Does anyone live in unsociable neighbourhood

Neighbors here have offered to help, but I have not needed anything. There's an active village Facebook group and all houses have had a leaflet through the door offering assistance. The pub is doing takeaways and delivering which some people like. So yes, have felt that people have pulled together.

I’m an incomer in our village but because I had a business in a nearby town I was ‘known’ so I know quite a few of the real , and more recent villagers and that is nice.
Whilst walking round the village in our new lock down mode its lovely to say hello to those walking in the opposite direction.
BUT to all you runners with your headphones on. You miserable *s.

I would say our street is pretty unsociable, we are a mix of houses and flats. The flats are occupied mainly by 20 and 30 somethings, we see them have deliveries nearly every day, none of us oldies have been able to obtain any groceries. Not one young person has asked if anyone would like help with prescriptions or if they could bring a loaf of bread.
I have never heard anyone clapping on a Thursday.

Is this a North / South thing?

Northerners still just arrive on the doorstep to visit (in the olden day’s, before CV).

I think Southerners ring Or text ahead ‘to see if you’re home/it’s convenient’.

?

In that case, Urmstongran, I’m a southerner - which is odd because I’ve lived in the north for the vast majority of my life.

We have a very sociable community. We have a Facebook group, so if anyone wants to borrow something/ has something to give away/ ask about bin collection or whatever there is always an answer. We have a summer street party and we had a pop up concert outside last weekend( people watching from their windows). I think it’s because we are in a private road and have to pay a maintenance charge, so have to have a management
Committee, residents association etc. So everyone gets to know everyone else. We only had one set of nasty anti social neighbours, but they moved away in the end.

We are in the South, but our close of 16 houses has really come together, setting up a WhatsApp group early on, which we use to advise on who has a delivery slot and can add stuff onto it. We all come out on Thursdays, and use the opportunity to ask if anyone needs anything. When I mentioned we couldn't find flour, there was a ring on my doorstep a few minutes later and there was a bag on my doorstep.

Before this started I only knew the occupants of seven of the houses, but now I know the names of everyone, and have had chocolate cookies left on my step by a former stranger!

So I wouldn't call ours unsociable, we must be lucky.

By the way I should add I ve ‘only’ lived here 37 years ?
No not one note through the door people do come out to clap and I like that but no offers of anything else and no I m not in the south as such although I am south of the north ?

We live in a small block of 9 flats, 8 are occupied. A mixture of ages, some couples, some single ladies. We all get on and look out for each other.

Mine's a funny one. I live on the friendly side where most people have livec for decades. Nobody knows anyone else on the other side. Theyre not UN friendly I think just busier and more renters who move around

We’ve got a helpline in our village. I put my name down as a helper but no one needs help. Which is good.

Bought our house nearly 30 years ago from new, a little cul-de-sac; glad to say that half are still here, and newcomers have slotted in easily. Ever since lock-down we have had a weekly Sunday lunchtime drinks session. We all take our chairs and drinks onto our drives, and shout at each other across at least 10 metres!
Everyone is very sociable; we have an annual Christmas dinner out every year, plus coffee mornings, and help each other out. When DH died I couldn't have had more offers of help and support.
I always thought I would move if DH died, as I have a large garden and house to cope with, but there is no way I would now.

We live in a road with mixed houses and different age groups. People are generally very friendly apart from those who allow their dogs to mess up pavements. I was brought up in a big family and always told to stand up for myself to anyone. People generally are polite however I can not imagine me putting up with anyone acting like washer women. Gossiping and acting like characters from a Catherine Cookson novel. I have a dear old friend and neighbour who we love. I have always cooked and looked out for her and the neighbour on her other side is helpful too. Treat people the way they treat you that's the best way to be politeness costs nothing.

The region of the state I live is socially distant- They're friendly to each other, their families having remained in one place for generations- Not so for newcomers- Even if the newcomer has lived in the village/town for decades-

Most of the families have formed bonds through their agricultural relationships- The only friendly farmer I've met came from the UK! She talked a blue streak and was a joy to listen to-

What the state does have to offer is affordability and doesn't tax social security - And .. It's pretty .. But the weather is cloudy except for summer months ..

We are a curious mix, our road is mainly very old timberframed farmhouses wide to the street, but only one room deep, so there is a lot of space between one front door and the next, we know each other, are friendly, and have been in each others houses, but not often.

