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Would you mention it or not?

(96 Posts)
Zengran Tue 01-Nov-16 15:04:33

We live on an over 55s complex and have relatively new neighbours (3 months). The thing is, their bedroom is next to our lounge and I can hear everything when they are having sex. They go to bed much earlier than us. We live in a very small bungalow and there is no other room where I can't hear it.I find it embarrassing that I am privy to such personal sounds but don't know what to do about it. Turning the telly up doesn't really mask it!!

Anya Tue 01-Nov-16 15:09:50

How often and how long does it last?

I'm only wondering because if it's just on the odd occasion and not prolonged you might just want to invest in a pair of headphones and leave them to it.

Jalima Tue 01-Nov-16 15:13:25

You could try turning up your music very very loud

The walls must be quite thin, making me think twice about moving to a retirement complex hmm

M0nica Tue 01-Nov-16 15:40:57

Presumably your complex has a manager, resident or visiting. Why not discuss this problem with them and leave them to deal with it for you?

Granarchist Tue 01-Nov-16 15:46:22

go with MOnica I say!!! Otherwise you might have to say something to them like - do you hear much noise from my flat? - or gosh aren't these walls thin? - can you maybe add more sound insulation?

Christinefrance Tue 01-Nov-16 15:55:32

Go for the headphones or make it a competition! !

Grannyknot Tue 01-Nov-16 16:02:48

Reach for the ear plugs and a good book, it should all be over in a few minutes...

Zengran Tue 01-Nov-16 16:09:10

Anya Usually Wednesday and Sunday! Sometimes Saturday afternoon.
M0nica No, no manager. We just get someone every 4 months to check the alarm system.
We don't own the property so can't make changes like adding sound insulation.
I sound like a right misery don't I!! But it makes me think twice about our own love life!!

BBbevan Tue 01-Nov-16 16:18:01

Clap loudly when they finish. That should get the message across ( only joking) I would agree with MOnica

Brummiegran Tue 01-Nov-16 16:25:53

No real suggestions but your situation reminds me of the landlord's son in our first rented flat. He brought a young bride from Cyprus, after a short visit home, and they indulged in rapturous sex thrice nightly in the room above us! We were only newly together ourselves but the effect was demoralising in the extreme. I couldn't look either of them in the eye.grin

Jalima Tue 01-Nov-16 16:31:42

It should be interesting chatting over the garden fence, can you look them in the eye?

What is so special about Wednesday and Sunday? Nothing on telly? Or is it Poldark that gives them inspiration?

Elegran Tue 01-Nov-16 16:36:29

Do what we did. We were spending a short break in a quite large hotel in the Highlands, and were in a room in a very quiet and under-occupied part of it. The room next door was supposedly empty, but I assume that staff members congregated there in the off hours to socialise.

The door was very busy with people arriving far into the night, lots of chatter, and lots of thumping the bedhead against the wall - our bedhead was just a wall-thickness away so we got no sleep until 3 or 4 in the morning. Then it started again at 6 am. So we retaliated in kind. There was a muffled exclamation, and silence and stillness from then on.

You could try that. Be sure to be noisily vocal in your appreciation of the experience. Then when you next meet them, mention how thin the walls are.

Atqui Tue 01-Nov-16 16:37:37

Guess you too will have to go to bed early on Wed and Sunday!! I'm feeling very inadequate!!blush

Elegran Tue 01-Nov-16 16:38:42

No, don't go to bed early, wait until early next morning, when they are trying to catch up on their sleep.

Elegran Tue 01-Nov-16 16:39:14

Sing loud hymns?

Jalima Tue 01-Nov-16 16:40:02

You could put on some music that you know they dislike at top volume, then go off down to the pub.

Luckygirl Tue 01-Nov-16 16:43:54

I like the idea of clapping! - or bang in the wall!

Rinouchka Tue 01-Nov-16 16:49:22

I love Elegran's suggestion. Sounds like fun.... If you can't beat them, join them!

Atqui Tue 01-Nov-16 16:52:12

Good idea Elegran but they'll have to get up and go into the sitting room !

ninathenana Tue 01-Nov-16 16:55:33

When the bedhead starts banging. Start saying loudly things like "Oh no, up a bit" "Yes, that's good" "Slower darling" thlgrin
Seriously I would just say "I hope our TV/music/radio didn't disturb you last night as these walls are notoriously thin" said with a knowing smile.

Zengran Tue 01-Nov-16 17:00:37

Thank you all, you have made me smile. It is very hard to look her in the eye when i see her!!blush

Galen Tue 01-Nov-16 17:19:31

When I was doing my house jobs preregistration, the bedroom above the lounge in the doctor's mess was occupied by the obs and gynae SHO Many lunchtimes she was joined by the obs and gynae registrar in the very squeaky bed.
The faces of the senior consultants had to be seen to be believed! We juniors had difficulty containing our giggles.
We used a system of coloured lights as a call system ( before modern bleeps)
The call sign for the registrar was a a steady orange! He was known as forever amber!
And no, they were not married. He was married to someone else!
I think that came from tv series that was current at the time

Galen Tue 01-Nov-16 17:20:53

Bolero by Ravel might be a good choice of music!

Jalima Tue 01-Nov-16 17:24:48

My friend made me giggle when she told me this was playing loudly in the room next to theirs when they were on their honeymoon:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=9fWeBZTfrQI

rosesarered Tue 01-Nov-16 17:30:15

Wow! Respect, 3/4 times a week! grin
Seriously though, I would do what others advise and say innocently, ' hope our noise doesn't bother you, the walls here are so very thin!'