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no-chat partner

(87 Posts)
annep Sat 26-May-18 09:27:44

Anyone else feel lonely at home because their partner doesn't chat? I have friends but sometimes it's like living in a silent retreat. And then suddenly for a short time he talks nonstop and I can't cope with the sudden change. Sorry to moan.

MawBroon Tue 29-May-18 23:21:12

I didn’t mean to imply you were belittling anything but feel am perhaps sensitive even slightly defensive on behalf of those like me who are (recently) widowed and who do not say how “ lucky” others are.
Apologies if I misunderstood you but it sounded like that in your post of 20.34 I am never comfortable with those who are alone who start saying how lucky you are ....etc )

Menopaws Tue 29-May-18 23:23:37

I can assure those of you who perhaps think I do not appreciate what I have that I most certainly do. My gripe is a daily niggle combined with a sadness to see someone I love so dearly slowly changing and speaking of it is my release valve. He still makes my heart jump when I see him, I'm amazed and grateful he has been mine and only mine for 40 years and believe me he turned many heads in his day, I see him in all my lovely children and I get to spend every day with him day and night. I'm one lucky lady I know but I wouldn't be human if I didn't moan a bit and with girlfriends and people like yourselves I can keep myself sane and give him the best of me so making out time together as good as possible, for which gnetters I am very grateful. As annep said it's good to share and after earlier kitchen tap issue (other thread) it was good to laugh and had lovely meal out with girlfriend who moaned about her lot but did we laugh so all good.

M0nica Wed 30-May-18 07:47:46

mawbroon I do understand how you must feel at present, but, as you say, you were not among those saying how lucky you are.

But every way of life has ups and downs and there is an element of emotional blackmail by someone who effectively tries to close a discussion down, any discussion, by using the 'how lucky' argument. As I said, every way of life has pros and cons. because one family has to cope with a child with profound disabilities is no reason to dismiss the problems of families who do not have this problem but face other problems.

Luckygirl Wed 30-May-18 08:27:32

It is a problem here, as every question/statement takes an eternity to emerge from my OH, who is unwell. Sometimes I take a breath in to speak and think better of it, as at that moment I do not feel patient enough to make the long wait.

I know he cannot help it, but this is repeated endless times every day and I am only human! And sadly, when the statement does emerge, 9 times out of 10 it is something anxious and negative - and really, believe me,there is only just so much of that that you can take and stay sane.

A sad situation.

Chinesecrested Wed 30-May-18 09:37:41

I like it that my partner doesn't talk too much. His only annoying habit is when he gets the bit between his teeth and gives me a running commeñtary on his day at work! Usually I'm watching something or reading something and I lose the thread!

bjhsum Wed 30-May-18 10:38:58

I work from home mostly and although my home is beautiful both inside and out and it's filled with gadgets and comfort I feel like the loneliest person ever. The strange thing is I am so worldly in topic and life experience and conversation too. I describe myself as truly platonic individual who has an enormous amount of wit and yet professionalism. Other peeps have describ as a true gentleman with a wicked flirty nature with a hint of fetishism for flavour. And yet IT's rarely these days that i get to engage in conversation with other like-minds unless it a serious discussion about something or other legal. I'd love to just be able to draw on a friend even if it is just a penfriend and have normal everyday discussion.

Menopaws Wed 30-May-18 22:43:29

Luckyflowers

MawBroon Wed 30-May-18 23:08:43

I’m not sure the “touch of fetishism” would ncessarily be conducive to conversation.
Sorry you are lonely, but what are you doing about it?

Jalima1108 Wed 30-May-18 23:33:55

I'm sure there must be other like-minded peeps out there on the internet who have the same interests as you bjhsum.
I'm not sure there would be much uptake on GN for flirting and fetishism but other sites may be available.

Lili2 Sat 02-Jun-18 10:44:16

How do you deal with someone who does not talk and whose life is centred around either playing tennis or watching it on tv from around the world. We have only been together for 2 years and unfortunately I am lonely. I have told him but nothing changes.....I have my own interests, run 3 groups for u3a but I really to communicate.....At the moment I want us to separate.....

mcem Sat 02-Jun-18 12:10:21

bjh your post reads a little like a profile for an internet dating site - not really like an initial post on GN!
As maw asked, what are you doing about it?
There may be more appropriate sites for you.