Ideas on how to become motivated!

Prior to going semi retired I went on a course designed to prepare people for this longed-for state for some people, and it being something other people dreaded. There was a good suggestion to treat the first few weeks or so like a holiday, get up late, catch up with friends etc. Then some people might find they had a void in their life which they might need to fill with activities, voluntary organisations paid part-time work. I was really looking forward to having time to myself, and if it's any help for suggestion, I took up projects I'd always wanted to do, and also to progress stuff I wanted to pursue further. (Aside from dreadful work bullying interference I've posted about in another thread...). So my projects are: I'm a lace maker, and am teaching myself a different type of lace (Honiton lace, a tad fiddly but rewarding when it goes right!), I ride a motorcycle, so am taking tuition to do my advanced test, wanted to get fitter so go swimming every week. The swimming I aim for at roughly the same time, though not slavish to an exact time. The lacemaking tends to be when I have the house to myself (to spare other people's ears from the bad language if it's not going well...), the motorcycle tuition is led by my tutor's availability and timetable. So I have a mix of please-myself activities, and those which I 'hang the week/day on'.

I still let myself get up late on non-working days and slob about in my dressing gown as the fancy takes me! Sometimes I do housework before I get dressed, sometimes after, and sometimes I don't do housework at all. Actually come to think of it, the house is far messier and lacking in pristineness since I've had more time - oops!

Don't know if this helps with you reaching some sort of framework?

As I said in a post earlier this week I am so envious when I read about people who have retired. The green eyed monster in me is screeching of how I would love to be lazing in my PJs of a morning (I work 7 days a week)
I am 62 this year and I have another 4 years until I get my pension.
If I was in you situation I would laze around as much as I wanted and not feel guilty about it, just enjoy.

This all sounds very familiar to me, I've always been a great reader so no problem lying around, then - well here I am mid morning Saturday on GN! Its been a bad winter who wants to get up if they don't have to. I am sure soon you will begin to piece together a week that suits you, there is plenty to join and do if you are able, enjoy.

Do not expect nor even try to suddenly adjust to retirement. You need at least 6 months and more like a year before you are 'ready' for that adjustment. By ready I mean able to make decisions about how your life should proceed. That is what you want to do and how to do it.

Making decisions now may lead to you making the wrong ones. Retiring is such a big life change, one for which you have not had any previous experience. Some things will change while others, especially people, will not. After a year I believe you will be thinking very differently about your future than today.

Relax; enjoy your sudden freedom; do not worry about today.

nannychris1. Worry not. It will all fall into place in your own good time. I'm actually typing this from the amazing warmth and comfort of my bed. When I first retired, I was quite the opposite, always needing to be on the go and with a project. This has changed greatly and now my main 'project' is ladies who lunch. Took time though. I smile and hug myself that I have been lucky with health and life is seriously kind. I'm slowly but surely renovating my entire house but slowly has been operative. Just try to enjoy and don't criticise yourself. I may sound lazy but truth is I'll be up with the larks pretty soon. Absolutely longing for Spring and itching to get out in the garden. We get the beloved extra hour of daylight starting tomorrow so that's my first bonus. Bring it on! I would simply say to you.....relax and enjoy. Good luck.

I retired 2.5 years ago and said I would do nothing for the first year. So I did exactly that. Not only for my first year but the second one too. I started new hobbies and continued old ones full time.

However I am now getting bored. Now this might seem extreme but I have put my house on the market and am looking forward to starting a new garden, decorating my new home and making new friends. I might look for a part-time job or do some volunteer work when I'm settled.

The point I am trying to make is that you will know when you need outside stimulation. Retirement is such a huge change. Enjoy slowing down, doing what you want to do when you want to do it, for as long as you enjoy it. ?

Get out of bed, open the window wide, chuck out all that guilt along with a few expressions 'have to', 'must' and even 'should'.
Go back to bed, snuggle down and smile. Get up again when you're good and ready and do what ever you WANT to do. Walk, dance, garden, volunteer, chat to friends, lunch, what ever makes you happy, you earned it.

After a very busy career combined with bringing up 4 children it felt a bit odd to have leisure time! It took me about a year to fully adjust so give it time and just do things which you enjoy.

So pleased to find out I’m not the only one who sits around in pj’s all morning ( I really must go and have a shower in a minute ). If I need to be out early I am, otherwise I do what I want, when I want.

Structuring time and making new friends are all skills to be learned in retirement. School and work has for a lot of us provided these elements of our lives.

I suggest you make a list of your interests, and a list of regular appointments ie. hairdresser, 6 monthly dentist, etc and regular tasks i.e shopping for food. I have a paper diary to put these things in. Then go on the internet and decide how to follow up your interests. Mine are through the University of the Third Age U3A, Adult Learning, local clubs and initially on retiring volunteering. Very soon you will have a busy diary made up of events you have chosen. I am also in touch with the alumnae group of my university etc. and on the subscription list for email notice of the programmes at my local play house etc.

Then I make sure that anything I might hatstand is in an electronic folder for the year ie. diary 2018, When I decide to attend I print it out and put it in a plastic wallet which goes into a thin A$ file next to the telephone. Before I set off I take the hard copy with me.

any way good luck. Its quite a job once you have a bust retirement life keeping up with the new contacts. When I get a new email address I put the year I met the person and the place i.e. 2018 U3A Jean Doe. This helps me to locate the person again when I am unable to recall their name. Also it prevents me, when there are two people with the same name, sending the wrong one the information.

