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New dog

(86 Posts)
Newnannie Sun 28-Jan-18 10:59:50

Hi all, this is a first time post so please be gentle! First off I’m not a dog owner, I have 3 cats. My daughter is expecting her first baby at the end of April, she already had a 3 year old Alaskan malamute who is gorgeous and she loves him a lot. Thing is she now wants to adopt another malamute ( big dogs, 48 kilo) to keep him company. The dog she is looking to adopt belongs at the moment to a friend of hers who's wife is expecting their second baby and they don’t have the time for their second dog which is the one my daughter wants to adopt. I feel that it’s the wrong time to adopt a new dog however well the two dogs get on. I think I’ll be looking after baby at least one day a week in the future and don’t think I could cope with baby and 2 big dogs but that’s not the point, I’m worried that she won’t be able to either and poor dog will be looking for a new home again!! This is a first baby, first grandchild and her husband doesn’t want a second dog either. I have a very close relationship with my daughter, but I’m just so worried!! Any thoughts anyone?

Newnannie Sun 28-Jan-18 11:01:50

New post

hildajenniJ Sun 28-Jan-18 11:54:04

I don't think could have coped with one dog, let alone two, when I was a new mum to my first child. My housework went to pot, I didn't change our bed sheets for eight weeks!😨 I think you DD is seriously underestimating the amount of work, and the tiredness involved with having a new baby. I would try to dissuade her from getting another huge dog until she has had the baby and knows she can manage all the extra work.
As a family, we got our first dog when DD was three and DS was eighteen months old.

NanaandGrampy Sun 28-Jan-18 12:15:27

No !

Just no! Alaskan Malamutes are magnificent creatures but there are issues ( some of which can be dealt with if you get your dog from a pup ). First of all they are world class lead pullers ! If well-trained less likely but if your daughter is taking on someone else's dog ( that they didn't have time for so how much training has been done?) then there is that to consider.

There you are with a buggy and 2 dogs all pulling hell for leather? I consider myself an experienced dog handler and I wouldn't take them out together. Maybe 20 years ago but they are not dogs for beginners .

Fences tend not to confine them - they are escape artists extraordinaire ! They will eat until they burst and are great scavengers ( always a concern when with small children I feel UNLESS very well trained and even then not dogs I would leave alone with a child).

I'm sorry to be so negative but this is just not the best time to add another large dog to a changing household. Does your daughter have any idea how many dogs are rehomed when a new baby arrives? Its a large percentage. People underestimate the work to balance the needs of a dog and a new baby.

I hope you can persuade her to wait - rethink it once baby is here- everything might look different then.

midgey Sun 28-Jan-18 12:16:35

Asking for trouble all round, original dog will have two new things to work out, new dog will be trying to find it’s feet and mum will be exhausted. Dissuade her!

M0nica Sun 28-Jan-18 12:18:32

I would never, ever, ever have one huge dog in the house with a young child in it, let alone two of them with a baby and toddler.

You can all imagine for yourselves the possible results and will have read about about such events in the papers far too frequently.

glammanana Sun 28-Jan-18 12:38:26

A big NO NO my son has an 8 yr old malamute he was already owned by my DIL when they married and my son is a strong man even he has to be on his guard all the time with him with other dogs,he and his wife do not have children as yet but he has always said if they do have any he would seriously have to think about rehoming him as he would be jealous of any baby brought into the family. Your DD will have to think seriously about settling the 2nd dog into the household whilst preparing to have her baby which is something I would not be happy with,speak to your SIL and get him to make his views clear on the subject.

Bellasnana Sun 28-Jan-18 12:55:07

Sounds like a recipe for disaster. Hope you can persuade her to see sense.

merlotgran Sun 28-Jan-18 13:34:57

I agree with all the above. We had a well trained Labrador when I had my first baby. She put up with being shoved to the bottom of the attention list but get another large dog??


dogsmother Sun 28-Jan-18 13:38:42

Oh dear, couldn't agree more with the others its a big fat NO!
But how do you get her to listen....
I would suggest you get her to talk to other dog owners about the reality of it and hopefully they will make her see sense.

whitewave Sun 28-Jan-18 13:47:57

We had dogs most of married life, and the dogs definately get pushed to the bottom when the babies start arriving. Looking back I realise we asked too much of the dogs, and I would not do it again, and I didn’t work.

Those husky type breeds need more exercise than almost every other breed, they will easily cover 100 miles pulling a sledge so I can’t see how anyone could possibly give the dog their needs

harrigran Sun 28-Jan-18 18:45:22

I would not have a dog in tne house where there was a new baby or any child for that matter.

MissAdventure Sun 28-Jan-18 18:50:31

Oh no!! Surely that type of dog should have the attention it needs to keep it safe and able to be trusted. Its an accident (or worse) waiting to happen!

