Is this out of order?

The mother shouldn't have even asked the kid the question - she should have picked up the child, and sat it on her knee. Poor parenting.

If you ask a small child "Do you want to . . .?" then you will get one of two answers - yes or no - and probably no. If you as a mother, want something specific to happen, you don't ask an open-ended question.

The conclusion we must reach here is that the mother was not seriously trying to be helpful and neither was she trying to teach the chld that they should let a tired or elderly adult sit down.

You are not wrong at all. It is typical of younger parents not wanting to squash their children's decisions, right or wrong. I would never have allowed that situation had it been my child, the mother should have quietly been spoken to. I would have done, however unpleasant it may have made the journey.

I always understood on public transport if there is a non paying passenger they should not occupy a seat if none are available for paying passengers. So the child should have been made to give up seat at least imo. Mine would certainly have been given no option. Changed days, its all about making their life easy not wa.ting the hassle of dealing with tantrums or looking up from their phone.

In the case of this toddler I agree 100%. However I have heard it said that if an older child stands and the bus lurches it could get its teeth knocked out and the parents would sue the bus company! No matter that in 74 years I have never known of a single case where that has happened

Yes you are BU! show some consideration yourself. This child is teaching you to take it to the next level, not sticking at a purely superficial behavioural level like your generation was so fixed on. Lots of pensioners are very entitled when it comes to seats maybe she’s just copying them?

I'm afraid rude and entitled people produce rude and entitled families and, when their 'cute' toddlers grow up to be uncontrollable teenagers, they just shrug their shoulders and can't understand how that happened.

A good way of dealing with it jura2 - I can easily stand so would have just glared!

Isn't it wonderful when we all agree

I would have gone one further, Blencathra, and plonked myself next to the child in the hope the mother wuld pick hm/her up and put on her knee. Recently had 2 knee replacement and would have told her that.

Whether the child had paid for the journey is not the point. Plenty of Gransnetters travel for free on certain buses, as do some disabled people, but that doesn't mean they should all stand! It's about making full use of all the seating, including laps if necessary, at busy times.
I totally agree that the child shouldn't have been consulted. It's effectively saying, "Shall we be kind and fair, or would you rather be selfish?" It should be one of those things that isn't negotiable, like wearing a seatbelt or not throwing food around in a restaurant. The problem is how to deal with it, and I suppose most of us would just remain standing and glare.

But the bottom line is that you can ask all you like- if there is no one in authority to back you up to enforce it you can't actually make them.

I would also have asked Mr. Boon to move so I could sit.
Don’t know if any of you saw this story about him spreading stuff on the train while commuters had to stand!
Selfish man?

We can have post after post saying what ought to have been done but the mother didn't and there was no way of making her.

Another example of mad parenting and bad manners - there are times when children need to be told 'no' or 'you can't have that/do that' etc. No wonder society is filling with people that expect to get their own way every time, have a strange sense of entitlement, think their opinion is more important than that of others, and have a big selfish hole that could be occupied by common sense and a few basic manners.

Me too

No some parents are afraid to cross their toddlers dogsmother in case a temper tantrum ensues. I travel on public transport with my DGS aged 3. If it is busy he is warned before hand that he will have to give up his seat if adults are standing. I still ask "Will you come and sit on my knee now please". He often says "I don't want to." and still gets picked up and plonked on my knee where he squirms for a bit and then settles down for a cuddle he said he didn't want.

I know this is going to be unpopular however....nothing is ever as it seems. The parent could have had issues that you were unaware of, there are always unseen things and maybe just maybe it was something like that.
I have asked people to move their bags so icould so5 down before and I think if the child was asked rather than picked up automatically it must have been for a reason as if it was so so a natural parent would surely do this?

The mother had a legal obligation to surrender the street! Under 5's are carried free on buses on the proviso that they do not occupy a seat! The driver should have enforced this!

Printed notice on Midland Red buses when I was young saying Children travelling at half fare do so providing they do not occupy a seat while an adult is standing! It usually worked.

Cressdale. Totally agree child should have been moved onto mother's lap without a second thought.

I love my bus pass, and use it often. I think it's a wonderful idea.

However as gran to a 2 yr old who does take her on the bus, I live in fear and dread of a 2yo tantrum in any confined space. Yes we've got to the stage where lungs grow with intermittent but regular practice. How can little lungs generate so much noise? I suspect that maybe that was what was in mum's mind.

Child should not have been asked. Should have just been picked up and put on lap.

Bring back conductors!

This child is being taught that being selfish is acceptable.

Children's rights .