Nanny or Grandma

Maggiemaybe ré my comment, I was merely quoting my Mum, I became a Grandma through my daughters choice.

No sorry, Lucca other posts popped up before I posted mine.
I was referring to the posts of Jaxjacky & Grandma70.

Yes, nursemaid is an outdated word. I used it because I couldn’t think,of a word to describe the role of a nanny. She’s someone employed and paid to take care of the children’s practical needs, I suppose. I’m sure most people have come across this, in books if not in life. That’s why I find nanny to mean grandmother a strange usage. I didn’t hear it until I was grown up, and I’m not upper class, I assure you.

GagaJo I love he calls you Gaga, it’s very cute. I wouldn’t care if my Granddaughter calls me strange alien creature, but until she can talk I like to be known as her Nanny, but sadly I can’t

Gillybob you have made this Nanny feel very happy, thank you for this advice

CrochetJo congratulations. You are so lucky to have your little granddaughter living with you. Don’t let this minor issue overshadow this precious time.
I would suggest you say casually to your daughter as Mil is Grandma and that title suits her what name do think I should use? See if she has a preference or even suggest a couple of options. No point mentioning nanny as that’s already rules out.

Agree. Just say sorry for the nanny idea What would you like? But nicely not huffily !

I agree that your name will evolve. I prefer Nan or Nanny as it sounds younger than Grandma or Granny. But what your daughter cannot stop is you later calling yourself Nanny to the little one as they are growing up. Then the child will come to know that Nanny & whatever your daughter decides to call you are the same person. My mum was a Nanny & the generation above her they were called Nanny and where they lived.

I honestly feel that it should be personal choice, when I had my children I asked the living Grandparents what they’d like to be known as and I respected their wishes.
Thanks for all the good advice on my first post, except the one that wrongly quoted ‘underlying issues’

Please dont worry, it will sort itself out. Congratulations on your lovely Grandaughter.

I agree it should be up to you CrochetJo. You should get a lovely warm and fuzzy feeling when you hear the little one call for you in whatever name you choose. Whether it’s Nanny,Granny or Nan your granddaughter will love you just the same.

I always wanted to be a plain and simple Grandma as my own grandma (who lived to be 99) was the most truly wonderful and loving person. If I could be half the grandma to my grandchildren that she was to me then I would be happy .

Lucca

Agree. Just say sorry for the nanny idea What would you like? But nicely not huffily !

I’m finally getting used to knowing how these threads work and realised I can quote people comments.

When she ruled out ‘Nanny’ I asked what would she like me to be known as, she just said ‘I don’t know but not that’

I was fortunate to be invited to attend the birth of my twin grandchildren. When it was near the birth of the first twin the midwife turned to me and said, "Come on Nanny, say hello to your grandson."
Up until then I wasn't bothered what my grandchildren eventually called me, as long as it was polite. Somehow the title sounded right and it stuck.
Doesn't bother me that some consider it lower class. I come from good peasant stock and I'm proud of it. ?

Perhaps your DD, like me, pictures a goat when she hears the word nanny.
Children don't mind what name you use as long as they have your attention.

gillybob

I agree it should be up to you CrochetJo. You should get a lovely warm and fuzzy feeling when you hear the little one call for you in whatever name you choose. Whether it’s Nanny,Granny or Nan your granddaughter will love you just the same.

I always wanted to be a plain and simple Grandma as my own grandma (who lived to be 99) was the most truly wonderful and loving person. If I could be half the grandma to my grandchildren that she was to me then I would be happy .

Gillybob you give the best advice ever, thank you so much. Myself and my children haven’t had much experience of Grandparents as my Dads parents died before I was born and I didn’t see my Mums parents after she gave my Dad custody of me, then my stepmum and Dad split before I had my children. So I wanted it to be different for this little girl.

Thank you CrochetJo happy to help and share. Grans, Nannie’s,Nan’s and Grandma’s ....helping each other . What could be nicer?

I was so lucky to have my Grandma in my life until I was 54 and a grandma myself. She was a great, great grandma and for 10 years we were a 5 generation family . I took my own grandchildren to see her every week and they called her “little Grandma” as she was tiny .

I’m sure things will work out for you and your little granddaughter . Things will just fall into place . The main thing is to be happy and enjoy every precious second you have with her .

CrochetJo you say the only grandmother in your daughter's life was called "Nanna" but there was no real relationship.
Might it be that when you said you wanted to be called "Nanny" your daughter's immediate gut reaction was that it's too similar?
The fact that she can't think of anything else, but definitely doesn't want that, suggests to me that the name has unpleasant connotations for her that she doesn't want for her baby.
I understand your disappointment but I really wouldn't push it yet, let things settle down and just enjoy having them live with you. How lucky are they!
Congratulations to you all ?

I was so lucky to have my Grandma in my life until I was 54 and a grandma myself. She was a great, great grandma and for 10 years we were a 5 generation family . I took my own grandchildren to see her every week and they called her “little Grandma” as she was tiny

gilly you were very privileged to have that generation span, and for so long.

'Little Grandma' - aww

Don't fret about a name. It's only a name. It's too early yet to bombard your daughter with questions - let things settle then explain to her GENTLY that you would like to be called pussycat or whatever you want. For now, take GENTLE care of your daughter and her baby (and the boyfriend) WE none of us know what others are truly thinking or feeling. Probably best to leave the whole discussion for now and just be a MUM to your daughter. No one can ever replace that reltionship.Her hormones are all over the place. Be the steady rock that you are for her. All else will follow - give it time and think about her no about you,

My mother's parents were known by us, her grandchildren, as Nanny and Pop. I didn't realise until my sister became a grandmother that she, my sister, hated the name Nanny and would never want to be called it.

good luck. It will work out as the other wise people have said! My grandchlidren call me Grandma Pam, so no one gets confused with the other grandmothers (when I'm not being called the mad old bat by the older ones that is!!).

Your lovely new Granddaughter will find her own term of endearment for you My dad was always known by my DD & DS as Gangan chosen by my daughter! My mum was always Nana but DH & myself are Grandad & Nan its all part of the getting used to being older thing really so hold tight until she can talk x

I just love being ‘Granny’ but honestly wouldn’t care what I was called, as long as not too rude! My sister was called YaYa as her first grandchild couldn’t say Granny and the name stuck - known throughout family and by six grandchildren, sons in law, even husband as YaYa! It’s very affectionate and unique to her.....sadly, she died unexpectedly last year and everyone mourns the devastating loss of ‘YaYa’. Life’s too short to stress over a name ......

Please don't get upset. When baby can talk it will find its own name for you. Ours call us granny and grandad but they use the same names for their other grandparents, adding the Christian name to show the difference. They came up with this themselves. I have a friend who's called Grannyknit for obvious reasons.

Try not to place so much emphasis on it. I have no children of my own but have step children, one set of grandchildren call me Grandma, the other call me Mamma (a local term). Neither would have been my choice but I didn’t feel I could say anything as I was grateful that my stepsons counted me as the grandmother to their children. However, when you have a small person joyously flinging themselves at you shouting “Mamma” or writing little notes saying that they ‘love you to the moon and back’, it matters not a jot.

Also, they may have entirely different ideas. My late Mother wanted to be ‘Granny’.when the eldest was a toddler she called my Mum “Gan Gan” and it stuck. All six referred to her as ‘Gan Gan’ for the rest of her life and still talk about ‘Gan Gan’ although they are all in their 20s.

Congratulations by the way, don’t worry too much and I hope you will be being a grandmother as much as I do ?