BlueBelle Sun 28-Jan-18 19:04:16

A big fat No from me too for so many reasons I wouldn’t have one dog round a new baby let alone two and one that is new to the house and it’s inhabitants it’s a receipe for disaster and I would worry about the baby I would Also feel for the dogs what if they hate each other or are jealous or too playful they are big strong ole dogs that need a lot of attention
I would normally say don’t get involved but I think as the husband is sensible enough to not want a second one too you all need to point out the possible downfalls and open her eyes a bit

Lisalou Sun 28-Jan-18 19:07:19

No, I dont think it is a good idea. I have had animals (dogs and cats) all my life, and also when my children were tiny, Having said that, I would not have brought a new animal into the house when I was expecting. The dogs (and cats) were well trained and made to understand that they babies were my priority from the start. It worked well, and I had no problems with them, but I was experienced with my animals, and never left any of them unsupervised with the children.
On the other hand, we are speaking a working breed. these animals need a lot of exercise and are not the best sort of family dog. They are lovely animals, but need a lot of work.

Christinefrance Sun 28-Jan-18 19:16:31

I have three dogs but would be very wary of this situation. The original dog will be coming to terms with the new baby and to introduce another dog as well is a recipe for disaster.
They are beautiful dogs but very strong and need a lot of exercise, your daughter will not have the time to give them what they need.

grannyactivist Sun 28-Jan-18 20:15:13

When my daughter was newly widowed just after having her first baby her decision making skills went out the window - and she put a hefty deposit on a puppy. When she very excitedly told me about the anticipated new addition I went ballistic encouraged her to think again and spelled out all the reasons why I thought it would be a bad idea. The following day she called up the pup's owner and withdrew her offer. She lost her deposit, but came to realise that she had also saved herself a lot of problems.

I think your daughter may have vastly underestimated how big a change a first baby creates, it may be helpful to simply suggest she delays making a decision until the baby is three months old - and if the dog's owners can't wait then they must make other arrangements. When we were visiting dog rescue centres last year we could have had our pick of half a dozen Mamalutes so she could easily get another if she really wants one. I suspect she just wants to do her friend a favour without having really thought through the difficulties.

Newnannie Sun 28-Jan-18 20:18:36

Thank you ladies, you have without exception confirmed my feelings!! My daughter has had her Mally since he was a pup and he is exceptionally placid. I’m not quite so worried about him. I can walk him, and with his harness the pulling is controllable. I’m going to have to bite the bullet and have a chat both with my SIL and my DD. She is an extremely responsible and knowledgeable dog owner so I hope she will see sense!! Any further thoughts however will be gratefully received.

Newnannie Sun 28-Jan-18 20:21:24

Grannyactivist you are so right!!

Bathsheba Sun 28-Jan-18 22:35:15

I've been following this thread, but haven't contributed so far because I felt that it had all been said. I agree with everyone that your daughter is inviting disaster by adopting this second dog.
Newnannie when you 'bite the bullet' with your DD and SiL, why not show them this thread? Let them see that you are not just being over protective, but that there is a very strong consensus that they would be taking a huge risk.
Good luck.

Tegan2 Sun 28-Jan-18 22:58:09

You'd have to ask the question which is,' if the malamute was with a malamute rescue organisation, would they allow your daughter to have the dog' and I don't think they would. I'd also worry that two malamutes would result in both dogs developing some kind of pack instinct; and I'm sure that if they're used for sledging there always has to be a pack leader. Having said that, they are beautiful dogs and I can understand your daughter being so fond of them.

Fizzy11 Sun 28-Jan-18 23:35:42

Hi Newnannie, another newbie here. My D got a puppy in March of last year against everything her dad & I said but not our problem, then in April she found out she was pregnant. Baby 5 weeks old & already she’s regretting the dog & we end up walking it. Certainly 2 dogs would be incredibly difficult as I’ve no idea how you push a pram & hold onto two dogs. Holding one is hard enough.

Maidmarion Mon 29-Jan-18 09:38:19

And it's another big fat NOOOOOO from me!!! Please show your daughter these posts!!!!!! I am speaking from experience... Again, NOOO!!

jenpax Mon 29-Jan-18 09:41:58

Like everyone else I would say no! A friend got a puppy when pregnant and regretted it as soon as the baby arrived! I think it’s the mother instinct cutting in during pregnancy wanting to get something else in to nurture. But of course once the baby arrives she will find all her time and energy taken up with her or him.
Also these are huge dogs! My youngest DD and partner bought a black lab a few years ago and although she already had one DS he was 6.they now have a 8 month old and my DD complains about the extra work the dog brings! And he’s not a husky😳

SussexGirl60 Mon 29-Jan-18 09:42:07

Hi Newnannie,
What a worry for you. Would it be easier if you broached the subject by asking her exactly why she wants another dog now...are there signs that her present dog actually does need another dog for company? Could she wait until the baby is born before committing, especially as her husband doesn’t want it(she may be too busy with the baby to want it then)? Or, could you confide in her husband and comment that you won’t feel happy babaysitting with two large dogs there...and could he talk with her? I think the subject needs discussing, but sensitively! Good luck!