Gransnet forums

AIBU

About my neighbour ?

(95 Posts)
annsixty Mon 11-Sept-23 11:51:40

Well I suppose I am but I am so cross.
I am an 86 year old widow, I do not live alone, my almost 25 year old GD lives with me but she lives a very busy work and social life as most do at that age.

My neighbour came round this morning to complain about my bins not being put where he wants them put.
For context his house is set back from mine so he can see my garage wall.
I have a fairly lengthy path down the side of my house with a gate at the end.

Since I have become older ,unless someone else does it I leave the bins down the side of my house for ease of moving them.
He came round this morning to say that he is sick of eating his breakfast looking out at my bins and asked that I keep them at the back of the house.
I just said I would see about it.
I wanted to say on the couple of days they are out after being emptied or when the gardeners need access perhaps he could use another chair at the table. However I didn’t wanr to be provocative.

He then carried on to say he is currently having treatment for prostate cancer which he has had for many years but occasionally has treatment for.
I sympathised and went inside.
I was cross first and then very upset.
AIBU or perhaps is he?

JaneJudge Tue 12-Sept-23 17:12:54

He was being unreasonable and I'm sorry it has upset you
I can see lots of my neighbours bins, it hadn't occurred to me to get irritated by them smile

Helenlouise3 Tue 12-Sept-23 18:45:41

I appreciate that your granddaughter lives a busy life, but to avoid any unpleasantness, surely she could move the bins.

Shill29 Tue 12-Sept-23 19:05:32

I can see both sides. Tricky. Presumably this is a recent problem and you used to keep them elsewhere?Could you go back to leaving them in the original place and ask him or someone he lives with to take your bins out for you and put them back? This is what we do with our neighbours!

Grandma70s Tue 12-Sept-23 19:24:40

kwest

If your ring your local council and ask, they will collect your bins and put them back after emptying them. This should solve your problem and keep the neighbour happy too.

This is what I did when I could no longer manage the bins. It worked very well, even though they had to take them up and down my long drive. They got a good tip at Christmas!

Nanatoone Tue 12-Sept-23 21:10:19

This made me sad for you Ann, it’s very unreasonable for him to demand that you move the bins, we all know it’s not a nice sight but he should have offered to move them. I have zero sympathy with his “cancer” diagnosis, my husband lived for nine years with prostate cancer, terminal from day one, we just didn’t know how long. He never once used it to beat anyone with, despite a horrible series of events due to the cancer. If he wants to move them with your permission, so be it. Otherwise, jog on.

CoolCoco Tue 12-Sept-23 21:19:25

I’d hate to look out of my window and see a load of bins, so I sympathise with the neighbour. however, he could have politely offered to move the bins for you as he is bothered by them.

vampirequeen Tue 12-Sept-23 21:41:21

Tell him to bugger off. Your bins on your property.

Hetty58 Tue 12-Sept-23 21:53:58

welbeck, maybe it depends on where you live - but the council binmen do help my friend's mum. She signed up for their disabled service.

They move her bin (and the recycling bins) quite a long way, through her front garden and down the side of her house to their 'home' next to her side door, where she keeps them. They also collect them from there - so it must be about 150 feet in total.

freyja Wed 13-Sept-23 10:49:22

Is there any room to screen off the bins either with potted plants or a screen? Just a thought that might work and cheer everyone up.

M0nica Wed 13-Sept-23 11:09:41

In which case Mr Next Door should do it. He is the one with the problem.

Foxygloves Wed 13-Sept-23 11:21:34

Annsixty this is bullying, pure and simple.
I hope he feels ashamed of himself (but suspect he won’t) if he ever asks you for a favour.
For now, try to ignore him. And on NO account go out of your way to screen your bins or move them - what he looks at is his problem.

GrannyRose15 Wed 13-Sept-23 11:29:13

Beechnut

We had something similar annsixty with our neighbour. Our daughters small camper van was parked up our drive permanently as it had something wrong with it. She came out one day and totally ranted to DH about being able to see it from her kitchen window. Good job she didn’t have the view I had as it was right in front of our window. Camper stayed put I’m afraid.
If it’s easier for you leave the bins where they are. It’s much easier to move a chair!

There is difference here. Whereas there is not likeley to be any direction as to where to put your bins, many house deeds do prohibit the parking or storing of caravans on house drives.

annodomini Wed 13-Sept-23 12:34:42

You are not being unreasonable; he is. You are entitled to put your bins anywhere on your own property and he has no-one he can complain to. You can carry on putting the bins where it's easier for you to cope with them and moving around them. He has no grounds for complaint and if he goes on bothering you, you could justifiably accuse him of harassment. If there's still such a being as a neighbourhood police officer, they could have a word in his ear!

Yearoff Wed 13-Sept-23 13:21:26

Cheeky cf. If it bothers him he can take your bins in and out for you.

Gundy Sun 17-Sept-23 17:46:42

Best post by LondonMzFitz - “Men. Um.” 😂

Pumpkinpie Tue 21-Nov-23 18:05:27

If it bothers him so much suggest he moves your bins as it’s too much for you to do it
That should silence him

jenpax Tue 21-Nov-23 18:19:36

I am amazed at all the tolerant replies😂 He is being a total ** in my opinion! your bins are on your property and none of his business

CanadianGran Tue 21-Nov-23 18:57:06

He needs curtains.

biglouis Wed 22-Nov-23 09:05:49

I have a neighbour with an obsession about bins, drains and rubbish. I wont bother going into the details. We had several stand up rows before I finaly told her to go forth and multiply. Then I got a ring type door bell and just stopped answering the door to her. She came out ready for a whinge and couldnt get an answer. Her evident frustration gave me a great deal of amusement.