Or even a bit precious? Mother of the Bride outfit.

I never read anything so ridiculous...glad you haven't got anything too serious worry about!

Some posters need to take a chill poll.

W11girl that was cruel and unnecessary. If you feel like that why say anything at all?

I wish I was size 14.

Marion I don't think you are being precious at all and I imagine many of us appreciate that when photos are taken you'll want to look good. As MOB you'll feature in lots of front row ones, so the outfit IS important. And yes, I worry that my shape isn't what it was and try to half cover myself in photos by edging in behind someone else! The MOB cannot do this, so yes, dilemma.

You haven't bought an outfit yet, so stop worrying about what the other woman will be wearing at her wedding. Keep an open mind and keep looking. Find a colour that suits and jazz up your outfit with lovely jewelry, good accessories and freshly done hair and make-up - all things to give you confidence.

One of the nicest wedding outfits ever was worn by a dear friend a few years ago. She went for a dark violet dip-dyed cheesecloth dress that hung loosely over her figure and wore it with an enormous hat and big dangly earrings. She smiled brightly in all the photos and really looked fabulous. It wasn't conventional but looked quite sophisticated. She received lots of compliments and the outfit didn't break the bank.

Good luck.

I would ditch the original plan, choose something completely different and let your 'friend' and her respective friend fight it out between themselves and in future keep your ideas a secret. This from someone who spent £200 on a hat for daughter's wedding and never wore it again ?

You are making the assumption that thinner is always more beautiful. It definitely isn’t and as others have said, this is the brides day. Just find something you enjoy wearing that fits the occasion and enjoy the day.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

I confess finding these MoB, MoG, dressing dilemmas puzzling. I have only ever been the MoG and only once. I looked for something nice but useful, couldn't find it so made subtle alterations to something I had bought for a special occasion several years previously. I told the happy couple and MoB in advance and none of them were remotely bothered. MoB and I agreed not to wear hats, neither of us wanted to.

Once I got dressed on the day, I felt comfortable and suitably dressed and then stopped thinking about my clothes, nobody was interested anyway. It was the bride and groom, and possibly the bridesmaids everyone was interested in. It was a lovely day. 15 years later the bride and groom are still together and happy with two lovely children. Who cares what the bride and groom's mothers were wearing at their wedding?

That’s lovely Bbnan?

Just not worth stressing about! Choose your outfit, enjoy wearing it and the day. Let her do the same!

Thanks for the nice messages of understanding. Deeply regretted posting when I read some others but hey, ask an honest question and get an honest answer.

Of course you are being precious but every body has those moments and it just goes to show how important it is to you. Instead of worrying about the outfit (which I am sure would look just as good on you as her), work on your self-esteem. Keep telling yourself that you look good with your weight loss. Having lost 2 stone myself, I know how much hard work that takes and you should be congratulating yourself on that. If it really bothers you, take yourself down to Debenhams or John Lewis and get their personal shoppers to help you find something that really shows you off to your best advantage. I did that when I was mother of the groom and I am really glad I did. I felt 10 years younger on the day...not sure the photos proved it but hey ho, I had a fabulous day feeling like a glamour puss and you can't put a price on that!

I totally agree...it is their day but you need to put your 2 feet forward and enjoy it too..it does not come too many times in life..r,joy and be proud too.

I was size 12-14 when I was MOB and that felt just right. I wore a slim fitting skirt (well slimmish) and a long jacket which skimmed over any bumps!
High heels which made me stand tall (abandoned after the photos) and a largish hat which was fashionable then.

She won't be standing next to you - just check that the MOG doesn't clash with colour.

When a small size 12, I bought a top from M and S and was wearing it out one day when a woman (approx size 20) walked towards me wearing the same top. As she and her friends passed me one of them whispered to her "it looks much better on you dear" and what's more it did!

Buy an outfit you feel comfortable with and not too tight. Nothing worse than a tight fitting dress stretched over a big tum or bum (I know I've done it). It will be the thing that shows up on all the photos. Be comfortable, feel comfortable and enjoy the day and your beautiful daughter.

No how you feel in your outfit is important too. Luckily your dc is getting married first so you will have first pick and even if the friend of a friend chooses something similar it won't matter. Go for really smart accessories too.

The shop was in Corbridge Tegan, I haven't bought anything there for 8 years so I don't know if they still have the same large selection.

Oh I think I know that one Harrigran, I tried on lots of things with a view to one of the Dds’ weddings. Is it still there? Very tempting!

So long as you are comfortable and feel good, that's all that matters. 'Don't sweat the hard stuff'. I've been MoB 3 times. For one wedding I only bought my outfit the week before. Saw it in a shop window as we were driving out of Cheltenham, DH parked on the double yellows, I rushed in tried it on and the deal was done in less than 8 minutes - without a parking ticket too . The only tip I would give you is to have a 2nd pair of comfy shoes.. essential in my opinion!

The shop is there Maw, I know because DD of my sister's neighbour owns it, I just don't know what she stocks at present. When I shopped there she sold a lot of floaty silks, but DS's wedding was August.
When I went to the palace it was November so I went for a heavier fabric and bought a Basler suit.

Ah yes, the second pair of shoes! I attended the wedding of a friend's daughter and wore new shoes which grazed my feet after an hour. Very painful! Fortunately we had gone by car and I had put an older (but still ok) pair into the boot so hubby was sent to swap my shoes over. I never wear new shoes to any event now. Might be a good idea to get shoes in advance and wear them around the house a few times.

I went to that shop in Corbridge. The woman was so intimidating I walked straight out again

I really don't think it's worth worrying about.

I think you need to feel comfortable and a smarter version of your usual self - just avoid looking like Hyacinth Bucket.

You shouldn't worry too much unless your daughter is marrying into the Royal family. Apparently Carol Middleton ordered an outfit then changed her mind when she saw something she preferred. Although she paid in full for the first outfit she was still criticised. I thought what she wore looked just right.