People showing off on facebook

Might be difficult for you at the moment but like all things, it will pass. Having looked after my terminally ill husband until he died after 4 years of suffering, then sorting my brother;s affairs when he died, all the while receiving social media photos of my friends enjoying exotic cruises and holidays ..and getting postcards, when I could go nowhere ( all this was preceded by 10 years of cancer and three long sessions of chemo) .....now it is my turn ...obviously I would prefer to have my husband and my brother still....but now I don't know how long I may have left ....so here goes...time for ME to post the pics (As I 'speak' I am on the ferry to Amsterdam for a few days....then to Menorca, the Antarctic , and Russia (cancelled from this year)...Christmas in Venice....fingers crossed for not having to quarantine when I get back ....but I bought a holiday home by the sea so if I do that is where I will be (my mobile contact tracing phone will be at home ....I have another !)....so to all those who are upset by social media ...a) don't look at it, or b) think positive thoughts !

If your sister is unlucky enough to be burgled during her absence, she will be in part responsible for drawing attention to the fact her house is empty.

Gosh, it’s her FB page she can put what she likes, pretty self attitude from you. If you don’t like it unfriend her then you won’t see it. Sorry to hear you partner is in well best wishes for you all.

I find it incredible that anybody would begrudge other people their happiness because they are going through a hard time. I love to see my friends and family enjoying themselves. It makes me feel happier knowing that they are happy.
People don't tend to post their troubles on Facebook because they are then slammed for being miserable or looking for sympathy. It isn't just a bragging platform. It is one where my family and friends who are the other side of the world can see our kids growing up, make each other laugh and feel that we are still in touch. I rarely post photos of me (and certainly not as a pouting trout like some) but somebody once said that when her Mum died, she had few photos of her because her Mum hated having her photograph taken. I decided I would make sure that there were a few of me so my offspring and their's can memorialise the my timeline and remember me if they want to.

I really don’t think you’re being over sensitive but do think you need to “ have a word” with your sister !!! Anyone on social media knows that the goalposts have changed and that there are things you’ll share with all and things you’ll limit ... your sister probably needs to be educating on how to share posts with certain people ( if she doesn’t feel it’s appropriate to add you ) a sisterly chat is needed here x

All she's doing is posting holiday snaps. Her extended family and friends are most likely interested and happy to see them. It's up to the OP to restrict her Facebook viewing if she can't bear to see her sister's photos.

Life is always going to be difficult for some people, at some time.
That's just how it is.

It doesn't mean everyone should tiptoe around in case it upsets someone.

Did he ask about it. It is in a grey plastic posting bag. It does have my address on back of it

Should that have been a text?

I'd rather stick pins in my eyes than follow the masses on facebook.

Did he ask about it. It is in a grey plastic posting bag. It does have my address on back of it

Eh?

Me too EllanVannin

In response to the OP. When my DH was very ill and on life support , I sometimes used to sit on my own in the hospital canteen or just in the waiting area and look at people talking and laughing, thinking “how dare you laugh when my husband is dying” . I think it’s just human nature.

Oh dear, notjustaprettyface - so sorry to hear about your DH and hope you receive more positive news about his health soon. Sorry if I sound as if i’m judging you, but you do sound like quite a sensitive person. I am sensitive too so I know exactly where you’re coming from and I would be very hurt if I saw those photos on Facebook too. I’m sure your sister doesn’t mean to hurt you. I think she could have thought about your feelings though. Personally, I would not have put holiday photos on Facebook in the circumstances, but not everyone thinks the same. It seems to be the way things are done now. I would avoid looking at Facebook whilst your sister is away. You can always “snooze” her so that you don’t see her posts. I am not a fan of Facebook, but then again i’m quite a private person so I don’t care to post photos on social media. I actually feel quite irritated by people who seem to post every aspect of their lives on social media. But maybe i’m old fashioned!

I am sure there is poem about that Gillybob.

Horrible insensitive response !!?

geekesse

Your own sadness and stress may be leading you to misinterpret your sister’s FB habits. She’s probably just sharing something fun, with no thought of how individuals may read them. So in that sense, yes, you are being a little unreasonable. If it offends or upsets you, just block her posts for a bit.

I hate Facebook. A lot of people only use it to brag and boast which is the reason why I’m not on it as I’m not that sort of person. I like nice things, like doing nice things but these things are for me and my family’s own personal gratification and I do not feel the need to show off to others, especially when some people are going through a hard time. It’s all a false persona anyway, no-one posts when they’re having a bad day. Some people live their lives through it and it’s just pathetic. I never understand why people post photos of their tea either - not interested.

I am truly sorry if I hurt Gilllybob's feelings saying there is a poem about death and loss. I meant quite the opposite. Poems can express feelings better than most.

Thanks to everyone for your answers .
Because there were so many , I couldn’t t reply individually but to sum up , yes I agree that my sister did not do this to hurt me and actually I never though that
I was merely asking if it wasn’t a touch insensitive and thankfully , several of you have said that yes it was insensitive
So I have confirmation of what I thought and the old saying that goes ‘ do unto others as they would unto you ‘ is very true in my mind because , as I said in my original post , if the roles had been reversed , I would not have posted photos of my lovely holiday
Still , we are all different and whether I will have the courage to tackle my sister about it as several of you suggest , remains to be seen
I would like to tell her but equally don’t want to fall out
In the meantime , I will stop looking at Facebook , thanks again everybody for all your replies

In your case Notjust you are right to feel hurt at your sister's insensitivity. When there are problems or illness in my family I restrain from putting photos of holidays etc, mainly because I don't even feel like it. Otherwise fb is a wonderful tool to keep in touch with friends old and new, if used wisely like everything else.

I think you have to accept that in life when you are going through a tough time other peopleb(frirnds/family) are not and visa versa..maybe be happy that someone has had a nice holiday or got a new car etc ...It's best to try to be positive in your life because resentment gets you nowhere apart from making you feel more miserable.

Of course you didn’t hurt me feelings Alexa and what’s more my DH didn’t die . I was told so many times to expect the worst.....today might be the day etc. But 13 weeks on life support and against all odds he lived .

Theoddbird

Did he ask about it. It is in a grey plastic posting bag. It does have my address on back of it

Is this on the wrong thread TheOddBird?

You are going through a bad time, so you will feel vulnerable.
Sadly, there is little that you can do to alter things.
If the posts upset, you ignore them. They are probably not meant to hurt, just an expression of their excitement and enjoyment of the holiday. Don't grudge them that bit of happiness.
We have a family member who seems to delight in putting us down, so nearly all of the time, he is ignored, or minimal contact. He has a vastly different set of values to us, so we let him get on with life. We do miss the contact with his wife, who is a blood relative, and that pains us.
But Life is not fair, nor for the cowardly.
Though he is not near, you still have DH. You are seemingly well.Take comfort from that. Look for the positives.

I know someone who puts her latest designer handbag purchase on FB but then she's not a terribly happy person in real life. Some people do it to make themselves feel better about themselves.