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Unkind comments

(63 Posts)
Quizzer Thu 24-Dec-20 10:13:06

I have the sort of mouth that turns down at the corners when my face is relaxed, mainly due to sagging skin! I am so sick of jokey comments, usually from complete strangers, that I look miserable or should "cheer up". I can't go round with an inane smile on my face all the time!
I now have a standard reply that stops them in their tracks and hopefully makes them think twice in future. I simply say "I am sorry, my sister died today" and walk quickly away (I never had a sister). If I wasn't so indignant about their remark I would love to see their reaction.
Is anyone else plagued by insensitive remarks.

Fecklar Sat 26-Dec-20 06:55:14

I used to get called ‘ smiler’ deadpan and poker face over the years. I don’t have the facial muscles or set of teeth to have a big broad smile or have a large mouth. I have had a hard traumatic upbringing and perhaps that might have something to do with it I don’t know. My DD has a big broad beautiful smile. I don’t feel the need or the urge to go around grinning but I do have a dry sense of humour and can make most people laugh no matter who they are...

Oldwoman70 Sat 26-Dec-20 07:47:21

I have the resting "miserable cow" face so ignore the "cheer up" comments.

The only time I got annoyed is, when younger, meeting new people at a party being asked the usual questions like what do you do etc. Then comes the question "do you have children" when I would answer no I would get the inevitable questions "why is that" or even "whose fault is it". My stock reaction was to say I didn't know them well enough to have that conversation and walk away

Hetty58 Sat 26-Dec-20 08:03:40

I'm practising my resting bitch face right now as I'm usually smiling. I'd never take any notice of silly remarks, just think 'Another idiot'.

I do believe, though, as we age, our faces depend on muscle memory, so tend to show our usual mood. My friend always looks grumpy and/or worried - such a shame.

pmeehan3 Mon 15-Feb-21 15:51:45

Wow. That was insensitive of you. You could have handled it a much better way. Like suggest to help you with something. Ouch.

pmeehan3 Mon 15-Feb-21 15:55:02

That was a response to OceanMama.

Blossoming Mon 15-Feb-21 15:56:29

To whom is your comment addressed pmeehan3?

Blossoming Mon 15-Feb-21 15:58:35

Crossed post.

muse Mon 15-Feb-21 16:17:47

cornishpatsy

My daughter is above average height, when meeting new people they often comment on how tall she is as though she hasn`t noticed.

Same here but it's me that's tall. At 16 I was 6'.1" Still am! Not the 16 bit (I wish hmm). I was too shy then to give a good retort back but I do now.
One of my favourite replies is: "Really, I never knew that. Thanks for telling me"
Or if somebody says "how tall are you?" you say "I don't know, how much do you weigh?"
Hate it when someone stands at the side of me jumping up and down when doing the name calling.

Smileless2012 Mon 15-Feb-21 18:08:42

Great response musegrin.

grannypiper Mon 15-Feb-21 18:31:33

I have a great resting bitch face.

cornishpatsy Mon 15-Feb-21 19:02:34

muse, "...how much do you weigh?" is a great answer. I shall use that when asked any personal question myself.

Meaux Mon 15-Feb-21 19:24:30

When somebody says something insensitive or rude to me I usually say “oh dear, I don’t expect you intended that to sound as rude (hurtful - insert adjective of choice) as it did”.