We look forward to retirement but not everyone fulfils the plans they had in their head when that day dawns.
I cannot advise, because many people follow their own path in life regardless of advice if it doesn't chime with what they're comfortable with. Ideas ebb and flow.
My own ecperience was to take several months to just do nothing, random stuff, a taste of this and that on days when the mood took me.
I was glad to get out of the 9-5, food shopping on Saturday regime and can wander back to bed with a book at whatever o'clock whenever I want.
I joined a MeetUp photography group after about a year of idle pleasures and pick and choose which locations interest me.
I enjoy solitary day trips to the various coastal resorts nearest me.
I belong to the WI which has many young mums who keep it lively and fresh.
Visiting my children and GC (who live a good distance from me) is something I can do at times to fit their busy lives too.
Today, besides putting a packet of rustic bread mix into the breadmaker when making my morning coffee, I hsve done nothing, save check on my patio plants, read the news, written up a bit in my daily journal, and read the threads on here.
I do what I feel like doing, given time, weather and mood.
Rest assured, you'll find the right path into your new future.
Good luck.

*experience

Soniah

Phew!!
I feel quite exhausted after reading about all your activities. Whew!

Emily Harburn

Goodness me!
You make it sound horribly regimented.
Retirement...isn't that supposed to be less organised than the jobs we were glad to leave?
A4 files, plastic folders and spreadsheets...haha.
( shakes head)

I also felt the same when I first retired. It took years to realise I didn’t have to be busy doing something ‘important’. I also jumped into volunteering in the area I had worked in, but quickly realised that was the wrong thing to do. Caring for my lovely GS filled my time for a few years but now he is at school. I have been able to enjoy doing nothing or reading, watching TV, listening to music. I do struggle with timetabled activities, such as volunteering or classes, as I don’t want to be tied down. But, that is to be my next step to take as we move to a new area.

Give yourself a break! Gradually your life will start to fill up with Things To Do and might find yourself missing those glorious days in your PJs.

In a 5 day 'working week, I have a couple of days where I have to get up, and a couple where I can please myself. Have gained a dog, picked up a couple of new crafts in the last 2 years, joined a couple of short-term classes and one long-term one.

This probably sounds eccentric, but I spend an hour in the mornings doing really vigorous aerobic exercise. I used to enjoy going to the gym, but stopped for a couple of years while I got over a knee replacement. YouTube has great personal trainers leading lots of good workouts which can be done, for free, with practically no equipment. I don’t have a smart TV, but cast the videos from my tablet to my regular TV via my Now box. I especially like Walk at Home, but I can also do a full-sweat aerobic workout while seated on a chair. No genteel Yoga and Pilates for me - I love to move, and it really boosts the feelgood factors in my brain.

Well, there's U3A - a friend of mine has joined 11 of their groups - architecture, Chinese writing, painting, local history etc. (She hasn't got gc though). There's all sorts of voluntary work. I used to go into one of the local Care Homes and chat to the residents over morning coffee; now I go into the gcs School and help children with their reading. Really though, you shouldn't feel bad about unproductive use of time. You've worked and earnt time off, and with the pension coming in, no real reason to do anything. I still feel like that sometimes though, looking n the jobcentre and applying for jobs...it can be a bit embarrassing when you get offered a job though, and find you don't want it!

I loved my job and handed in my retirement letter on the last possible date for a 31 Dec final day (actually left before that because some holiday leave was outstanding) but I was happily looking forward to retirement and a 'new' life. It took a while to adjust, I wasted time. I had planned a project to start after retirement - it took me two years to start it. Four years after retirement I'm run off my feet. Seeing friends, U3A, doing some voluntary work. There are not enough days in the week.

In many ways I share your predicament. I find it difficult to get going of a morning but as long as I'm up and dressed by 10.30 at the latest I try not to beat myself up about it. I tell myself to feel shame at this but when I recall that in my last job I had to get up at 3.15 I feel I deserve to be kinder to myself.

Wildswan16, you are a lady after my own heart!!

Several of my friends have joined u3a and are desperately busy rushing from meeting to meeting. I tried it but actually like being lazy. I swim several times a week and meet a friend for coffee twice. Also have g son 2 days and enjoy social media and reading.

I was brought up with the "Protestant Work Ethic" - so when I retired I felt guilty that money was being paid into my bank and I hadn't worked for it - until a friend said "you've worked all your life for it." But it still feels a bit naughty - something for nothing.
Since the first day of my retirement I love being retired - love the freedom of choice - but it took me a few years to come to terms with not "having" to do things - it's a real lifestyle adjustment - physical, mental & emotional - expert advice generally focuses only on the financial adjustment.
I think I've finally settled into it - activities, interests, friends & family - no set pattern - I don't like the idea of doing certain things on certain days - I had enough of a disciplined schedule in the workplace - so I enjoy flexibility & spontaneity - but I still can't watch TV in the daytime - far too wicked ? "The devil makes work for idle fingers" ? as my Gran would say ?

I like the old Spanish proverb .... ‘it’s lovely to do nothing & then rest for a while’. And why not.