Thank yous

Many years ago I received a parcel containing the return of the gifts I sent to my pal's children. This was her way of teaching them no TY letter: no gifts. I was not amused but she explained that I was the only one who might support her in her efforts to teach her children manners or good practice or whatever. Radical and unnecessary in my opinion. It didn't happen twice and I honestly can't remember if I received TY letters after that. Certainly didn't stop the gifts.

I'm with Kim19 on this.

I used to send Christmas and birthday money to members of the extended family and had to chase for acknowledgement.
That stopped last year. I don't need the hastle!

I didn't give or receive anything that wasn't handed over personally. Grateful thanks were expressed at the time. My three year old grandson is encouraged to say thank you over the phone if I send anything to him through the post. That's good enough for me.

One of the reasons I so appreciated the thank you note was because I had sent a gift to baby no1. For decades I sent baby's mum gifts and then money when in college always I acknowledged. I felt as she had "grown up" and was subtly being thanked for giving all these years. I had not ever stopped giving because that is my pleasure but this thank you meant a lot - the gift was not large but I hoped appropriate. That is also why I said it would make me continue to be generous BUT enthusiastically generous.

I sometimes think that because it IS so easy to get in contact usually, people put things off thinking 'Oh, will message/text/skype/email them later, and then promptly forget. When I told my gdaughter that she had forgotten to thank me and that I had been worried, she was so sorry, and the next week I got a very lovely box of chocolates, and she has never forgotten since!
I don't always think that its because they're horrible/rude/don't care, I think its because life seems to move at a much faster pace (if that makes sense!) and some (not all!) do genuinely forget because of how busy and in a rush most people are. xxx

Always unacknowledged

I agree, life is so fast nowadays, that is why thank you notes and texts were so much appreciated.

I handed over envelopes to my son on 22 Dec containing cash for his two teenage children ( his suggestion to me when I asked ) I have not seen them since as they then went away for over a week.
By yesterday I decided to text him asking them to let me know what they had bought or if they were saving it. He replied that they had opened everything and lost track of who gave what. I don’t see why that stopped them thanking me for the money. Until last year their mum dutifully wrote to thank me on their behalf. I expected them to do it themselves by now. Text or iMessage acceptable.

My daughter sits her children down and supervises the writing of thank you letters, though as I saw the the GCs to hand over presents I didn’t expect or get a written thank you.
My niece has written me a thank you note on her small son’s behalf. My nephew has not. Might not bother sending to his family next year.
Do I detect a trend of more females than males saying thank you?

I am totally fed up with some of the younger generation not bothering to acknowledge any gift in any way. If you don't receive thanks - whether it is by phone, email, text or card - how do you ever know it's arrived at the home of someone who may live at a distance? let alone get a hint that it might or might not have been the right thing?
I no longer buy for any adult who cannot be bothered to acknowledge a present from me. I still buy for their children who cannot be held responsible for others' rudeness. But I do not spend the money or time on this activity that I used to.