I've worked with addicts and have loved ones whose addiction led to death, or to the breakdown of all their relationships. I know three people very well, who are currently either avoiding or attempting to reduce or stop their alcohol/cannabis habits because they recognise they're on the edge of losing everything.
Without exception, addicts or substance abusers I've known or worked with, had loved ones or families who tried to get them to see their substance/alcohol use was no longer "recreational" but dominating their lives. My sympathies go to anyone in the situation of trying to support a loved one. When someone I loved died young as a result of alcohol (and drug) abuse, I felt my heart would break. For the previous 20 years I, and all the others in this persons life, had encouraged them to seek help, spent endless hours talking about the problem. As others have said, only the addict can make the change and they have really want to because of course, giving up anything is difficult.
I do not see addiction as an illness and agree with others here, that is isn't necessarily helpful to call it an illness. None of us would choose to have chronic or life threatening illnesses. We have less choice over that than whether to continue drinking/taking drugs, when everyone around us is asking us to get help.