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2hrs of Sex!!!!!!( lighthearted)

(130 Posts)
Bridgeit Thu 04-Jul-19 16:07:39

Apparently there is a new potion available for men ,which allegedly works for 2hours .....2hrs, what wrong with 2mins😳?

sodapop Thu 04-Jul-19 19:52:59

Doodle grin
I agree with Lilypops time to bring out War and Peace which I never got round to reading.

DazedAndConfusedByLife Thu 04-Jul-19 20:52:37

2 hours? Blimey I've only to mention sex and suddenly he has a urgent job to do at the far end of the garden! grin

I have my ways and means to keep the garden looking good wink

blossom14 Thu 04-Jul-19 20:56:41

Many moons ago one of the men I worked with told me that women were capable of experiencing orgasms lasting up to 40 minutes! I replied I would be probably be dead after the first 2 minutes.

Callistemon Thu 04-Jul-19 21:02:26

grin
^what's wrong with two minutes'? grin

After the thread about Jeremy, Jeremy and Boris this is (almost) too much.

grumppa Thu 04-Jul-19 21:49:00

Do these timings include foreplay?

annsixty Thu 04-Jul-19 21:54:27

I thought most men's idea of foreplay was " how about it"
Thats 10 seconds used up.

grumppa Thu 04-Jul-19 22:20:35

Someone's been meeting the wrong men, annsixty!

Bridgeit Thu 04-Jul-19 22:32:33

Thanks ladies for sharing your lovely , humorous observations. We can now lay back & think of each other 😄but make sure you don’t giggle !

SynchroSwimmer Thu 04-Jul-19 22:34:21

I too misread it as “new position” 😂

Anyway - we need a link - so we can see what it’s all about.

Asking for a friend....

52bright Fri 05-Jul-19 01:00:37

If I am going to have to keep going for 2 hours never mind phone a friend I will have to ask the whole audience how grin

GrauntyHelen Fri 05-Jul-19 01:39:21

only two hours- we prefer a marathon to a sprint

Daddima Fri 05-Jul-19 09:43:58

ann, one of my colleagues alleged that her husband’s idea of foreplay was to ask, “Will I keep them in or take them oot”.

Referring to his dentures, obviously.

blondenana Fri 05-Jul-19 09:49:57

Oh dear,i read it as new position too, i thought that might be very uncomfortable shock

sodapop Fri 05-Jul-19 10:05:54

I always like the line from Mrs Doubtfire, his idea of of foreplay was
" brace yourself Effie ".😂

Nansnet Fri 05-Jul-19 11:05:02

Well, next time hubby suggests it, I'll put the timer on to wake me up at around 1:58 ... he'll never know!

Rolypoly55 Fri 05-Jul-19 11:06:40

Lol, so funny....

Wren5 Fri 05-Jul-19 11:06:43

Lol..grin..Hysterical..

Lindaloulabel Fri 05-Jul-19 11:18:30

One of the best topics to make me laugh out loud for a long time.
You people are so witty and funny.
Made my day.
😂😁😂

EllieB52 Fri 05-Jul-19 11:24:19

Sex? What’s that?

Atalaya Fri 05-Jul-19 11:26:07

My partner of 20 years (both in our late 60s) has been impotent for nearly five years. Previously we had enjoyed a very active sex life.
He also seems depressed (cause or effect?), but refuses to discuss it or seek help. He won’t even cuddle, practically wears a suit of armour in bed, and sleeps on the edge of his side.
I love him as much as ever but don’t want to be celibate for the rest of my life without any physical contact apart from a quick peck on the cheek.
Any ideas?

Daisymae Fri 05-Jul-19 11:34:46

Well yes, talk to him about how you feel. Choose a time when you are both relaxed and maybe have some suggestions for how some intamacy can be restored. If he refuses you only have 2 options, but you will have tried.

jaylucy Fri 05-Jul-19 11:36:10

You really think that any man would be able to carry on for 2 hours without falling asleep half way through??

BusterTank Fri 05-Jul-19 11:38:55

What is sex ? I thought it was something that posh people carry there potatoes i n . I rather have a piece of chocolate cake and a cup of tea .

Bridgeit Fri 05-Jul-19 11:43:03

If you say to him that you desperately need a cuddle ( not in bed) how does or would he react ? If he won’t even consider that , then you have tell him that things can’t go as they are, ie does he want to end up living separate lives ?
Sometimes it’s good to write a letter, & perhaps he would find it easier to write his feelings down. Best wishes

Atalaya Fri 05-Jul-19 11:43:40

Hi
My partner of 20 years (we’re both in our late 60s) has been impotent for the last four years. Previously we shared a very happy and mutually satisfying sex life but now he won’t even cuddle.
He is appears depressed (cause or effect?) but won’t talk about it or seek help, just says he’s old and tired.
We still sleep together, him on the far side of the bed in a virtual suit of armour and pulls away if I even touch him.
I don’t want to spend the rest of my life celibate and without any physical affection at all.
Any ideas?