Lilyflower - yes, I like and love my daughter very much - it's Amazon wish lists I have a problem with
What were the first ever records that you bought and when?
Parents-in-Law. What do/did you call them?
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SubscribeMy daughter's 40th is coming up soon and I've been pointed to a 'Wish List' she's put online Amazon, giving clear instructions as to what she wants for presents.
This has been a regular feature within the family for a couple of years now - birthdays, Christmas, weddings, etc...what to buy for them? Well, look on their Amazon Wish List.
I enjoy choosing gifts, and in the past have stubbornly refused to comply with The List (usually I find the requested presents far out of my price range, or I have no idea what they exactly are.). When they were little they used to write Father Christmas a present list, but this was for little things, like gerbil wheels - now I'd need to save up for a year before I could buy anything for them. My daughter's say the Wish List is an excellent idea because that way the recipient gets what they want (that's of course if I've managed to work out exactly what it is) rather than something that (to them) is useless.
I can feel the rebelling feeling tingling in my toes and I'm about to get on me bike and cycle into town to look for something I think she'll like for her birthday.
GN'rs - please stop me now if you think I'm doing the wrong thing (I need the exercise anyway.
Lilyflower - yes, I like and love my daughter very much - it's Amazon wish lists I have a problem with
I’m with Boheminan and * Bluebelle*. I’m not comfortable with asking for gifts, far less making a list of things I want. I just think it seems a bit mercenary ( even though you know people will give a gift anyway) To me, a lot of the pleasure of receiving a gift is appreciating the thought and effort which went into it. I just like to keep my ears open for clues as to what would be appreciated.
When our children were young, we never did the ‘ letter to Santa’, just always told them that Santa always brought good things, and it would be a nice surprise, and, of course, the ears had been open for weeks before!
So pleased there’s still a few of us ....it’s just no fun and so impersonal and I totally agree Bohenminan it seems greedy and materialistic
It doesn’t mean you have to buy something your friend or relation doesn’t want you listen, you observe, you pick up hints. I don’t even mind someone saying I really like so and so but there is still that little element of will I get it or not left an Amazon list is so cold so lacking in love and care and so clinical
If I was you I d get an idea from the list then go buy it from a hands on shop do it up nicely What next ? hire someone to wrap them up for you or does Amazon do that too
Yuk not an ounce of feeling going into this way of present giving just your money
I'm fed up with getting things I did not ask and do not want. Ungrateful perhaps but the local charity gets a Christmas Bonanza every year. I keep saying don't buy for me and I won't buy for you. Miserable so'n'so may be but you get to a certain age when you just don't want more things.
For my wife we get things throughout the year as we see things. For my children and grandchildren cash or vouchers. I don't expect them to get for me.
This is wrong! I don't think we should encourage the sad culture of ME-ME-ME. How would a bunch of wild flowers and a big hug go down?!
Cindersdad, maybe you could give them a wishlist of charities they can choose to donate to?
Maybe ones that provide a card to you saying that a goat or toilet, or whatever, has been bought.
Here's one to start you off
www.toilettwinning.org
Always ask for lists nowadays. I hate the thought of wasted money which is all an unwanted present is. But always insist that, "the list" encompasses all sizes of pocket book. If I look at a birthday or Christmas list and there isn't a good range of prices I contact the DC concerned and let them know that nothing will be bought until that state of affairs is rectified.
I wouldn't make a priced list like Amazon, but as I said preparing a wish list as guidance, where people are free to choose something on it or not and buy it where they will does seem sensible.
My lovely MiL was always buying us all things she thought we would like and we would thank her and a year later quietly donate it to charity. Even the children used to look askance at some of the things they got given. DS has never forgotten the beautiful, sweater, scarf and hat combo lovingly knitted in day glo orange. He was about 8 and would volunteer to wear it when she visited and always wore a coat over it if we went anywhere while he was wearing it.
I don't really understand the hatred of lists. They are not a new thing as they have always been a big thing in my family - my waste hating Granny (born in the 1880s) had us writing lists from the time we could write ... and would check the spellings
I would rather give a wanted gift than sometimg that is going to gather dust in a drawer, be regifted or sent directly to the charity shop.
But I guess it depends whether you know the person well enough to go off list. It makes me a little sad when people spend a lot of money on useless gifts - like perfume I'm allergic to or perhaps they are regifting
Maybe I've got my rose-tinted specs on, but weren't presents so much more thrilling and special in the past when we all Just. Had. Less. Stuff? Before anyone thought that another present was what "the person who has everything" could possibly need.
When it was our first DGC's first Christmas we asked for some general ideas. Only to be told that all the presents had been bought and we could go to the house and choose one to give. Needless to say, but I will, DH and I were shocked, upset and downright angry. We'd been so looking forward to browsing round for something he would enjoy. The rug was pulled right out from under our feet. We couldn't express our real feelings as D in L has always been rapid to take offence. I think we said that we'd come and choose something if we didn't find anything first. Believe me we found something that day.?
I have to agree that registries and lists make sense because they are practical.
There is something to be said however, about being presented with a beautifully wrapped box in ribbons (and me having absolutely no idea what's inside). It's the element of surprise that delights me the most!
But you dont know whats inside if you have a list! They could have chosen anything from the list or gone 'off list'! My heart sinks when it's an unknown present though as I have to arrange my face to a delighted smile in case I dont like what's inside. As others have said, we have always used lists in the family (at all prices) , long before Amazon. I'm always relieved when i am given suggestions for gifts for GC.
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