AIBU or do I need to move with the times?

My first thought was - is she able to walk to and from school with classmates who live close by or would she absolutely be on her own?
How savvy is she concerning road safety too and is the route in a well-lit area rather than lanes that might not have street lighting?
I don't think you are being silly regarding worse case scenario - I would too.

How far is the school from her home? And will she be walking alone or with friends?
You have valid concerns, at 9 years old a child is still very small and unless their home is nearby and they have friends walking the route with them, perhaps with an older child, I would find this a bit risky.
In winter as you say it will be dark at 4.15 but one thing you can do is buy your GC a hi vis tunic to wear over her clothes or maybe suggest pick ups just on the days she finishes late?
If the school encourages this I imagine they will be teaching the children Road safety etc., and encouraging them to walk home in groups. The thing is your GC really wants to do this so perhaps just work with the school and parents on finding as safe a way as possible for her to walk home safely.
All the best x

I dont think it is up to the school to make the decision as to what pupils can do.
This is the parents decision to make.
Every child id different and every route is different.
A reasoned judgment needs to be made depending on circumstances.
Talk to her about it, is she happy doing it?
As above, will others be doing the same route?
Use mature judgment.

I dont think the school is saying they must do it, they are saying year 5 pupils can. This is to do with their safeguarding procedures, so if no responsible adult came to collect a year 3, they wouldnt let them leave. They are just stating their position re Year Five pupils.

I'm inclined to agree. I think aged 9/Year 5 is too young. I understand they need to start somewhere, so I guess Year 6, before they move on to secondary school, would be the right time to start. Even then, I'd only be happy if the child was walking with other classmates and not alone. And as long as there aren't any busy main roads to navigate. I just don't think kids are sensible enough at this age, and so many scenarios to worry about them, but I realise we have to 'let them go' at some point. I'm so glad my kids are adults now! Sorry, I know that won't allay your fears, but I think you'll just have to trust that your GD will be sensible and her parents, I'm sure, will lay down the rules of all the do's and don'ts.

I think it best to run through some scenarios with her, and ensure she knows what to do, should anything unexpected happen.

How far is the walk, and even if not with another child, are there likely to be others around, too?
It is a worry, but the best preparation you can give to a child is to get them street wise, rather than keep them away from these things.

She is 9.
I'm sure nobody will just set her off out of the door without any "practice" walks.

If there's no alleyways etc I'd say good for her for wanting to do this.

I wish more schools would encourage this... maybe they are?

the best preparation you can give to a child is to get them street wise, rather than keep them away from these things

Exactly MissA

Can't she walk to school and be collect at the end of the day?

Allowing her a phone might mean that she would be dawdling along, looking at it, so I suppose that's a mixed blessing.

I'm sure I let my girl walk home at that age.

My Gdd1 is now in year 5 and is delighted to be allowed to walk to and from school on her own.* It takes a max of 15 minutes and there’s one major road - with a pelican crossing) to cross. It’s a generally very safe area and a lot of other children at the school live nearby, so often she’s not walking alone.

She does have some after school activities, and after-school club, which will soon mean coming home after dark, but the roads are well lit.

Dd and SiL are happy for her to do it. She has been given an old Nokia ‘dumb’ phone, just in case.

*Not that it’s much help to dd/SiL, since the two younger ones still need to be taken and collected!

Witzend I suppose it's worth it for the independence she feels though. 👍

I would start off with her walking to school in the morning, but I would follow her at a discrete distance for the first few times. I would not allow her to walk home alone on the 3 evenings after activities..

She would learn an important lesson..compromise

Goodness, have you forgotten about our childhoods?

Yes, roads are busier, but at 9 one should be able to cross roads safely.

At 9 I was getting a bus home, with school mates, then walking (alone) Approx 1 mile down a dark country road, no mobiles in those days and no public phone boxes on my route.

Children need to learn to take measured risks whilst growing up, it teaches them the skills they need for life

MissAdventure

I think it best to run through some scenarios with her, and ensure she knows what to do, should anything unexpected happen.

How far is the walk, and even if not with another child, are there likely to be others around, too?
It is a worry, but the best preparation you can give to a child is to get them street wise, rather than keep them away from these things.

👏👏👏

Nansnet, a lot will surely depend on how sensible the child is. Personally I think my Gdd1 is certainly sensible enough, but I’d think twice about Gds, only 15 months younger, but something of a human hurricane, often heedlessly charging along wherever.

More than once I’ve told him that he still needs to LOOK! at the busy road crossing, regardless of the green light, because some drivers are bad or not paying attention, and don’t stop.

Providing she is a sensible child and not wayward. I cannot see the problem. DD walked home from schoo l at 9. A couple of 100 yards but with two major roads to cross at traffic lights and one lights free. DGC also both started walking home at the age of 9

9 soon becomes 10 and 10 becomes 11. By rgw time she reaches 11 and goes to secondary school, she will be confident and conpetent travelling around on her own.

At 11 DGC started walking a mile and a half to school along aa major road. By then she was so confident she organised her own walking train of friends she picked up as she walked to school. It didn't last long as they all began before and after school activities, but in those first few rather scary weeks as she and her friends started at scondary school it was a great confidence booster for all of them.

Cossy

Goodness, have you forgotten about our childhoods?

Yes, roads are busier, but at 9 one should be able to cross roads safely.

At 9 I was getting a bus home, with school mates, then walking (alone) Approx 1 mile down a dark country road, no mobiles in those days and no public phone boxes on my route.

Children need to learn to take measured risks whilst growing up, it teaches them the skills they need for life

Yes I agree with that but would still feel nervous about a 9 year old GC walking home in the dark, I suppose it is not so much because dangers have increased but because due to wider news coverage and stories on social media we have become bombarded with tales of pedophiles and children wielding knives round every corner. My parents were young people during the Second World War, they lived with very real danger every day so when we were kids I imagine they thought letting us walk back and to from school from an early age was no big deal. But times have changed. Perhaps we have come too far down the road of over protecting our children, but is hard to call.

Babs

I agree it’s a tough call and I also understand everyone’s concerns, but we all know we never stop worrying about our children or grandchildren, however old they are.

Arm them with advice and trust them, that’s all we can do

All depends on the child and the route. There is no set age and there are some adults who I don't think should be allowed out on their own.

Jackiest

All depends on the child and the route. There is no set age and there are some adults who I don't think should be allowed out on their own.

😂😂😂

Witzend - some adults can't reliably cross a road!
My mid-30s daughter is a case in point.... But I do think she is an outlier!

Agreed Jackiest

I think back to walk to and from school in the late 50s and most of the 60s. The big difference was you would be with a whole crowd of children, the problem now is so many children are driven to and from school (I live close to a primary school and the parking issues are terrible) and therefore children walking tend to be more isolated.

I think you have to consider the child, the route e.g. roads with no pavements would make me say no, and how much pedestrian traffic there is.

Surely on the 3 nights with after school activities she could be picked up if it is dark with her walking the other two with a plan that as the nights get lighter she can do the 5.