Is this acceptable in the 21st century

I met my present partner 13 years ago when we were both in our 50s and we have always had a remote handover point at 9pm. I have whatever I fancy on up to 9 and he has what he wants on after that, It works because I'm practically brain dead by 9 anyway and if I want to watch something broadcast after that time I watch it on catch up. Over the years he has got quite into the soaps etc although he wouldn't admit it, his worse habit is suddenly asking me at a crucial point who a character is and by the time I've explained this person was swapped at birth or whatever I've missed the action.

I'm still very proud of the fact that he really got into Project Runway when his idea of high fashion is a quick visit to Matalan!

My husband is quite 'controlling' with the tv - actually if I'm honest I'm embarrassed about it. It's one thing not liking what the other person watches but don't go on about it so much that's it spoils it for the other person. We do have two TVs so I sometimes watch Corrie etc. On my own as it's more peaceful and I can enjoy it more! I don't behave in the same way as I think it's poor show. You probably think more fool me but anything for a peaceful life.

Goodness! Just let my husband try to control anything I do! But perhaps some women like having all the decisions made for them. Maybe they find it easier that way. There are times when I feel that some wives are quite proud of their husband's controlling ways - I think it might seem like protective love to them, although it just looks like bullying to me!

get another tv., or tell him to get knotted.

Ha, I did tell him to "get knotted" but he wouldn't go - I didn't have anywhere else to go to as I wanted to stay near my children, and I couldn't afford to live on my own. Sad but that's the way it is for a lot of women. Yes, it is a form of bullying but sometimes you don't realise until later what is happening. Not asking for sympathy - just trying to explain.

I can well believe it, OP. Though how any woman puts up with this sort of thing in this day and age, defeats me.

I'm reminded of a woman in the library where I used to work - she came to the counter with several audio books, and the friend with her asked why all audio, and not 'proper' books.
She put on a confidential, apologetic face. 'He doesn't like me reading.'
How I kept my mouth shut I will never know! I have often though of it since, and pictured a grumpy, miserable old Victor Meldrew type - or rather worse - saying, 'Got your nose in a book again? Why aren't you doing something useful?' (Like cooking, cleaning, ironing....)

Having said that, I've known one or two women who seemed to derive some perverse sort of pleasure out of making complete doormats/martyrs of themselves.
Only a couple, though!

Some of you may remember my posts a little while ago about my OH, and after a few good bits of advice the worm turned! One of the things I did was to get a second remote for the TV hide it and when he came in and changed the channel I turned it back again! This went on for a ew days before he twigged that the problem wasnt with the TV or his remote but his ignoring me and my wishes!! His face was a picture when I told him this was just the beginning and life was going to be different! To give him his due he did apologise as he had not realised he was doing it and it lead to a "frank and honest" discussion of our life. Things have changed!

Well done Hazbeen
and well done Mr Hazbeen for apologising and changing his ways.

Good one Hazbeen! And a good outcome too. Congratulations!

Gosh, Witzend. Does that mean the woman could only listening to her audio books while doing household tasks? I have heard of situations where people who struggle with reading or have struggled with studying don't like to see others reading or studying. There used to be an advertisement for the NSPCC where an adult was ripping up a child's homework. It sounds akin to that.