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AIBU
My dad spent 40 years mastering his craft, and last week someone half his age told him how to eat.đ
(91 Posts)My dad was a professional chef for forty years.
Not a hobby cook. Not someone who followed recipes on weekends. A professional. Someone who fed hundreds of people, who could taste a sauce and know in thirty seconds exactly what it needed, who understood food the way most people understand their own name.
Last week someone told him he should be eating more carefully at his age. Since when does being old prevent certain privilege
I looked at my dad and watched his face. That specific stillness that happens when someone who has spent a lifetime building something real is told that perhaps they need a little guidance now.
He just smiled. Said thank you. And said nothing else.
And I wanted to say everything he didn't. Because what I've known about my dad. He was getting up before anyone else was awake and doing things properly when the person giving him advice was still in school. He has forgotten more about feeding people well than most people giving him guidance have had the chance to learn yet.
He is not confused. He is not struggling. I've never seen him as a problem that needs solving by someone younger with better information.
He is someone who earned the right to be asked â not advised. My siblings think am being dramatic.
I don't think the people who do this mean any harm. I genuinely don't.
But I wonder sometimes if you feel it. If you recognise that specific smile. The one that absorbs something rather than causes a scene. The one that has been practised so long it looks like patience but is actually something else entirely. I wonder what you figured out through sixty years of doing it for real â that no amount of well meaning advice from anyone younger could have taught you and how you handle similar situations
Being a chef is a talent. For sure. But that talent is creating the best, tasty dishes. It doesnât automatically mean you are a nutritionist.
NoraHayes
To Marg75
I'm not sure the way he dealt with it is best though. I understand why he did it. But I sometimes wonder if the quiet dignity of saying nothing is exactly what makes people think it's acceptable to keep doing it.
Exactly - bloody cheek saying that to your Dad - I would feel as you do x
ViceVersa
Why do these posts always read like AI wrote them?
I was thinking the OP sounded very eloquent and that the post was very calm and well thought out.
mrsfeather
Yes it's AI. I hate this!
How do you know?
Exactly. Even if it serves as âgetting it off your chestâ! Look on it as feed back for the gobshite for them to learn, grow and develop.
Proverb
Tell me what you claim and I'll tell you what you lack.
People who go round telling you what they are good at are also trying to convince themselves. People who really do know what they are doing don't need to boast about it.
In your father's position I would simply not have been bothered to embarrass the person by telling them my background. IMHO I don't think the incident will have bothered him.
This is the first GN post that I have noticed that appears to be AI generated. I comment out of interest rather than in criticism. At the moment AI has very characteristic mannerisms in use of language, grammar etc and once one is familiar with these features, can irritate. The use of AI does not mean that the situation described is not real or doesnât deserve comment. However, it does have a dampening, deadening effect.
No advice but I do feel your pain
ViceVersa
Why do these posts always read like AI wrote them?
I suspect it is because AI wrote it. UTube has several real people talking about the rule of three, itâs not this itâs that etc.
Mountains and molehills spring to mind
Silvertwigs
Exactly. Even if it serves as âgetting it off your chestâ! Look on it as feed back for the gobshite for them to learn, grow and develop.
I don't understand this?
Who do you mean please?
What are you referring to?
Where is the OP?
If she is so intent on sticking up for her dad why isn't she on here defending herself against to assumptions that she uses AI?
What's wrong with using AI?
I feel her post was on the wrong thread. It should be on Everyday Ageism
Grammaretto
Where is the OP?
If she is so intent on sticking up for her dad why isn't she on here defending herself against to assumptions that she uses AI?
What's wrong with using AI?
I feel her post was on the wrong thread. It should be on ^Everyday Ageism^
When posts appear to have been written by AI, I always suspect that there may be an ulterior motive, and the responses are being used elsewhere.
Yes, Grammaretto - Everyday Ageism is a good place.
It certainly applied to my mother-in-law's interaction with various people until they knew her.
Samsaral, what came to mind immediately is the saying Pot, Kettle, Black, which I believe most people will understand.
This OP certainly sounds like AI to me, and I donât like that.
If you see a (usually long) piece of text such as the OP that includes an 'm dash' i.e. a loong dash rather than an 'n dash' ie a shorter dash that is used in most normal writing, it is a BIG give-away for probably being written by AI.
Thatâs what I thoughtâŠ.
But why did this man say or feel the need to tell a random stranger what to eat? Makes no difference if uour dad was a chef or othetwise that was just rudeness and bad manners! None of his business and your dad handled that with dignity. đđđđ
Cossy
Doodledog
My guess is that it's almost certainly AI, but that doesn't necessarily mean we are being taken for fools. Before there is a pile on, it's worth considering that there is a chance that the OP wanted to write a post on the subject but wasn't confident enough to do it herself, so ran hers through AI to help her.
As I've said, I don't respond to her posts, as they do seem to follow the AI pattern:
Balanced phrases - not A, not B, but C.
The 'rule of three' - He did A, then B, then (punchline) C.
Questions phrased as information that leads the reader towards the 'correct' response- did you ever do A, which made you feel B, and it resulted in C? I wonder if you felt D?
There's more, but it is that sort of thing that flags AI writing. People do use it to 'cheat', but also to help with Dyslexia and to correct poor grammar etc. Given the readiness with which posts are often picked apart on here when someone posts in less than perfect English, I could understand someone using AI to help, and in my work experience those who really want to cheat will edit AI-speak to eradicate such obvious tells, but this post seems hot off the press. I wouldn't want the OP to feel she can't post again if the above is the case, and she will probably reinvent herself if it's all been a scam.AI is used now on every day life, by many people.
Itâs often used to âamendâ âcorrectâ and âjazz upâ statements, reports, even job applications, all quite legally.
Just because many of us donât use AI on a regular basis, doesnât mean others donât.
There are many versions of apps etc online which allow us to freely use AI in very language format, we would choose a UK English version.
Which is what I meant by 'it's worth considering that there is a chance that the OP wanted to write a post on the subject but wasn't confident enough to do it herself, so ran hers through AI to help her.'
I'm not sure if you are disagreeing with me or saying the same thing, in which case I'm not sure why you quoted međ
It is a generic issue, don't you find ? Patronising advice especially from the doctors. Breast lumps were followed with advice about types of bra to change to "at my age".
40 years as a programmer through to IT consultant, I asked a simple question - I gave the spec of my rather elderly laptop compared to the advertised min spec, highlighting some of the differences and if they thought it was going to manage Windows 11 as it would seem on the border of ability. I was then advised what the min spec was, and advised about software backup process. , All of which I knew.
My phone sometimes makes long hyphens and sometimes short.
On my laptop that doesn't happen.
Maybe someone coild please PM me as to why???
Oldfossil I couldn't have put it as well as you did but fully agree AI is easy to spot.
Itâs the flowery sentences that give it away
That specific stillness that happens when someone who has spent a lifetime building something realâŠ.
But I wonder sometimes if you feel it. If you recognise that specific smile. The one that absorbs something rather than causes a scene.
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