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Boasting

(122 Posts)
Alexa Mon 27-Jul-20 12:14:37

A woman neighbour who rang me about a friendly but impersonal business matter described in detail a lovely holiday place she owns, although I had not asked her to tell me about it, and it had nothing to do with the business matter. I think this is bragging. Why would anyone brag to me? I don't brag about material possessions and I own very little, so why would she do this?

I am disappointed in her as I'd always thought she had really good manners.

Squiffy Mon 27-Jul-20 12:23:32

Was she, perhaps, hoping that you would enquire about renting it for your next holiday? Just a thought!

EllanVannin Mon 27-Jul-20 12:26:02

Yes, it sounded as though she was advertising.

Furret Mon 27-Jul-20 12:28:07

So perhaps she is very proud of her little getaway.

BlueSky Mon 27-Jul-20 12:31:00

Alexa possibly as Squffy suggests! This reminds me of a taxi driver who picked us up at the airport back home in the UK. He quizzed us why we wanted to put ourselves through all that, he said he always holidayed in his camper van, which we could rent at very competitive rates! He became quite insistent so much that we told him to stop before we got to our house in case he turned up on our doorstep!

Alexa Mon 27-Jul-20 15:26:57

If she had wanted to sell it or rent it to me that would have been A Okay by me. Or if I had been the sort of person beside whom she felt inferior I could understand though I'd be sorry if she was scared of me.

But she is younger, has a good job, a nice husband, successful family, liked and respected by the neighbours. Yes, Furret, I think she is proud of her getaway and I can understand why she might be proud of it. She had no means of knowing whether or not I longed for a getaway but was too poor or too unwell to have such a thing.

This is not the first time someone has been like this. Twice, actually, complete strangers at a holiday resort approached me and out of the blue informed me of something glamorous and expensive they were doing.
I

Orangerose Mon 27-Jul-20 15:41:11

I’d listen politely and let it go in one ear and out the other. It’s just not worth getting wound up about imo.

timetogo2016 Mon 27-Jul-20 15:43:42

Spot on Orangerose.

Orangerose Mon 27-Jul-20 15:45:13

Thank you timetogo.

Scribbles Mon 27-Jul-20 15:56:16

Twice, actually, complete strangers at a holiday resort approached me and out of the blue informed me of something glamorous and expensive they were doing.

Maybe they were just feeling excited but lonely, without partner or close friends, and simply wanted to tell somebody about their glamorous/expensive activity and you have a friendly and understanding face?

quizqueen Mon 27-Jul-20 16:04:05

A lot of sour grapes on this site. Envy or Comparison is the Thief of Joy. I say good luck to people who can afford nice things; they or someone in their family have probably worked hard to afford them, and even if they won the money on the lottery, so what!!

Toadinthehole Mon 27-Jul-20 16:54:57

It’s not the bragging side....you know, the fact that they’re showing off or whatever, no....it’s just so boring to listen to. I have absolutely no interest in what people own and how much money they have, unless they’ve worked hard and it’s well deserved. There’s still a limit to how long I can listen🤪

geekesse Mon 27-Jul-20 17:08:42

It’s worth noting that GN is in some ways a microcosm of normal life. Some people share things that bring them great misery or great joy just for the sake of sharing - ‘I need to tell someone...’

It’s highly unlikely that your neighbour was boasting about what she has in order to hurt you. Most people don’t do that. Most probably she had just had a great time and was sharing her pleasure as an indication of friendship. May I suggest that you think about why you have such a resentful and judgemental response? The fact that you have responded this way more than once should give you food for thought.

BlueSky Mon 27-Jul-20 17:44:47

Alexa you must be a smart lady and people feel privileged to speak to you. So they put on their best telephone voice and tell you about the glamorous things in their own life, hoping you'll be impressed! When people talk to me I usually just nod approvingly as I can't hear them properly!

Alexa Mon 27-Jul-20 18:14:09

Geekesse, It is against the rules of other decent discussion forums to characterise fellow members. Members should discuss the topic and not the person who posted the topic. The topic is Boasting not Alexa's character.

MerylStreep Mon 27-Jul-20 18:20:36

geekesse
Well said 👌

geekesse Mon 27-Jul-20 18:20:43

Alexa

Geekesse, It is against the rules of other decent discussion forums to characterise fellow members. Members should discuss the topic and not the person who posted the topic. The topic is Boasting not Alexa's character.

Alexa, we are discussing your response to the boasting, not your character.

Alexa Mon 27-Jul-20 18:28:26

Geekesse, do you know what it means to characterise somebody?

Chewbacca Mon 27-Jul-20 18:30:47

I don't know whether it's since the COVID lockdown but people, in general, seem to have become so much mire watchful and resentful of others lately. Watching and resenting anyone who they felt weren't "following the rules" as stringently as they were or resentful of people going on holiday abroad and then having to go into self quarantine on their return and so they'd "been foolish and taken unnecessary risks". Why can't we just be pleased for those who have something that brings pleasure into their lives, instead of all the negativity and resentment?

rafichagran Mon 27-Jul-20 18:39:43

I would not have a problem with this at all. I really do not know why people get het up and annoyed by it.
I wonder if it is jealousy that people cannot be happy for someone else.

geekesse Mon 27-Jul-20 18:42:53

Alexa: Geekesse, do you know what it means to characterise somebody?

Yes.

Urmstongran Mon 27-Jul-20 18:49:16

Bloomin’ eck just read this thread - I can’t believe how quickly some threads degenerate into a bun fight (over nothing) these days.
😦

Callistemon Mon 27-Jul-20 19:16:59

Scribbles

^Twice, actually, complete strangers at a holiday resort approached me and out of the blue informed me of something glamorous and expensive they were doing.^

Maybe they were just feeling excited but lonely, without partner or close friends, and simply wanted to tell somebody about their glamorous/expensive activity and you have a friendly and understanding face?

Did they invite you to go along with them for a lovely lunch? They could have been timeshare touts!

Callistemon Mon 27-Jul-20 19:21:24

Urmstongran

Bloomin’ eck just read this thread - I can’t believe how quickly some threads degenerate into a bun fight (over nothing) these days.
😦

In the grand scheme of things it matters not a jot Alexa.

Rise above the boasting, just nod and say 'hmm, lovely, how wonderful for you'.

Callistemon Mon 27-Jul-20 19:22:45

Urmstongran sorry, I should have said, yes, it is nothing really in the grand scheme of things.