AIBU to think that a parent should be able to deal with a 10 year old threatening her with a hammer and garden shears?

BlueBelle

I agree that hitting children with belts etc is child abuse and I should have made that clear in my post. I didn’t intend for it to come across that I advocate such violent means of chastisement.

Yes sounds about right BlueBell I just wanted a bit more insight.

tickingbird

^You can be strict and be a disciplinarian without violence, and if you can't - then you've probably created the 'monster' child yourself!^

Ugh!

Far too much generalisation in this comment and as for the “Ugh!” I think Ugh to that.

I was smacked as a child and I’m not violent at all. My best friend from childhood and her brother were children of Irish immigrants who really did wallop the pair of them, often with belts etc. Neither class themselves as abused children and both are very laid back and not in the slightest bit violent.

As for social services, they do love an easy option. Criminalise decent parents for smacking a child but do nothing for those poor children being brutalised regularly even when reports from concerned relatives and neighbours are received.

Oh, I'm sure a good walloping with a leather belt (or even a plastic one) never does any harm.

I presume that is what you are intending to suggest by your - purely anecdotal - evidence?

tickingbird

I've just seen your later post where you've made it clear that you are not in fact advocating the use of a belt on a child, so I apologise for my above comment.

You gave anecdotal evidence that two people you know were not harmed by the practise - I have anecdotal evidence of one person who was. So you and I obviously have different views - both based on personal experience.

I certainly was generalising in my original post - suggesting that there is a large body of people who believe it's possible to discipline a child without hitting it.

pascal30

we also don't know the effect the cannabis had on the child.. I think tasering is too extreme but these young police officers probably haven't had a lot of experience in violent situations.. I would however question why they were carrying a taser gun.. they should have been taught de-escalation procedures as we were in psychiatric hospitals..

we also don't know the effect the cannabis had on the child

There is that, too.

In fact, there is so much we don't know (as is usual with these cases) that I can't come to any conclusion. The police were faced with a difficult situation - that's the only conclusion I can come to.

The police officer involved was cleared of any misconduct.

Alot of children have a poor diet with sugar highs and lows from breakfast to bed, it's no wonder

It's no wonder they have violent outbursts

Smileless2012

The police officer involved was cleared of any misconduct.

He was cleared by the Met but the IOPC are investigating, the ruling is due tomorrow (Thursday).

The Met recently announced that they would not respond to calls for help with mental health problems. I think they should take the same attitude towards problems with children. They are not qualified to deal with disruptive children and inadequate parents.
If the child had eaten cannabis she needed medical attention, not police intervention.
That said the police shouldn't be tasering children, but I think few people would know how to deal with an aggressive 10 year old who had threatened her mother with a hammer and was now flourishing a pair of shears.

The police are dealing with difficult situations every day though Dickens that is their job and they should be fully trained in how to talk a situation down (in any situation it should be their first line then if that doesn’t work move to next plan etcthat should be a big part of all training )
To taser a young child seems unforgivable to me a 10 year old girl is neither cleverer or stronger than two policemen and a mother no matter what’s she carrying
Unfortunately a lot of police footage I ve seen they go into full ‘warrior mode’ shouting and screaming at the assailant from the first second of meeting

For most 10 year olds, garden shears are large and unwieldy, and, usuall,y so blunt, that you could, in my late MiL's immortal words, ride bare-arsed around the moon on them.

Start with talking and then step forward with an authroatative air and take them from her. It was aaid that she had dropped the hammer by then.

Glorianny

The Met recently announced that they would not respond to calls for help with mental health problems. I think they should take the same attitude towards problems with children. They are not qualified to deal with disruptive children and inadequate parents.
If the child had eaten cannabis she needed medical attention, not police intervention.
That said the police shouldn't be tasering children, but I think few people would know how to deal with an aggressive 10 year old who had threatened her mother with a hammer and was now flourishing a pair of shears.

My experience is that in circumstances where a child is threatening their parent, is out of control with the potential for harm to the child or another person, medics won’t come out unless police officers are also called.
Mum called the police, not a paramedic/GP. There was a danger to the child or others. That’s the kind of mental health situation the police say they will continue to respond to.
The police are often very good at ‘dealing with disruptive children and inadequate parents’

I agree with your point that few people would know how to deal with an aggressive 10 year old who’d threatened her mother with a hammer and was now flourishing a pair of shears

Smileless2012

The police officer involved was cleared of any misconduct.

I have only just come across this thread and I haven’t seen it reported but I’m pleased to hear that the police officer was cleared of misconduct. Other than that, I’m wondering where it was reported as I’ve not seen it. We watch BBC news every day and often ITV. We don’t buy a newspaper though.

Most 10 y-o are as tall or taller than me

Start with talking and then step forward with an authroatative air and take them from her.

I must tell my daughter that this is all she has to do! She'll be so pleased that somebody knows what to do at last. 🙄

Iam64

Glorianny

The Met recently announced that they would not respond to calls for help with mental health problems. I think they should take the same attitude towards problems with children. They are not qualified to deal with disruptive children and inadequate parents.
If the child had eaten cannabis she needed medical attention, not police intervention.
That said the police shouldn't be tasering children, but I think few people would know how to deal with an aggressive 10 year old who had threatened her mother with a hammer and was now flourishing a pair of shears.

My experience is that in circumstances where a child is threatening their parent, is out of control with the potential for harm to the child or another person, medics won’t come out unless police officers are also called.
Mum called the police, not a paramedic/GP. There was a danger to the child or others. That’s the kind of mental health situation the police say they will continue to respond to.
The police are often very good at ‘dealing with disruptive children and inadequate parents’

I agree with your point that few people would know how to deal with an aggressive 10 year old who’d threatened her mother with a hammer and was now flourishing a pair of shears

I think though they aren't good at dealing with disruptive children and inadequate parents. Anyone who has dealt with these sort of families will tell you that once the episode is over the parents will resort to becoming defensive and blaming anyone who intervened. It's a common occurrence when such children are disciplined in schools. The teacher who dealt with the child becomes the target.

He was initially cleared by the Met but the current investigation is by the IOPC, the ruling should be made today.

BBC News - Met Police officer cleared after Tasering girl, 10
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-67576994

Today's verdict.

www.examinerlive.co.uk/news/local-news/marcia-grants-family-let-down-28196922

it's not always easy or straightforward.

bet they wish someone had tasered that boy.

A lot of criticism of parenting skills here, maybe we should walk in their shoes before commenting. If indeed the girl had mental health problems be aware it's very difficult to access services for children and often takes time. Some parents find it harder to cope with children for whatever reason and need support. Maybe we were fortunate in being able to cope with our children's traumas.

Lots of unhelpful advice on how the police should deal with the situation, from people whom I doubt have any experience of police work, let alone dealing with children out of control.
Very relieved that the officer has been cleared.

Iam64

It’s clear from reports that ‘this child had an awful lot to deal with as a young girl’.
biglouis - a good walloping never helped any one, child or adult, to improve their behaviour.

Violence begets violence and it is incredibly stupid naive to suggest that a big person hitting a small person is the solution.

The policeman concerned has just been cleared of misconduct.
If the child was in danger with the weapons at her disposal then a night in hospital after being tasered could have been the best option.
We don’t know the circumstances but it all seems so sad.
So many children just don’t deserve the lives they are born into.