But no-one has asked us, how we are managing. Partly I think it is because we do not look or appear to be as old as we are, and we are out walking everyday, and going out in the car to shop etc but none of our family live near us and the neighbours know that, and we have chatted several times since the lockdown.

I am sure they would help if we asked and I would do so if I needed to, but it is curious that no-one has said anything to us.

I wave to neighbours if I see them or say Good Morning, nothing more, everyone tends to keep themselves to themselves. I am not great at social chat so it suits me fine. No offers of help. The first thing our next door neighbours did when they moved in 5 years ago was to remove the existing fence (about 4 foot high) and the mature shrubs and replaced it with a 6 foot (at least) fence, says it all really! We could not see into our neighbours garden before as the shrubs were so dense.

I asked our young neighbour if he would get a few essential things for us which he did. I asked him again about a week later and he did. AIBU to think he might offer maybe he thinks I'm a nuisance, I really don't like to keep asking.

My daughters friend regularly calls on the elderly neighbours. Last time she knocked the lady said " Oh it's you again" lol
I've found when I lived in cul de sacs it was nuch friendlier. In my present home we could be dead and no one would know. They all keep to themselves.
I lived in a council estate when we first married and neighbours were wonderful. If it rained they brought your washing in. When I was sick my neighbour brought a pot of stew for the children. We helped each other in lots of ways. People aren't like that now.

We live in London. Our neighbours are great. We have had several offers of help at this particular time but also on other occasions. On one side, my neighbour is very good at baking and often brings us rolls that she makes. When my husband came home from hospital the year before last, she used to bring round home made soup. We don't usually socialise with our neighbours in the sense of going out together (although we have done once or twice) but we always help each other when needed. They are very nice on the other side as well. It's a long road and, in general, people are pleasant and sociable.

My Mum lives in a village, where she's lived for around 50 years and her neighbours on either side have also lived there quite a long time. She has never been over the doorstep of the house next door and the neighbour on the other side is most unfriendly - although her husband is quite nice. Given my Mum's age - she's 99 - I think they could be a little more helpful and friendly. Villages aren't always the charming, community-minded little places that people think they will be.

I used to know my neighbours when we all took our kids (then grandkids) to the local school. Many have moved away since.

Newcomers seem to drive everywhere and keep themselves to themselves, apart from a quick 'Hello'. Most of them work full time.

I do know many fellow dog walkers from surrounding roads, though. They frequently check that I'm OK and ask if I need anything - even those much older than me!

Of the 14 houses in this little cul de sac, only 2 of us don't have cars.
I don't know about my other non-driving neighbour but not one person has offered to shop for me.
I didn't really expect it though.

BradfordLass, if I lived near you I'd ask if you needed anything-

So it seems I’m not alone, I was beginning to think this neighbourhood was in the minority which is quite depressing in the current climate. I’m glad I asked the question, for the record I live in a middle class area in the Midlands surrounded by more ‘senior’ people. Heyho, keep smiling and carry on. Thanks everyone for your responses and take care ???

Oh , How I also wish we lived in an area that was more Socially Community Spirited .
Our Street is not a small tucked away one ,is pretty long around 120 Properties now consisting of an added block of Flats , We are also a Main route out of our Village & as such a Bus Route into the City. I have lived here since “86 My immediate Next door neighbour in her 60’s also has lived in the same house since Birth . The Neighbour to the left has lived here for around 20 plus years & so it continues down the Street . she’s odd anyway only speaks when you speak to her & the. It’s only about the weather .
As I always went to work full time I never got to know people on a personal basis just a nod & Hello .
Hardly anyone goes out to “Clap on a Thursday “ for the NHS a very sad show , VE Day was much the same .
Oh for the Days I lived in a London Street & we had a huge Street Party ( it was also a long Street ) With everyone contributing for The Queens Silver Jubilee or for the Royal Wedding in a much Smaller Street on a new Estate a Square of 13 or so Houses . What Lovely Community Spirit .

I’d say ours is just right. We’ve had offers of help and shopping, and have a couple of phone numbers just in case, but they all know we are getting Sainsburys deliveries and can cope fine. Older neighbours are being looked out for. Plenty of passing chat when hanging out the washing and sitting in the garden. Swapping of plants and allotment produce, jam and chutney, and at the moment loans of books and exercise dvds. Most of us exchange Christmas cards, but don’t do street parties, which suits us fine. And there are occasional minor fall outs to keep us nosey neighbours entertained!