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Is it appropriate?

(55 Posts)
4allweknow Fri 20-May-22 10:22:49

Dear Daughter died 2019. For the funeral and as per her wishes I bought an outfit I considered she would approve of. DH died last week and his wishes basically the same as DD. The outfit was for me quite expensive and has not been worn since. Would it be considered insensitive to wear the exact same out to DHs funeral.

Sago Fri 20-May-22 10:25:57

I think it would highly appropriate to wear the same outfit.

tanith Fri 20-May-22 10:27:40

Absolutely not, I think would be lovely to wear the same outfit for both very sad occasions. Also one less thing to add to what I’m sure is already a very sad and stressful day.
My condolences on your sad loss. flowers

Aldom Fri 20-May-22 10:34:22

Such a deeply sad time for you 4allweknow. I think you should wear the same outfit as for your dear daughter's funeral. Your husband saw you in those clothes and perhaps he helped you to choose your outfit? My thoughts are with you. flowers

timetogo2016 Fri 20-May-22 10:36:06

I too think you should wear it.
So sorry for your loss 4allweknow.

Yammy Fri 20-May-22 10:37:09

My condolences on your sad loss. It would be a tribute to them both if you wore the same outfit I'm sure your DH would have approved when he saw you in it. Wear it you might never feel like wearing it again but it is a small remembrance of them

crazyH Fri 20-May-22 10:38:54

How sad for you - my condolences to you 4allweknow. - wear the same outfit - flowers

Granny23 Fri 20-May-22 10:39:12

I should think that most of us have a sombre outfit that we keep mainly for funerals - just as most men have a dark suit, white shirt and black tie. Nowadays there is often a request for a favourite colour, or simply something bright to be worn, which can be the usual outfit + a bright blouse or bold scarf.

Squiffy Fri 20-May-22 10:48:31

I think you should wear it, too. If you want to make it a little different, perhaps you could add a silky scarf or brooch? flowers

Patsy70 Fri 20-May-22 10:55:18

Such a sad time for you. I think you should wear the same outfit, 4allweknow. flowers

Greenfinch Fri 20-May-22 11:00:10

I think it is one of the nicest things you could do. Thinking of you at this sad time.

Madgran77 Fri 20-May-22 11:00:56

So sorry about your bereavements flowers

To me wearing the outfit is appropriate x

Vintagejazz Fri 20-May-22 11:00:56

I think it would be perfectly appropriate.

Please accept my deepest sympathies.

Jaxjacky Fri 20-May-22 11:03:05

It will provide a poignant link 4allweknow my condolences ?

Doodledog Fri 20-May-22 11:07:32

Another vote for 'perfectly appropriate' from me.

I'm so sorry for your losses, 4allweknow, and hope the day goes as well as these things can. flowers

Blossoming Fri 20-May-22 11:09:18

It is definitely appropriate, so sorry for your loss.

Luckygirl3 Fri 20-May-22 11:11:58

Sending condolences - I think it would be entirely fine to wear the same outfit, as long as it is one you feel comfortable in.

Grandmadinosaur Fri 20-May-22 11:22:39

Sending my condolences to you. On this sad time for you I would say you are entitled to wear whatever you wish ?

Namsnanny Fri 20-May-22 11:25:42

I think it would be more than acceptable to wear the same outfit 4allweknow for lots of reasons.
If it were me, I would feel as if I had a little connection with my daughter
I'm sure she would have wanted to share and support you had she been able to
Heart felt condolences flowers

Germanshepherdsmum Fri 20-May-22 11:28:20

I’m so sorry. Yes, definitely wear the outfit. As others have said, it’s a link to both of them.?

Aveline Fri 20-May-22 11:28:53

It would certainly be appropriate if you feel comfortable wearing it.

Nanna58 Fri 20-May-22 11:53:30

I agree that wearing the same outfit would ba a little link to your daughter. So, so sorry for your losses x

Caleo Fri 20-May-22 11:53:49

4allwe know, I send you my condolences and hope you continue to manage these sad events so well.

Kim19 Fri 20-May-22 11:55:53

A perfect plan and somewhat unites you all which is emotionally beautiful. ?

pandapatch Fri 20-May-22 12:35:35

Totally agree, please accept my sincere condolences