Our Son in Law seems to have everything so it's very hard to find him a good gift. He enjoys family game night (board games) and when on vacation he often goes to casinos where he usually wins.
After an exhaustive search in the stores and on line, I found a (rather expensive) and very well made, (beautiful) wooden roulette wheel, complete with green felt play pad and other accessories...perfect for game night with (adult) friends or family.
At Christmas he unwrapped the box, looked at it and made no effort to open it or even take it out to examine it. He thanked me politely then put it aside. Mortified, the next day, I asked my D if he hadn't liked his gift. She told me NO, that he wanted gift cards so he can buy some things that he really needs. I later saw my gift sitting by the garage door, as though it was about to be tossed or donated, so I told them I would return it and brought it back with me. I intend to buy him his much coveted gift card with the money but I'm now changing my mind. He made no effort to even open it, so why make the effort to appease him either? He got a gift..he didn't like it, he rejected it..... so be it. I should add that we have a good relationship and he's a wonderful Son in Law. His one flaw is that he can be insensitive to the feelings of others.
Now that I've returned it, I"m doubting my own expectations and my actions. Have rules changed when it comes to gift giving and receiving? Was it presumptuous and selfish of me to give something of MY choosing? What do polite people now do when they are disappointed with a particular gift....Is it now OK for a gift to be 'thrown back' without any show of appreciation or pretense? What do you think about all this? What would you do?
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