who have never experienced sexual harassment, are we then supposed to think there is something wrong with us? Or could it simply be that we accept there are unpleasant people in the world? In my early teaching career I was much more scared of some of the women I met who had been in teaching for years, and were very able to put you down, and would, if they imagined you were getting a bit above yourself, than I was of any of the men (who were often the headteacher). These women were very critical, was it harassment? I don't think so it was just someone being unpleasant.

A clumsy chat up line is now sexual abuse. I experienced bottom pitchers, the arm a little too long around your waist if looking at a newspaper, was I sexually harassed?

Rubbish, no I was not, just told them where to go.

the one place where I have been reduced to tears , really hurt ? gransnet

Yes let's not forget that some w

Sorry, phone is a bit erratic today. Let's not forget that some women have made false accusations too, in other cases. Lynette Antony was mentioned, I couldn't understand why she later went out to dinner with the man who allegedly raped her. I'm not supporting HW at all he seems a very unpleasant predator. However there does need to be some balance

OMG does that mean all the young men I met who tried to proposition me or invite me out were actually harassing me? I just thought they were a bit sad and inexperienced. And actually I wasn't very nice to some of them. Well at least now I know they deserved it. But who knew???

The Victoria programme. A woman worked on a building site, it was said to her best she didn't wear tight jeans because it could cause comments. This suggestion was harassment !

I wonder what abut those of us who have never experienced sexual harassment, are we then supposed to think there is something wrong with us?

What a strange thing to say. I am trying to understand what you are suggesting trisher.

When my daughter (who is was then and therefore is now, severely dyslexic) had just been through all the bullying by people in power (teachers sadly in this instance) and we were sorting out what could be done, another eight or nine year old started shouting at her saying it wasn't fair - why couldn't she be dyslexic too. Obviously she could be forgiven because she did not understand but surely you are not saying it's not fair because you don't feel you are not getting enough attention?

A little understanding of how lucky you have been would really help. I do see the need you have to try and make the world a place where if you obey the right rules you will be safe as that is very comforting but it is simply not true. Life - and the extremes of humanity such as the predatory male - do not work by the rules we would think are reasonable.

Why does one man hide his daughters in a cellar for years regularly raping them. Why do people like Ian Bradey exist and get away with things for years. Why do predators like Jimmy Saville get away with what may have been hundreds of incidence of abuse. It is because they do not feel the need to obey any rules - none that you can imagine or put in place.

Other than locking women away - and then you may be locking them up with a familial predator - yours is not the answer to this problem. Society will not be able to deal with this until it accepts what may initially seem unacceptable and listen to the women who have been abused. Your old wives tales simply will not work.

Too many errors but hope it is readable.

I wonder if you understand anything GGMk2. Anything I post is just a reason for you to go off on a rant about something totally irrelevant. Still if it makes you happy.
What I am saying is that if we make harassment the norm we are saying women who are not harassed are in some way different. Perhaps we should be asking instead why do some women want to be portrayed as victims and not as strong women?
You are as usual reading things into my posts that aren't there. And actually I don't know why I bother replying to you. You seem to want to make women victims. I want them to be lionesses.

What was irrelevant? People - mainly women - are being abused. Your answer is to stick to old wives tales about how women must protect themselves. Mine is to understand that we need to make it culturally unacceptable for men to behave in this way. Yours has never worked and allows those who are mentally ill to be extreme abusers. Why not just think there may be another way rather than putting all the responsibility and blame on women as your posts do.

If a woman is abused she is, at that time, a victim. You now appear to be blaming me for behaviour of others, just by talking about it and not agreeing with you! Blaming me for abuse that I cannot control - any more than the women can by dressing demurely, etc.

trisher I’ve given up trying to make that point (about portraying women as victims) and refuse to reply to any of these incoherent rants. There are those who read things into posts which were never said or intended but that’s because they are simply incapable of listening

If I come across this in RL I just walk away.

No one has asked women to dress demurely. No one has said women aren't sometimes victims
No one has suggested it is culturally acceptable for men to abuse women. No one has blamed women.
You seem to live entirely in a fantasy world where you make up things to suit your own preconceptions. Try actually reading some of my posts. Try understanding that women can be strong, and women can do what they wish, that women can stand up and say they will not be victims. That they will not subject themselves to a culture that asks them to change their appearance to fit a pre-conceived standard. That they can shout and scream from the rooftops that they are lionesses and not to be messed with.
It doesn't mean abuse will stop. It doesn't mean there won't be false abuse allegations. It does mean women will be strong, resourceful and powerful and reap rewards from this.
Could you also try sticking to the subject- we've had dyslexia mentioned and now the mentally ill. I assume you don't want to discuss disability rights with me so please refrain from bringing such things into the debate. It has absolutely nothing to do with gender.

Could you also try sticking to the subject- we've had dyslexia mentioned and now the mentally ill. I assume you don't want to discuss disability rights with me so please refrain from bringing such things into the debate.

Get you. What happened to the last person you spoke to like that trisher? Oh yes, they were your colleagues when you went into teaching and they wouldn't let you get away with it by the sound of it either.