Relative moving within three doors!

There is nothing you can do about them buying property so close by except have very strong boundaries, physically and mentally. Keep your doors, front and back, locked. Gates locked. Have a Ring doorbell. Make it clear from the start there won't be any 'popping in'. Ask them why they want to suddenly move so close and their answer will reassure you or warn you. I once stayed across the path from my parents and it was lovely as the children were able to go between the houses easily. My parents didn't overstep though. Good luck.

I would not like that at all, I can see that it would take the pleasure out of it.

If they are in a chain you can only hope that theirs falls through. Are there any negatives you could moan to them about that might put them off?

Good advice Grandmabatty !

I can well imagine how you feel, but if they decide to move there, you can’t do much about it.

Have you discussed with them the fact you are hoping to move there, and made it sound so good that they have decided to follow your lead, or is it a spontaneous decision on their part?

If the former, a bit late but ? would have been better.

If the latter, well….

The chances are that you and they will go on living separate lives as you do now. Starting off cautiously, as has been suggested, is a good idea.

There's always the possibility, too, that they won't like living there and will move on.

oh dear.
bit of a coincidence. or not maybe.
did your husband speak too freely and almost suggest it to them?
anyway, what to do. are you committed, have you exchanged contracts. can you get out of it.

I would not like it - that is too close. You also do not want them to see you leave the house at 9 am and not return for many hours leaving them curtain twitching and wondering where you have been!

You really do not like the relative? I would love several close relatives to live next door or very near.
I think they may just be saying this and not really be prepared to sell their house and then buy another near you and may want your reaction to their news before doing anything.
The house they want may sell quickly and they cannot buy it anyway.

My immediate reaction would be to back out of the purchase and find somewhere else, but tell no one.

If necessary continue with your sale and rent to cover the gap.

I have a loving and happy family, including cousins and we have an annual gathering, but if any of them suddenly informed me that they had decided to move near me and had bought a house three doors down, I would be very very wary.

my husband’s close relative

How close?

Brother, uncle, cousin, nephew, son?

Has the relative actually said they are going to move there?
They didn't just say something like "I've chosen my house" as part of light conversation?
(That sort of misunderstanding might sound far-fetched but I've known it to happen.)

Personally it wouldn’t bother me, better the devil you know and all that. It means you only have 2 new neighbours to worry about.

Plus you’ve bought the bigger house? it would be awful if they had got it first!

Thank you for all your comments, at least I don’t feel too guilty, my husband and cousin are more like siblings. Your right it was my own fault for “being over enthusiastic”. It’s also a second home for them for the time being. Fingers crossed they don’t as without doubt they will be in and out all day. ?? I am so grateful for your comments as I am so sad that I have done all the hard work and made it very easy for them to make a purchase without any of the usual hassle.

Shhhh. Mum's the word next time.
Careless Talk Costs Lives

You obviously blabbed you were moving

We discouraged at least one close relative from moving close to us. No regrets.

Why don't people want other people to be close and involved and connected and loving and interactive and being together and living shared lives? Why do you all like living your tiny little lives alone in your little boxes keeping blood relatives away and out of things? I find this resentful, withholding, distancing and lack of familial care and love and warmth disgusting actually and it is a widespread plague. I know it is the norm now but it feels awful to me. Sad and disappointing.

I saw less of my relatives when they moved closer to me than I saw them before. Just the fact they were so close meant that we didn't have to plan like we did before. I wouldn't worry about it if it were me but as Grandmabatty says, put in strong boundaries.

Nightmare! I hope it falls through and you can breathe a sigh of relief. I would hate it personally. After all that research you put into it, and I do know personally how much it takes out of one, this bombshell !!! Somebody should have a word and soon ?‍?

I agree with you Grammy Grammy. I'm apalled at the unfriendliness and talking about having everything locked up and no popping in. Unless the people are truly hideous I don't see a problem.

You could well shake down into an agreeable neighbourliness with the relatives. You don’t sound as if you hate their guts. It’s hopefully just a case of getting used to living so close. Strength in numbers if one of the other neighbours cuts up awkward about something.

I agree with Grammy Grammy - very sad that people feel they don't want family nearby-- maybe they have been lonely and need some family interaction--count your blessings- imagine if there were family who didn't want YOU nearby

When I downsized I moved to a house facing my brother and his wife. I did ask them how they felt about it and they said they had no problems . . . and it hasn't been! I have now lived here 2 years and there have been many advantages eg deliveries, help when sick, etc. The first day or 2 was slightly strange as I felt my curtains needed to be open, etc but that passed quickly. I'm more of a night owl so I live my life, my way and they do the same. Occasionally I pop in for a wee chat or to collect a parcel meant for me or vice versa. I live alone and it's definitely handy to know folk are nearby but we definitely don't live in each others' pockets.

Start as you mean to go on. Invite them over, like oh would you like to come for a bbq Saturday or another time , say If your free Tuesday pop in for coffee… so it’s invitation rather than come anytime … it can be nice having relations close if you are able to have separate lives. I would find it difficult but you’ll have to make a way of making it work or you’ll be stressed and feel smothered x

GrammyGrammy
Many would, as many would not, enjoy living near relatives.
Choice