Frequency of visits

Never. Don't even know how many I've got.

Count yourself lucky twice a week! The only time I see my grandchildren is when they want looking after or I go and visit them!!

No such thing as “normal”, it’s all about what you all want as a family. I am lucky to see my AC and GC on a very regular basis, but I know others who are not that interested in babysitting or maintaining close contact. Each to their own, just enjoy .

Twice a year, as they live abroad.

I see my gd everyday she lives with us.

So many of you are so blessed to spend lots of time with your Grandchildren
I rarely see mine as my daughter in law dislikes me intensely
Perhaps twice a year when I meet my son & 3 Little Gradaughters for lunch at a restaurant in the city
My other 4 Grandies are overseas so that’s once a year if I visit them
But the teenage ones overseas do text me from time to time
I tell myself that I just need to get on & live my own life, but sometimes it’s hard especially at Christmas & Birthday times
But they are all doing well at school & college & are healthy as am I
So I do give thanks for that

Once a week would be absolute bliss for me. I just take whatever opportunity I am offered and adjust my diary accordingly as seeing them or my children is number one priority without hesitation. Just wish I was a slightly higher priority on their lists but they do live this modern busy life with both parents working and I recognise their problems. I remember my own Mum saying she didn't see enough of me and I thought I was doing a pretty good job on that score. Guess we'll never be satisfied. At the end of the day, I'm just very grateful to have them in my life. Wonderful.

I’m really lucky, I care for my Grandson two days a week so we’re building a fantastic bond. (Even if I’m shattered by Tuesday evening )

There is no 'right' or'wrong' to this issue. Each family works out the pattern that suits them and even when all other things are equal (distance apart, work commitments, etc) two families with similar living patterns will have widely divergent visiting patterns.

Think back to when you were a young mother, who decided how often to visit or see grandparents, you or the grand parents? A child's parents make all the decisions about this and all other matters concerning the child's welfare.

If you have always had a good and easy relationship with your DD - and as she has lived with you for 5 months, I assume you have, just go with the flow.

There is no such thing as 'normal' in family relationships. Each family works out what is best for them.

When our GC were tiny we used to visit once a week so that they were comfortable with us when required for babysitting. They are older now and have busy lives, we visit maybe twice a month and help out as and when needed. Sleepovers at ours during school holidays are frequent and great fun.

Seems I'm going to be a lucky grandparent compared to others. I will embrace all contact I get. Thank you everyone. This has been very helpful.

I normally see my mum and dad once a week and we see my MIL every few months.

You’re spot on mon, it’s about managing expectations, usually ours, sometimes theirs with babysitting . We’re currently readjusting to changes with them all and are a bit sad, it currently feels odd but experience says it will soon be ‘normal’. Just do what works for you and your daughter, you’ll be fine.

When my son divorced he moved next door to me for four years. In a house I own. I adored him living there because every second weekend and on a Tuesday after school, the children would run round and see me. It enhanced my life and I forged a real bond with them. But like most things it didnt last! New ladyfriend came along and he moved in with her. It was very hard at first as I missed the contact. But I am managing my expectations now! When I hear of friends who have a really close bond and are part of a close knit family .... usually with daughters not sons ...... it makes me feel sad, but hey, you can’t always get what you want. Coming on gransnet makes me realise that it’s fairly usual to be this way when you have sons and sometimes even daughters can be tricky!

I usually see my DGDs once a week when I pick them up from school and they have tea with me. But they only live 15 minutes walk away. Imagine if they lived further (many miles) away it would be much less often.
When our DCs were young it was very different, as PILs lived up North, and my DM at the opposite end of the country - we were half way between them, so children only saw their grandparents in the school holidays, (I was a teacher, and DH worked shifts).
I think once a week is quite usual.

Having sleepovers instead of going there to babysit is always a treat for GPs, parents and most of all the DGC. All mine are dead chuffed at having a GP meet them from and take to nursery/school too.

Hahha highly amusing. Yeah didn't think about babysitting. Just want to have a good bond and be able to do baking and stuff with her.

come on here and i'll insult you about your age, if you want?
Well, you may get asked to babysit in between visits, hopefully.
My mum used to really enjoy babysitting my daughter (if it was convenient for her)
They were best friends, and stayed that way when my daughter grew up into her 30s.

Guess I'll just get into my head once a week! Will miss the morning snuggles thou! And the daily cheek from the dd,usually about my age.

I see my 16 year old grandson once a week.
How strange, I've never contributed really to these threads, because I've only just thought about how often I see him.
Yes, once a week he peddles round on his bike, even in the rain, and sometimes only for 1-2 hours before he has to go again.
I really enjoy seeing him, which has only now occurred to me too.
A night of revelations!

I’m lucky enough to see each of my four DGS at least once a week, often more. But I must say I loved my grandmother to bits and rarely saw her, as she lived away.

I understand your worries though. My DS and family have lived with us for a few months on two occasions, when they were between houses and when they were having major work done on their house. I just loved having them, and it was a major adjustment when they left. Everything seemed unnaturally tidy and quiet, and I did so miss the baby just being there when I got up in the morning and arrived home from work. You’ll soon get used to it though, and it sounds as if you’ll see them often.

Haha thank you for taking the time to reply

I think that's the advice which is given the most on here; managing expectations (not erections, as my phone wanted to write it!)
Its good that you're already in that frame of mind.

Thank you everyone. I'm not demanding any amount of time from my daughter. I understand she wants to embrace her new life and I fully support her. I'm mearly trying to manage my own expections. It's hard going from a daily parent to suddenly it going weekly. It's going to be a huge adjustment and I just wanted to know how others have it.

it depends where they live. One D lives close but is busy working and the other lives 100 miles away but awful traffic conditions on the roads to the town they live in.
We see each other on Birthdays but work comes in between. Women and mothers have jobs these days and can't make visits like housewives used to.

You will find twice a week plenty when you have got used to it. Your D needs her own space to develop and live her own life.